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Would the real Mike B. please step forward?
by Larry Garfield and Mike Ballway, Lovers of All Things Historic
USS DRESDEN, FLEET THREE -- Back in the early days of STF, there was only one purpose to life:  Make fun of the 90210 fans on Prodigy.  Back in this Dark Age, STF as we know it had yet to exist.  Even its predecessor, ST, had yet to come into being.  It would take a great deal of mass mailings, trouble-making, and politicking before the Prodigy Administration allowed the creation of ST, the first and largest Star Trek fan club on Prodigy.  That massive undertaking was organized by one man, Michael S. DeGraw-Bertsch, known to STF as simply "Mike Bertsch."  "I was sort of the liason," he told SNN.  "Mostly we just begged & posted bunches of notes & sent some e-mails saying, basically, 'PLEASE!'"  After much prodding and poking, ST was established, the club that would grow into STF a year later.  Many people would ask why Bertsch ended up as the organizer and rabble-rouser of the early days.  In the simplest terms, he was the last person to step backwards.  "There was no one else there to lead the club so I just stepped into the position . . . I just started giving orders and people listened.  There was a need for someone to take charge of everything, so I did."  Being President then was a far cry from the difficult tast it is today.  Today, the President is charged with enormous administrative duties as well as the regular and consistant crises and fights that he is called upon to resove.  "I organized the club and got people united together for the common cause of getting our own topic," Bertsch said.  "[I] [i]roned out small disputes & such, but mostly brought everybody together."  Bertsch was forced to leave the fledgling STF in September 1991, when he lost access to Prodigy.  Franco Torres (who also returned to STF via the WeBB, around a year ago) took over Bertsch's position as Fleet Admiral.  Bertsch later revisited STF early in its role-playing era, but didn't stay long. 

Bertsch still uncertain about his future
by Larry Garfield, Fortune Teller
DUNSTABLE, MASSACHUSETTS -- Mike Bertsch was only 13 when he began to help form STF.  While browsing Prodigy for items of interest, he began talking with other Star Trek fans, until interest grew to the point that a Trek topic was logical.  Bertsch was never much of a role-player himself, and has decided to forego a character, despite his initial position on the USS Dresden.  Not that he disapproves of the RPG-orientation of the modern STF.  He simply has no ties to the current membership.  Bertsch, 19, is currently a student at Rose-Hulman Institute of Technology in Terre Haute, Indiana, and is studying to become an Emergency Medical Technician, or "Ambulance Dude" as he refers to it.  Bertsch is uncertain if he will remain in STF, as his studies currently take up a great deal of time. 

Welcome back home, Prodigy exiles
A WeBBsights EDITORIAL
When the WeBB opened, the only former President of STF to be a member was then President Greg Hertzsch, who ruled with an iron hand . . . over about 20 people.  Back then, numerous people resigned from STF not just becuase they cound't find the time -- not just because they didn't like STF -- but many unwillingly resigned becuase they were forced, by parents usually, to terminate their subscriptions to the Prodigy online service.  Now, only 16 months later, STF President Mike Bourdaa leads a club of over 200 RPers, among whom are a sizeable number of Prodigy alumni.  A great many of those who have came back to enjoy STF for the second time were the greats of our club's history:  Randy McCullick, Franco Torres, and Jerry Phelps, former Presidents; and now STF's first great leader, Mike Bertsch.  Although not all of them have stayed, it speaks of the great power of the Web and the Internet.  Even non-leaders have returned.  A few issues back [WeBBsights #8] we convered the large number of old-timers returning to STF, and the number continues to grow.  One of the early concerns about the WeBB, back in its early days of mid-1997, was that its new members would be isolated from the rich tradition that STF had developed on the Prodigy online service.  Thankfully, in recent months the very rapid expansion that once appeared to threaten STF's tradition now bolsters it, by allowing such former luminaries as Bertsch to return.  As we celebrate Fmr. FAdm. Bertsch's return, we can also celebrate the inclusiveness of the WeBB -- that nobody must resign from STF now simply becuase he changes ISPs. 

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Joker traded; GWF now playing with a full deck 
by Mike Ballway, "Mister Fleet Two" Himself
STARBASE 93, OMEGA QUETZIA -- Since our last update, so very much has happened in the double-crossing, thrill-a-minute personnel soap opera that is our Second Fleet.  First of all, the Trinitron was stripped of its Flagship status, leaving then-CO Seamus Hughes to start a futile protest that until recently marred the otherwise-acceptable Trin MOTD.  Then, Capt. Hughes himself (newly emboldened by a promotion) decided to up and move himself to Fleet Six (The "Nickname?  We don't need no steenkin' nickname!" Fleet), swapping positions with Futura CO Adam St. Clair. Also somewhere in there is Matt Davy's promotion to XO Trin.  Today, Mike Ballway and Mark Wilson head the USS Constellation; St. Clair and Davy run the Trinitron; and Mark Longanbach and Bill Gunty give the orders on the Nautilus.  No changes are expected.  Bottom line:  What began as a royal flush (two resignations an an AWOL, affecting two XOs and an AFComm/CO) turned into a madcap game of Go Fish, resulting in the hiring of a Joker (Capt. Hughes), who went wild, but when the chips fell, Fleet Two was back with a stronger hand than ever before. 

