Posted by Civilian Revna Edman (Diplomatic Attache) in Bittersweet Beginnings
It had been six months since her surgery, almost a year longer than that since she’d been injured. Three months in rehab onboard the Centurion. It had been cathartic and healing. This time Jameson had been on her from the moment she woke up to follow the treatment protocol. A week after the surgery he walked into her recovery room and pulled up a stool and sat down. “Revna, I love you like a little sister. So we need to have a long talk. I, more than anyone else on this ship, knows you. Except your sister. And she and I have been talking.” Revna raised a brow that quickly dropped when Runa walked in. Runa took her sister’s hand and squeezed. “Jameson has been keeping this for years for you. I would have thought you would have watched it by now.”

---

Revna sat in the chair they had brought into the holosuite and looked at Runa. Her sister was going to stay with her. Runa waited, she could turn the program on, but Revna needed to do this. “Computer run program Mattsen 1.” The holodeck changed in a flash. Revna and Runa were situated in a very tight space behind the pilot of a fighter shuttle. Sandy brown hair, cut and trimmed tight covered the head of the fighter in the seat. Outside the viewport was like the Fourth of July with the colors and explosions, but this was no celebration, it was a nightmare of broken ships, bodies, massive Breen war ships and the Earth defense fleet like flies annoying a horse.

“Computer begin recording….Revna, baby, I’m not going to make it.” A testament to the skill of the pilot he continued to fly, evade, and shoot as he spoke. “Rev, I know you. You’ll mourn me, and I really hope you do. I hope that I meant so much to you that you never forget me, that I live on in your memory. But I do not want you to live your life with a dead man. I want you to mourn, scream your rage to heavens, Babe, but don’t live with death. And don’t join Star Fleet. I don’t regret it, but it wasn’t your dream, it was mine. You need to find your dream, a new one, and live it, let it fill your life with light and laughter and struggle, but live honey.” The fighter rocked, sparks flying, plasma conduits venting inside the cabin. “I love you Revna Freya Edman, don’t ever forget that.” The ship rocked again, alarms and explosions indicated an engine explosion and the computer “Life support failure in 30 seconds.” “Revna, send a Valkyrie for me, okay.” And the pilot pulled a knife from his boot, aimed the fighter at an engine nacelle of a Breen ship….and then the whole program disappeared in a flash of light, smoke, and the scream of metal tearing itself apart.

She’d talked to Mike every week. She had opened the bottle of bourbon while on the comm with him, so he could see how well her new lungs worked. There was a lot of coughing and a burn that spread down her throat and into her nose, and a lot of laughter. She’d talked to him about everything. How she wanted to leave Star Fleet, find something she loved to do that was wholly her own, find a new life. She made plans to go to Earth with him and see the dive bar, sail a schooner, even visit one of his other bars. And then…

It started three months ago. Revna had called her sister, Runa, not so unusual until she asked how Mike was. Revna talked to Mike every week, she’d know better than Runa. Runa had thought that maybe Mike had said something to make Revna worry. Nope, not at all. They’d fought and now they weren’t talking. And now everytime Runa went to the bar or really anywhere on Atlantis she was being stopped by Mike wanting to know how Revna was. Runa felt like she was back in highschool. But now she was playing Revna’s part instead of the other way around.

Revna missed him. It was an ache that didn’t stop. Revna had confided in her sister, she didn’t understand, Revna had talked to Mike, she’d told him about wanting to leave Star Fleet. She was never supposed to be an officer. That had been Shauwn’s dream. Those first years after he’d died, she joined, without a plan for herself. She hadn’t known how to be Revna without Shauwn and had joined because that had been his dream. She asked Mike if he wanted her to come back, but Revna had been offered this great opportunity to work for the Federation Diplomatic Corp as an ambassador to the Delta quadrant. She wanted him to say ‘Come back and be with me.’ and he wanted her to finally find her own road, but neither said that to the other, and so now their stubbornness had created hurt feelings and they were both miserable.

Revna stood at the window in the forward lounge and watched as the ship entered the wormhole. It was a sight she’d never seen before and it was something to behold. And people said there were no gods. She brushed aside the scientific arguments for and against such things and just watched. She really didn’t know how long it took to get through the wormhole, and didn’t matter. Suddenly space returned to normal, but the stars were different, it was immediately apparent to her. She was as far from home and family as she’d ever been, and she was suddenly very lonely. The ship turned a slow arc and Event Horizon Station came into view. A new beginning. She nodded to herself and headed out of the lounge and towards her quarters.

