Posted Sept. 11, 2021, 8:26 a.m. by Commander Shara Calloway (Chief Intelligence Officer) (Lindsay B)
Posted by Civilian Micah Pikelsimer (Federation Security Agent) in Pikelsimer’s Quarters- Marriage Woes
Posted by Commander Shara Calloway (Chief Intelligence Officer) in Pikelsimer’s Quarters- Marriage Woes
Posted by Civilian Micah Pikelsimer (Federation Security Agent) in Pikelsimer’s Quarters- Marriage Woes
Posted by… suppressed (1) by the Post Ghost! 👻
(snip)
Air slipped in, staccato sounds echoing in her own ears and as she pushed air out, her whole body trembled. Head bowed, Shara had closed her eyes, shutting out that bit of sensory input that was too much right now. The memories sat there like little balloons hovering above her and she wanted to push them away or even pop them, but she knew that wasn’t the answer. “I don’t.... know.. how to… do this…” she gasped, forcing herself to draw in an even deeper breath, but it was forced it was almost painful.
~Shara
“Yeah you do, love… yeah you do… just go with it. You know fighting it won’t help… just roll with the punches, hun… breathe… easy… I know this is hard as hell, and I’m so sorry, Sha. But it’s gotta be done. And when it is, we’ll go back home for a few weeks and you can play your piano. Maybe we can get the kids there… never know. Just ease through it, doll. Its gonna be alright…”
Micah
Micah was one of the few people she could ever bring herself to break down like this in front of, and maybe that in part was her answer. He was here. Who knew if they’d make it through this, but at least for the moment he was here with her. Shifting her weight forward, Shara all but collapsed against her, breaths ragged and cheeks damp. The panic shifted slightly and she sobbed more. What was with her and crying lately? She swore she’d cried more in the last few months than she had her entire life.
And maybe that was the point.
Pulling her left shoulder inwards, she was nestled against Micah so he was all but cradling her and for the time being it was enough. But the words slipped out, “I’ve missed you. I’d gotten used to sleeping beside you.”
~Shara
Micah held her close and smiled. “Of course you have… we’re married, after all.” and he chuckled. “But it’s nice to know you noticed I wasn’t there. I’ll be honest… I figured you’d have been sprawled out all over your bed relishing not having my butt encroaching on your side. And me yanking the covers back when I got cold because someone is a blanket hog.” and he chuckled.
Micah
There was still pressure in her chest, but her breathing had evened out the longer he held her. “I’ve been having the nightmares every night,” she said quietly. “I’m tired, Pickle. And I know it’s a part of why I was even in a place to have a flashback. But… I worry about what happens if I’m triggered n this mission. That I’ll get someone or myself killed by a moment of inattentiveness. When I say I don’t know how to do this, that what I mean, that’s where my fear is. We don’t have the time for me to go back and do all the therapy I need to. I need to be ready now,” she said, her torment evident even to her own ears.
~Shara
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