: Posted by Ensign Vora Zorell (Sci) in Holodeck- Zorell
: : Posted by Lt. Cmdr. Ardana Hobb (CNS) in Holodeck- Zorell
: : : Posted by Ensign Vora Zorell (Sci) in Holodeck- Zorell
: <snip>
: : : Vora returned her gaze to the snapshot of herself before that almost unbearable rehab. "I don't know what to tell her," she replied honestly. "I've tried so hard to just let things go and pretend that they don't haunt my dreams and my memories." She felt like she was standing on a precipice and barely anything at all would tip her over. "How do you push past something that you can't ever remember in less detail! People talk about time making things better, that the hurts become less, but they don't for me!" She ran her hands through her wild cherry hair, almost frantically as if she wanted to dig into her brain and take all the memories out.
: : :
: : : She stepped up even closer to the other Vora, her lips trembling. "Every needle that has punctured my skin, every hand that drew itself over my body, every pang of hunger… everything. It's too much! It overwhelms what few happy memories and thoughts I have. And if I tried to focus on the more happy ones I think I'd get lost in them."
: : :
: : : Ensign Zorell, Sciences
: :
: : Ardana sighed sympathically and said in a soft voice "Vora, I'll let you in on a secret. It is past and doesn't exist anymore, just like the future doesn't yet exist. Potentially it could have no influence on you whatsoever, you could be totally free of it, since it doesn't exist anymore. The only reason that things like that from our past haunt us in the now, is because some emotion that we have, keeps pulling that past into the present. in most cases that is guilt. In others it is the great anger of injustice. In order to be free, you need to identify which emotion in you ties your past to you now. And then we can try to dissolve it."
: :
: : - Ardana Hobb
:
: But it did exist! How could she explain? How could anyone understand just how visceral the memories were? Vora turned and stared at Hobb with a helpless expression. She had no clue which emotion it was. It could be either really. "How do I figure that out?" she asked almost desperately.
:
: Ensign Zorell, Sciences

Ardana smiled. "With time. A realisation like this can not be forced or conjured. It comes to you when the time is right, when you want it. Even I can't change the fact, but I will be there for you when it does come and then we can make the next step. Rest assured Vora, as long as you want to be free, and as long as you are willing to face your fears that might very well be attached to those emotions, you will achieve it." she said intently.

- Ardana Hobb