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WeBBsights takes hiatus, Government working
again
WeBBsights returns
after summer break
by Larry Garfield, WeBBsights Associate
Editor
CHICAGO, ILLINOIS -- Following our last issue
on May 31, which itself had been delayed to confusion created by the defection
of Romulan Subcommander Pez, WeBBsights went on sabbatical to rest
and recoup, prepare for college, and check out the hot chicks (and hunks,
for Deanne) on the beach. In the interim, STF underwent the horrors
of a Presidential Election, the first in 17 months. Although plans
had been made to have complete live coverage of the election returns, internal
difficulties and low voter turnout made such a display of power impossible.
Mike Bourdaa, author of the WeBB software and former Commander of Fleet
Three, was elected president in late June, replacing two term incumbent
"GMDF Cheese" Greg Hertzsch. Bourdaa's new Cabinet was quickly appointed,
and can now be viewed in the Central HQ section of the OOC Fleet.
The addition of two new fleets to the WeBB likewise didn't escape SNN's
attention, just WeBBsights'. Fleet Two, under the command
of Commodore Mike Ballway, was transferred from STF*Prodigy to the WeBB,
to accompany Ballway's move as he shifted to a college network as well
as to provide a haven for non-fanatical STFers. Founded with former
STF2 flagships the USS Constellation and the USS Trinitron
nand the new USS Nautilus, STF2 operates at a purposefully maintained
slower rate than the rest of the WeBB, and so far is functioning smoothly.
The more mainstream Fleet Six was also added, commanded by Fleet Captain
Colin Wyers. STF6 began life with the USS Independence, which
had been drydocked at Starbase 202 and the USS Ares, which now joins
its third fleet. Wyers was replaced as FComm-4 by his former AFComm,
Fleet Captain Larry Garfield. The addition of these two new fleets
brings the WeBB to a population of five fleets and 20 ships.
STF Government functions smoothly,
news organizations panic
by Larry Garfield, the Thorn in Mike Ballway's
Side
CENTRAL HQ -- Recent weeks have seen an unprecedented
move in the STF government towards a peaceful mean s of conducting business.
Standing in stark contrast to the ED Conflict of Early 1998 (it's official
name now), the issue began right at the beginning of September, when Bill
Gunty proposed an "Elite ship," akin in theory to the USS Valiant,
the DS9 ship of the episode of the same name. The "USS Elite"
would have been staffed by invitation only, and would consist of the "best
of the best of the best" of STF. The potential for favoritism and
segregation this plan posed led it to be dismissed, but not before being
legitimately considered. Meanwhile, on September 9 Mark Loganbach
officially proposed an idea that had been discussed by Loganbach, Bob Spurlin,
and others in IRC, the "USS Speedy." Intended as the exact
opposite of STF2's paradigm, this new ship would be designed to be home
to daily loggers only, and to move at the fastest pace ever. Although
there was some speculation among the NEs that this was really a covert
attempt to usurp the MAS award, the idea was considered by a number of
people in the President's Office. Gunty, Loganbach, Spurlin, and
Jim Armstrong have been the proposal's most vocal supporters, however they
claim to speak for over a dozen interested members. Seamus Hughes,
ironically famous for commanding the USS Hopper during its reign
as the undisputed MAS, and Mike Barclay, famous for his intense dislike
of multiple characters, have both expressed concerns and objections
about the idea, however, unlike earlier discussions they were actually
heard. Hughes had problems. Er, that is, he had problems with
the ship because he feared that such a fast pace would make the ship impossible
to read for even the fastest members, to which Larry Garfield responded
with a proposal to use a Yub nub-class ship as a test bed, as its
crew complement of only six would help to alleviate this problem.
Several fleets were considered to host the experimental ship, including
even the deliberately slow Fleet Two, which FComm-2 Mike Ballway agreed
would host the new ship if no other spot could be found. Eventually,
it was decided on September 13 that Fleet Five would host the Fast
Ship (name pending), commanded by Nathan Miller as part of his promotion
to FComm-5, replacing B. J. Phillips whose activity level as FComm has
unfortunately waned too far. The class of the ship is currently under
consideration, with a Yub nub being one of several possibilities.
Fallout at SNN Center
by Larry Garfield and Mike Ballway, would-be
Comedians
CENTRAL HQ -- While definitely a mile stone, STF's
expansion to 5 WeBB fleets has prompted the WeBBsights management
(Motto: "I can't take it any more!") to discontinue the Fleet Beat section.
Major points and weird plot twists will remain, however, thanks in part
to Deanne Morgan, former correspondent for Fleet Three who has agreed to
assist WeBBsights in RPG reporting, the last WeBBsights staff member
to remain.. Over the summer, WeBBsights Society Editor Will
Yates was trapped in a TAR file, and due to the difficulty in finding decompressors
that support this format will likely remain there.