Ex-member proves tantrums don't work
by Larry Garfield, Who Would Like For Once Not to Have to Write About a Scandal.
STF HQ, SAN FRANCISCO -- STF was hit with another minor crisis on Monday, 16 November, when Mike Smith-Whiteside, who had been serving as GMT (GameMaster Trainee) on the USS Futura, was removed from his position by GMDir Deanne Morgan, due to the fact that he had been lackadaisical in his duties.  Smith-Whiteside e-mailed the entire STF Cabinet on Wednesday, 18 November to protest his removal, and to call for Morgan's removal as GMDir.  This was despite the fact that proper procedure only required him to contact the Prez, VP, and his FComm.  STF President Mike Bourdaa declared this to be spamming, which under Edict #2 is grounds for being kicked out of the club, and deleted his account.  Smith-Whiteside immediately mailed the Cabinet again, this time with what was in his own words a "declaration of war."  He stated his intent to not only attack STF himself but to e-mail every other member to try and start a boycott of the WeBB.  His Real Life friend Shawn Harrell, who served with Smith-Whiteside on the USS Alliance, declared his intent to protest Smith-Whiteside's removal by refusing to post during the next mission.  He was informed by CO Larry Garfield that he had that right, and would be marked AWOL just like anyone else, and he has since returned to activity.  In order to avoid any further escalation of the conflict, as such e-mailings on Smith-Whiteside's part would be under US law misdemeanor harassment, Garfield also contacted the computer administrator of the school district Smith-Whiteside attended.  Smith-Whiteside had previously stated that he had computer access primarily through his school.  The administrator responded on 20 November that she would speak to Smith-Whiteside about his actions.  No word has been heard from Smith-Whiteside since that time, and he is presumed banned from the computer lab. 

STF celebrates the holidays with OOC goofiness
by Mike Ballway, OOC Junkie
WEBB OOC AREA, RISA -- Following the nearly-unqualified success of the McParty VI in August, numerous attempts at rekindling the WeBB OOC Area (shared by all five WeBB Fleets, plus the Command "Fleet") have been tried.  A late-October "Halloween Party" -- direct descendant of the old STNG Halloween Party on Prodigy -- was opened by Vice-President Randy McCullick, yet even the imaginative "Come Dressed as Your Favorite FComm" theme failed to attract new visitors.  Currently President Mike Bourdaa and AFComm-6 Seamus Hughes are spearheading a Winter Celebration (non-religious), but their snowball fight has been overshadowed by some other very captivating topics.  For example, there's the Annoying Quote subject, in which South Park and Babyon 5 seem to dominate, but the real story this month lies in the Battle of the Series, a series of battles being fought out right now among a veritable Who's Who of STFers.  Everyone from Mike Bourdaa to Jeremy Friedman (hi, Jeremy!) is putting in his two cents.  Jacob Seime kicked it all off on 13 December with the $64,000 question of the last two decades: "Who would win, Star Trek or Star Wars?"  The answers came in quickly:  Star Trek, say some; Star Wars, say others; and the real bright bulbs opt for Babylon 5.  Then there are the philosophers who will tell you that you can't compare them, but these are just spoilsports.  No word yet on who would support Battlestar Galactica in such a contest.  In any event, as STF heads into 1999, at least we've got plenty of contention and -- at last, we were worried for a minute there -- an active OOC. 

Romancing the Captain
by Deanne Morgan, Er, I Don't Know What It Means Either, Go Ask Your Mother
USS HOPPER, FLEET THREE -- Time was running out quickly.  Indigo Montoya, counselor aboard the USS Hopper, found herself the bait in a Cardassian trap to kidnap Hopper CO and fellow Bajoran, Commodore Kavox Cox.  Her usefulness depleted, she was scheduled for termination by morning's light.  Desperate, the duo struggled to form a plan and then Indigo spotted a possible escape. Knowing they were being watched, Kavox thwarted the prying eyes by planting a long kiss on Indigo, all the while examining their exit.  The ploy worked and the officers escaped.  It also reawakened Indigo's unrequited feelings for Kavox; feelings she harbored for two decades. 