---

Revna entered the main door to the Ambassador Hotel. She barely registered the courtesies but she responded appropriately. She showed her credentials to the man behind the desk and then made her way to her room. Her bags and trunks were already there. She didn’t bother with them, they would be transferred to Manhattan when it docked in two days. She threw herself down on the bed and stared at the ceiling. She laid there until her stomach made it clear that she was hungry. The counselor in herself prodded and annoyed until she got up. She was a representative of the Federation now, on a much larger scale than she ever had before. She opened one trunk and pulled out a deep blue dress, edged in gold and copper with a gentle scoop neckline. The sides laced and cinched on both sides. She looked in the mirror, it was strange to wear this dress and not see the scars on her chest, but she took a deep, life affirming, breath. She fixed the braids in her hair, beads and all, and then pinned it up out of the way. The commbadge she’d been issued she wore attached to the long cloth belt at her waist. She left the room, and a few minutes later she was sitting at a table in the bar. “Can I get you a drink ma’am?” Revna smiled at the young waitress, a species she’d never encountered before. “Only if you have something worth drinking behind your bar.”
Revna Edman, Diplomatic Attaché

The woman, a Mylean, smiled a friendly smile and said “I think that can be arranged, Ma’am.” and she walked to the bar. As she did, the lights dimmed and the spotlight came on directed at the small stage in the back of the hotel bar.

A male Quarren stood illuminated in the light and he smiled a broad smile. “Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Eclipse Bar in the quadrant-famous Ambassador Hotel. I would like to extend a special welcome to all of our guests -” and it seemed he smiled and looked directly at Revna, “- and qish you all a wonderful evening. I am your host, D’ret. Now… sit back… relax… have a drink or three.” and there was a soft chuckle through the place. “Tonight, the Eclipse takes you billions and billions of miles away… but with a guide many of you know well. Enjoy.” and the lights went out and there was silence.

Then… music. A piano… then soft drums. The music swelled slowly until a voice began to sing as a drink was set in front of her in the dark:

Love I get so lost sometimes
Days pass and this emptiness fills my heart
When I want to run away I drive off in my car
But whichever way I go
I come back to the place you are
All my instincts, they return
The grand facade, so soon will burn
Without a noise, without my pride
I reach out from the inside

The lights snapped on. There, on the stage was a band. Three figures played. One, a guitar. The second, the drums. And the third… a large human man… played the piano and sang into an old-fashioned microphone…

Micheal ‘Big Mike’ McKenzie.

He turned his head as he sang and played, looking straight at Revna. And there, on the table in front of her, was the black velvet bag, her note… unopened… still attached. The bottle was out and on the table and there were two glasses, one full and one empty.

In your eyes
The light, the heat (in your eyes)
I am complete (in your eyes)
I see the doorway (in your eyes)
To a thousand churches (in your eyes)
The resolution (in your eyes)
Of all the fruitless searches (in your eyes)
Oh, I see the light and the heat (in your eyes)
Oh, I wanna be that complete
I wanna touch the light, the heat I see in your eyes

His eyes closed, and the pure emotion of the words he sang came through.

Around her, more tha few people gasped and whispered ‘Oh my God! Thats Mike McKenzie!”, “Is this a new song?”, and “Is he coming out of retirement?” excitedly.

Love, I don’t like to see so much pain
So much wasted and this moment keeps slipping away
I get so tired working so hard for our survival
I look to the time with you to keep me awake and alive
And all my instincts they return
And the grand facade, so soon will burn
Without a noise, without my pride
I reach out from the inside

In your eyes (your eyes, your eyes)
In your eyes
In your eyes
The light, the heat (in your eyes)
I am complete (in your eyes)
I see the doorway
To a thousand churches (in your eyes)
The resolution (in your eyes)
Of all the fruitless searches
Oh, I see the light and the heat (in your eyes)
Oh, I wanna be that complete (in your eyes)
I wanna touch the light, the heat I see in your eyes
In your eyes
In your eyes
In your eyes
In your eyes (in your eyes)

The music continued for a few moments longer and then faded away. The crowd erupted into applause and many, many pictures were being taken…

The band waved and took a bow..

Mike just looked at Revna, a smile on his face.

Big Mike (With Special Thanks to Peter Gabriel)