As you may have noted, the recent governmental activity has occurred
with a complete lack of personal attacks by high ranking members of the
government. Aside from farm jokes and spelling attacks by Seamus
Hughes and Colin Wyers, the discussion so far has been just that, a discussion.
A first in STF, it has nonetheless caused great consternation at SNN Center.
Following the rapid increase in downloads during the ED Conflict, SNN's
Editorial Staff isn't sure that a government that does its job without
destroying reputations will provide them with the material they need to
scandalize the club. Several staff members suggested that WeBBsights'
recent hiatus may be responsible for the increase in politeness in the
club, but were quickly sacked. Mark Wilson, Associate Editor for
SNN Headline News, now the only SNN publication on Prodigy, took
matters into his own hands on one occasion and tried to cause some scandal
himself, but he was quickly rebuked by Executive Editor Mike Ballway, who
informed him that causing trouble to make news was completely against SNN
policy, unless a pseudonym was used. Associate Editor Larry Garfield,
who had attempted to act as a referee during the ED Conflict, has chosen
instead to bask in the warm, friendly glow of a government that does its
job smoothly, and write very long articles about how wonderful it is in
order to fill up the space vacated by personal attacks. SNN Officially
embraces the "kindler, gentler" STF Command, even if it does make our jobs
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Personality Focus:
Bob Spurlin, Speedy Thinker
by Larry Garfield, WeBBsights "Peopel
Person"
HIGH SHOALS, GA -- Bob Spurlin has been a member
of STF for only two months, but has already begun to have a major impact
on the club. Brought to you by the letter "Z," Bob maintains seven
characters on the Harrier, Nautilus, Columbus, Dresden,
Genesis, Concorde, and Independence. Four of
them are named after gods whose names begin with "Z." More recently,
Bob was the original impetus behind the "USS Speedy" concept, currently
being discussed in Command. He considers himself a daily logger,
and would like to see a place made for the numerous other peoplel like
himself. Bob does have concerns about the potential for OOC fighting
on the proposed Fast Ship, but feels that it should be given a fair chance
to prove itself, just as STF2 has.
Bob, 46, is a travelling financial consultant for Clarus Financials,
a software firm. He finds time for STF while waiting in hotel rooms
for his next flight, which will take himi to his connecting flight to his
connection in Des Moines for his flight to his meeting. His biggest
concern is that he is "here to play and have a good time. Some people
forget that." Prior to STF, Bob also had experiance with Shadowrun
and GURPS Role Playing. He just recieved his Ph.D. in business.
McParty VII a success
by Mike Ballway, Pepsi Drinker
COLA LAKE, RISA -- The annual month-long celebration
of weirdness known as the McParty was a complete success this year, thanks
in part to the release this summer of a brand new soft drink in some parts
of the US known as Surge. Containing 9 parts caffeine, 8 parts sugar,
and 1 part water, Surge came in as the winner this year, with 124.8 liters
drunk. Coke and Pepsi were neck and neck right up to the line, with
Coke barely edging out Pepsi 98.73 liters to 98.6 liters in official McParty
figures, although the independent McParty Beverage Consumption Office of
Fleet Two has challenged these findings, alleging that Pepsi is the victor
by a margin of 98.65 liters to 98.63 liters. Mountain Dew pulled
in third with 69.2 liters, and Sprite in fourth with 45.2 liters.
The favorite, RC Cola, faired poorly this year, with only 2 cans drunk
during the month long party. On the Jello front, there was little
in the way of definitive victories, as Red Jello forces drew traditional
Blue Jello to a draw, with the renegade Black Jello of Owen Townes providing
momentary distraction. Greg Hertzsch's "Mr. Hankey" Brown Jello was
unable to hold its shape long enough to provide much of a threat.
OOC Still alive after party
by Larry Garfield, Devout Liberal
SISKO TEMPLE, ROMANOVA VII -- Although the McParty
is over, life in OOC is at an all-time WeBB high. The most active
part of the OOC consisted for a time of arch-conservative Colin Wyers attempting
to use the Lewinsky scandal as a cover to attack all things liberal and
forward-thinking [remember that these are two separate things --Ed.],
while self-proclaimed "realist" Larry Garfield "calmly" pointed out the
gaping "flaws" in Wyers' arguments. SNN, for its part, has chosen
to remain neutral. Meanwhile, the Religious Wars may be reheating,
with the burning of the Sisko Temple. Arson is suspected, with possible
links to one Jeremy Friedman of the Sinclairists, led by self-styled "Pope"
Greg Hertzsch. Millions of faithful Siskoists, including the Fransiskoan
Monks turned out to rebuild the temple, while Ferengi Commerce Authority
Liquidators descended on the Temple of Babylon. Financial difficulties
had been linked to an off-world account held by Friedman, who has since
been excommunicated by Hertzsch. Allegations of the involvement of
the infamous Siskoist financier Larry the Liquidator have been denied.