While Indigo's story may not be that farfetched in the real world -- people get crushes on others all the time and they can easily last months or years -- in STF, it's the rarest commodity.  In fact, in STF, people don't date:  They go from polite strangers to intimate soulmates in 1.2 posts!  In an effort to understand this phenomenon, WeBBsights explores the region of STF that gets swept under the rug by some while driving others to blow up various ship parts.  In a special presentation, the first of a series, SNN will be taking a long, hard look at Romance and Lust, Starfleet style -- in this week's Features & Columns section. 

Monty loses another Bridge; warp also disabled 
by Mike Ballway, USS Montgomery Crewer
USS MONTGOMERY, FLEET FOUR -- In yet another tale of gruesome disregard for engineers' hours of hard work, tempered only in the slightest by attention to tradition and a destructive sense of humor, the USS Montgomery, Fleet Four's Trafalgar-Class Tactical Destroyer, lost another Bridge on 14 December.  By aXO Larry Garfield's count (FCpt. Garfield has had a character on the Monty since it was commissioned), this is the fifth Monty Bridge to be destroyed.  In this case, the Bridge was auto-destructed from a remote transmitter, to keep a Romulan special-ops team from taking over the Montgomery.  In a related story, acting CE Zib Bee, facing heavy fire from Romulan infiltrators in Main Engineering, ordered a warp core shutdown and has flooded the area with coolant.  This latest wave of destruction marks the fifth Bridge and second warp core to be damaged.  Other damages the Montgomery has suffered over its one-and-one-half year of operation include, but are not limited to:  a Ready Room, an Auxillary Control Room, a crash landing, an Observation Lounge, two warp nacelles, one whole deck (14), and a pair of fuzzy dice.  In related news this is the first bridge that has been destroyed by GM Colin Wyers.  At present , Wyers is credited with one bridge, Jeff Field with one bridge, Andrew Zbikowski with one bridge, and Larry Garfield with two.  The Monty is generally recognized as the most-cursed ship in STF. 

Epic struggle finally told blow-by-blow
by Mike Ballway, Blue Jello partisan and Bob Costas Wanna-Be
#STAR-FLEET, IRC -- As you may have ascertained from reading inferior publications, on 15 November there was all-out warfare on the ID's #Star-Fleet channel.  It was, by all accounts, the first time ever that such an event had happened on IRC.  It made the WeBB OOC Jello Wars look tame:  "Oh man! You guys do not know how much I missed this since I left *P[rodigy]," said Randy McCullick, one of the participants.  Now, you can read it as it was intended to be read:  In full play-by-play.
 

Novaroma sees Sisko in Jello conflict
by Mike Ballway, WeBBsights Siskoism Correspondent and Pope of the Siskoist Church
SISKO TEMPLE, NOVAROMA VII -- The Church of Sisko released a press document today in which it addressed the all-out Jello War that erupted last month.  After meeting in conclave for the last four weeks, the Sisko Bishops released a Church statement that bears the seal of Pope Mike II, who has been brought out of retirement to serve for a second time as Supreme Pontiff of STF's biggest religion.  The encyclical points to the appearance of Blue Jello Sisko and, in a much-debated provision, labeled this War as a Holy Crusade of Siskoism, as well as proof of Sisko's existence.  "Let the story of this War forever be part of Sisko canon," said Adam Cardinal Kent, Archbishop of Fleet One, speaking for the Pontiff.  "From this point forward, the Holy Church of Sisko will look back on 15 November as a day when Siskoism and right triumphed over infidels." 

MicroNews
by Peter Peterson, SNN Janitor

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Jason, 15, is currently a high school student and activist for the Kick-da-Seamus Olympic Event [don't we all wish the IOC were more sympathetic to that cause, Jason? --Ed.]. 

PART 1 OF AN SNN SPECIAL REPORT
Romance and Lust, Starfleet style 
by Deanne Morgan, STF Romantic and Sexual Expert
USS CONCORDE, FLEET THREE -- If one is going to address lust, the most logical starting point in STF is with the Deltan officers.  As most STFers may recall from Star Trek: The Motion Picture, the bald Deltans are blessed (cursed?) with a sexual chemistry that drives humans mad with desire.  Lt. Cmdr. Neisha Lykul, CMO aboard the USS Concorde, thwarts her physiological tendancies by injected herself every twelve hours with a pheromone blocker that inhibits her chemical attractiveness.  This medical wonder works fine 98% of the time.  But if Lykul isn't able to get to her blocker on schedule, it wreaks absolute havoc. 

Take, for instance, a situation not too long ago that found Lykul and Concorde CO Paul Ferris trapped together while aliens tore apart the ship.  A few hours after her blocker wore off and the ship wasn't the only thing being ravaged.  To compound the problem, Lykul is half Betazoid.  She feels the passion ignited in others and responds to it with an intensity of her own. 

