SNN UPDATE #34

Saturday, 1 February 1997

                    =/\= SNN UPDATE =/\=                    
                 =/\= Stardate 97020.1 =/\=                 
                                                            
It's election time in STF and SNN UPDATE is there to cover  
it.  This season's elections were uncommonly slow and       
disaster-plagued.  The turnout was horrendous.  In fact,    
is was so horrendous that I'm considering extending the     
election to give non-voters more time to email... JUST KID- 
DING!  In today's UPDATE we have some interesting STF       
comings and goings.  Election results are tomorrow...<eg>   
                                                            
Read on... if you dare.                                     
=/\= NEWS                                                   
* First and foremost, SNN UPDATE is proud to announce the   
 return of an STF legend:  Brian "That's right.  I never    
 resigned.  You got all that?" Misamore.  JUST KIDDING!     
 Actually, our come-home hero is none other than Mike "Da   
 Popa" Barclay, affectionately known to friends and         
 ex-subordinates as "Barcbutt."  Barclay has been spotted   
 hanging around various election-related subs but hasn't    
 made any comments as to whether or not he'll rejoin.       
 This publication, for one, would like to see the return    
 of the ex-FComm and Ex-CO.  The  following two news        
 stories should give you a good idea why STF could use an   
 experienced ex-Admiral such as Barclay.                    
* Why, you ask, do we need an admiral?  Other than to keep  
 Mike "I'm Baa-aack!" Ballway from being the highest-ranked 
 non-elected STFer, the reasons come in the form of R.E.    
 "The Big Cheesehead" McCullick and Becca "BJ likes to eat  
 BJ" Juarez.  The former, known to many as PREMz in recog-  
 nition of his service as President of STF lately, was      
 found shot this morning in the Executive Mansion...heh     
 heh heh (or "tee-hee," as Barclay would say)...Actually,   
 the Prez has not been heard from for quite some time, late 
 November to be specific.  Where has our Prez gone?  Some   
 say Akron.  Others, Qo'noS.  Still others think he was     
 kidnapped by Brian "Foremost Fleet" Misamore.  Will the    
 madness end?  Probably not.                                
* Our second disappearing act involves Becca "*P was...a    
 pain in the ***" Juarez.  Just yesterday (31 Ja) Becca     
 logged off Prodigy for her final time in the foreseeable   
 future;  she was forced to leave when her subscription ran 
 out and her family pulled out of *P.  She can still be     
 reached on AOL at "becky45456@aol.com."                    
* Our third disappearance has a somewhat happy ending.  I   
 owe all of STF an apology for not being around lately;     
 While some of you may see this as a plus, there are        
 undoubtably those out there who feel this is not a good    
 thing.  SO, here is my public apology.  I was distracted   
 by exams and schoolwork, not to mention Brian Misamore,    
 but that's no real excuse.  I'll try not to let it happen  
 again.  In any event, all of you who voted know that I     
 *was* checking the voting, and I'm reasonably sure that I  
 got a good count in our elections.                         
* Prodigy Internet:  Friend or foe?  Good ISP or Evil ISP?  
 Is Prodigy's new service a Ken Marklan or a Brian Misa-    
 more?  In short, is this something we should be putting    
 money into?  That's the question.  Answers, or at least    
 good arguments, can be found at "STF PI," an argument sub- 
 ject devoted to that eternal question...To PI or not to PI?
=/\= SNN UPDATE                                             
is published regularly when Mike "So I like the way 'Brian  
Misamore' sounds, so shoot me" Ballway isn't AWOL.  Which   
is often, contrary to recent studies.  SNN UPDATE itself is 
committed to the Jouranlistic Motto of "Quick, Informative, 
Totally Biased Reporting of STF Events."  Tomorrow's STF    
Event being reported is Election Results -- wow!  Bets on   
the results, compliments on making it back to STF, comp-    
laints about our abscence from the annals of STF journalism 
lately (yeah, right!) and other worthless correspondences   
can be sent via e-mail addressed to:                        
SNN UPDATE, c/o Cdre. Mike "bwsc65c@prodigy.com" Ballway.