Farmer Joe has taken the McParty clean-up crew hostage, demanding an end
to the "Kick-the-Seamus" party that has replaced it.
SNN UPDATE
shelved after 65
by Mike Ballway, the Reporter Formerly Responsible
for SNN UPDATE and now Represented by this Newsletter
SUITE 45, SNN CENTER, CHICAGO -- Last month, in
an unprecedented "triple-feature" trilogy of issues, Mike Ballway finally
bid adieu to the readership of SNN UPDATE. Since early
1998 Mike had known that he was to leave Prodigy in the Summer, and on
26 August it became a reality, with his last post -- the final edition
of SNN UPDATE.
Since 9 September 1994, SNN UPDATE had been the
semiofficial online newsletter of STF*Prodigy, and before the debut of
WeBBsights in October 1997, it was the only regularly-published
STF periodical of any kind (it was even published more frequently than
the Personnel Department's crew manifests, back in the days before automatic
rostering). SNN UPDATE's impact on STF is not to be
discounted; although it did not invent the "quotes-in-names" device (example:
Mike "The IRCheese" Bourdaa; this device was stolen from a Personnel manifests
written by Mike Cathcart), it made them popular and its brand of political
satire was well-respected by frequent visitors to the Prodigy subject [STF
- CNN OF STF]. SNN UPDATE is succeeded by both
this publication and SNN Headline News, the SNN newsletter that
for almost a year has been the Sammy Sosa to UPDATE's
Mark McGwire, and continues as STF*Prodigy's only newsletter while also
publishing a separate WeBB edition. SNN Executive Editor Mike Ballway,
the sole writer of SNN UPDATE, will produce some sort
of retrospective on it at some point in the future; for now, the archive
at [s-f.c/snn/su/index.html] has everything
you need to review SNN UPDATE's historic impact on
STF. Former SNN UPDATE correspondent Peter Peterson
has agreed to sign on to the WeBBsights staff as a source of bad
jokes.
WeBBsights gets competition
by Mike Ballway, WeBBsights Competition
Correspondent
CIRCULATION DEPARTMENT, SNN CENTER, CHICAGO --
With SNN UPDATE folding, one would expect the level
of competition in the STF newsmedia to diminish -- not so! Starting in
mid-August, SNN Headline News writer
Mark Wilson brought his brand of irreverant (not to mention irrelevant)
political satire to the WeBB, in the first issue of the SNN/HN WeBB
Edition. Since then, Mark has come under fire from various WeBBsters who
lack STF*Prodigy's keen understanding of the Convert from STNG's neuroses;
sources close to SNN, though, say that they expect the WeBBsters to eventually
learn to tune out Mark, just as Prodigy has (JOKE!).
In non-SNN news, Former Member, Terra Nova-class Seamus Hughes,
who recently rejoined, barring us from using that joke again, took some
time out from the "sEXPLODINGSHEEEamus" plague to try and make good on
a half-year-old promise of to start up some serious competition for WeBBsights.
The new newsletter, "Aye on
the WeBB," held no punches in its criticism of this publication for
its Summer Hiatus. Seamus, a former SNN employee and WeBBsights
reporter, also managed to follow in WeBBsights' tradition by pirating
the "Personality Focus" section and renaming it "Interviews," just as WeBBsights
Associate Editor Lary Garfield copied Personality Focus frm his school's
newspaper and didn't even bother to rename it. (As a side note, SNN
Headline News editor Mark Wilson managed to scoop AotW by publishing
the first-ever interview granted by multimillionare recluse Mike Ballway.)
SNN welcomes its new competition, and promises not to be biased in its
treatment and coverage of this upstart would-be newsletter and its childish,
petty Editor.
MicroNews
by MicroMachinesGuy, SNN Society Editor (if
it doesn't say "SNN," it's not the real thing.)
The Internet Department has released a new template for all "official"
pages on the STF server. All Fleet pages and Departmental pages are
now required to conform to the new standard, more or less, however, Fleet
MOTDs, Ship Pages, and non-governmental pages are exempt. The new
policy accompanied a new starfield background image for all STF pages,
as well as a redesigned login screen.
#Star-Fleet, the STF chat room on DALnet, now has an official
web page. It includes methods of connecting to the chat room,
as well as general rules of conduct and a notice that bugging IDir Nick
Oven for OP status will get you nowhere.
On 29 September, FComm-4 Larry Garfield, convinced that a complete
breakdown of the crew rosters was needed for a debate in the President's
Office regarding multiple characters, took a complete inventory of STF's
membership and active characters. His report is posted in the Prez's
Office Topic in the OOC Fleet, and the complete spreadsheet he used is
available by e-mail
reqest in Excel 97 format.
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