While still coming to terms with the incident with the captain, and the subsequent pregnancy, Lykul found herself in a similar situation with the ship's counselor.  The counselor's pre-existing lust for the CMO and his own telepathic awareness made their coupling harder for Lykul to get over. 

Eventually, both the counselor and the captain departed the Concorde, and Lykul is contemplating life as a nun.  Meanwhile, her half-Deltan compatriot on the USS Genesis fares much better.  XO Zipakna bears the unique genetics of a Romulan/Deltan hybrid.  While his pheromone secretion is as potent as Lykul's, his Vulcanoid mind makes it possible for him to control it at will. 

This hasn't prevented the good Commander from having a torrid affair with the ship's CO, however. When he served undercover as the Genny's counselor, Captain T'Nira barely noticed him.  But once Starfleet made him her new executive officer, it was mere hours before the couple was horizontal in the captain's quarters.  Sex led to intense affection between the two officers -- if not true love.  If they ever get off the holodeck, they may yet get a chance to see if it's the real thing or not. 

Do Deltans corner the market on lust in STF?  No.  And you may be surprised who shares the intense passion.  Be sure to drop by next issue when we continue our voyeuristic exploration of Romance and lust, Starfleet style. 

RPG: RANDOM PLOT GEMS
IDIC, the STF dogma
by Deanne Morgan with Larry Garfield
SNN CENTER, CHICAGO -- Infinite Diversity in Infinite Combinations.  Although the creation of the Vulcan IDIC philosophy was merely a marketing gimmick, the message behind it is a powerful one.  No, no, not that you can make a fortune selling a cheap piece of sci-fi looking jewelry for $19.95.  I'm addressing the actual mindset of acceptance that IDIC represents.  A look at some of the characters that populate our Star-Fleet universe gives you a good example of some of those diverse combinations. 
 

In many ways, STF is that cookbook.  It contains recipies for ships and RPGs, but in the end it is the quality of the ingredience, the STF membership, that makes the club great.  The 245 people who give their time to this vast international organization are the embodyment of the IDIC.  Each ship posseses a different combination of people, infinitely diverse.  Few TV executives would ever have expected a marketing ploy to become the driving force of hundreds of fans and an entire nation, but it has. 

Have news of your own?  WeBBsights welcomes any contributions to RPG from its readers.  Send your RPG articles to SNN Associate Editor Larry Garfield. 

STF TRIVIA
Winner to receive a cookie
by Larry Garfield, SNN Trivia Master
SNN CENTER, CHICAGO -- That's right, folks!  Those weirdos at SNN Center have pulled together a list of facts you are supposed to know about STF, but probably don't.  Do you know the answers?  If so, e-mail them to Associate Editor Larry Garfield. 

1. Which current STF member has the longest Roster Name?  (Hint:  It's listed in Larry Garfield's Roster Report)
2. What is the oldest currently-serving ship in STF, in terms of continuous service?
3. What is the oldest currently-serving ship in STF, in terms of initial launch date?
4. Of all the ship classes in the ED, which was the first to be approved?

So where was I again?  Of course.  Something contentious. 

All of these oldtimers coming back these days [see Headline Story --Ed.] reminds me of the days when STF had a constitution.  This is 1993 we're talking about, not just a few years ago.  The constitution we had then has now been lost, and STF operates on common law (the Presidential Edicts) and tradition nowadays.  Which is why it's so important for us to have capable people in charge of the club. 

However, if we ever elect a bad President -- or if our President ever appoints a bad FComm -- or if our FComms ever appoint a bad CO -- we'll need a good defense.  A defense of law, and a law that is above modification.  In 1996, eyeing the problem that lack of a constitution had brought STF -- three Acting Presidents in six months -- Randy McCullick and I began work on an STF Charter.  A year and a half later, I resurrected the forgotten Charter and completely modified it, eventually presenting it to STF as The Articles of Organization. 

The AO had some problems.  Now, with many of those problems fixed, it returns as AO Draft Three, a revision edited exclusively by STF legal scholar [Pah! --Ed.] Larry Garfield.  Sure, it's not perfect.  Nothing's ever perfect on its third draft.  But the AO, as it currently stands, is closer to perfection than any other constitution STF's ever considered.  As the volume turns up on the ratification debate in Starfleet Command, make sure you know what's going on by taking a look at the Articles. 

Knowing what's in the Articles isn't enough, though.  If you have the time, please trek on down to the Starfleet Command Area to discuss the AO with its authors and the leadership of the club.  Every new voice makes the AO a better document. 

STF needs a constitution, and with your help we could have the Articles of Organization implemented in time for the February election.  Please do your part and help out.