Posted Jan. 7, 2019, 1:50 p.m. by River Styxx (Marine) (Nathan Derricutt)
Posted by Commander Heathcliff Rinker (Counselor) in Alt Timeline: CNS’s office River boarding eval
Posted by River Styxx (Marine) in Alt Timeline: CNS’s office River boarding eval
Posted by Commander Heathcliff Rinker (Counselor) in Alt Timeline: CNS’s office River boarding eval
Posted by… suppressed (19) by the Post Ghost! 👻
River stood outside the counselor office, she didn’t like counselors. All they did was invade your privacy and get in the way. More often then not they where a hazard rather then a help, either getting themselves killed or others. At least that was what River believed anyway. She also knew that they would probably worry about her attitude towards people and what she did on her last assignment. She had been cleared but she knew Counselors where very good at digging to far in. They would probably ask her loads of questions about the horrors she witnessed on Acheron.She just hoped that they would get those question out of the way first. So they would stop bugging her about it.
Finally she took a breathe and rang the Chime Here we go. she thought to herself as she waited to be let in.
River Styxx (Marine)
<BUMP> for CNS Again
I’m the blindest player ever… sorry
“Come,” Came the response from the Counselor.
Rinker’s office was lived in. There were a number of knick knacks that spoke to his personality, a number of bound books on a shelf, each one had a little portable force field that kept them protected from the elements. There were the prerequisite degree framed behind a dark desk, one in psychology and other in psychiatry. Rinker also had a very comfortable appearing chair that he had slightly reclined.
“Good Morning,” He paused as he looked at the uniform. “Marine.” Please take a seat. There were three clear options to sit.. the first directly before the desk, an uncomfortable looking wooden chair. To one side of the room was a couch with a little coffee table before it, and on the opposite side of the room a comfortable looking rolling chair.
Rinker
OOC: It’s ok we all miss stuff.
IC: typical, cushy office for a cushy job River thought to herself as she walked into the office . “Morning” she said with a nod of the head as she took a seat on the wooden Chair. River was not used to luxuries she hadn’t had many of them all her life, especially on her last assignment. So an uncomfortable chair was of no consequence to her. She figured the three seating options where a test. An easy to see test if it was one, but a test all the same.
River Styxx (Marine)
<BUMP>
“Morning?” Rinker kicked his feet up the corner of the desk with his chair reclining slightly as he did so. He pursed his lips, her response lacked any honorific which seemed counter to her demeanor. “So… what can I do you for?” His pursed lips changed into a slight smirk.
Rinker
“I have been booked in for an evaluation. I’m new to the ship. so even though i have been recently evaled and cleared. I have to go through it all again.” River said simply. “So what i want from you is to get my eval done” she said simply
River Styxx (Marine)
“That must be frustrating,” Rinker didn’t seem too empathetic, “To think you are done with something and then have to do it all over again.”
“Perhaps we can look at this like just a conversations between people who have to work together. Tell me a few things that are important for me to know about you to work well with you.”
Rinker
“I expect everyone to pull their weight and do what they are supposed to. To be ready to react at a moments notice. If everyone does a good job and are useful, then things will run smoothly. I don’t tolerate time wasters, people who only do half the job, complainers, whiners and those that poke around where their shouldn’t.” River said simply.
“If people stay out of my way and let me do my job, follow my orders and do as their told, then i have no issue with them. ” she added.
River Styxx (Marine)
“That sounds, to me, unyielding, insensitive, presumptuous, and frankly more than a little angry. So much of the former as to be intentional. Are you trying to sound more difficult than you actually are… and if so why?” Rinker hadn’t removed his feet from the edge of his desk what he did do was stare at the Marine with inscrutable eyes.
Rinker
“It’s the way I’ve learnt to be. I haven’t long come back from a place many would call hell. I’ve fought and seen horrors that God himself would shrink away from. I learnt that i had to be demanding and unyielding. I wasn’t to begin with and many died. then i started to change may attitude to the way it is now and i started winning. the way i am has kept my self and many others alive. ” River said her voice tinted with genuine emotion, not anger or hated but something else.
Interesting Rinker thought. Hard, but not closed… rare. “Coincidence, isn’t causation… but I understand your logic.”
“My compassion has cost me more then enough. being close to others has cost me enough. The way i am keeps people away, keeps them in line and keeps them thinking on the job. which is good. it means that if i go down they won’t get themselves killed trying to save me. they will continue to so their jobs. How many people do you think would get killed or wounded trying to save you counselor? if you where wounded in the middle of a kill zone? Being harsh and unyielding keeps people away thus keeping them safer. Their emotions don’t cloud their judgment and that keeps them alive.” she added it was clear that River tough and unyielding exterior was a way to keep people safe and away. At least that was what River thought.
River Styxx (Marine)
“I’d certainly hope no one, but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t want anyone to want to risk themselves for me.” Rinker pursed his lips. “But my wishes shouldn’t be yours… or be permission to feel one way or another. This is about you.”
“Isn’t one of the marines mottoes ‘leave no one behind.’ Your ‘plan’ seems to contradict that… teamwork, loyalty, respect… Always faithful… I’m pretty sure I got most of those right… so if I have them right… what does that say about what you are doing.”
“I’m not a marine… and I rarely fight, but I when I do, I don’t fight for the uniform, or the flag, or even a superior officer… I fight for the team, my friends, and the people who fight for me…” He shrugged but still didn’t remove his feet from the corner of his desk.
Rinker
“Many would say my way of doing things goes against everything a marine should be. However those word no one left behind, where written a long time ago by idealists. It worked back then but now, not so much. we have weapons that can vaporize a person, leaving nothing behind to bring back. we have ships that can be destroyed and everyone on board is lost, again nothing to bring back. We have even faced a race that assimilate our comrades, in that instance we have no choice but to leave them behind. The galaxy is a far scarier place and not every situation gives you the chance to bring everyone back. But i pull tags and write letters to families. I bring them back if i can just not right away. ” River said looking at the counselor. She knew he could never understand the way she is and why she is the way she is. No one could.
“As for what i fight for i fight for the federation. i signed up to defend the federation and her interests. I have spent all my life looking after myself. beside everyone i fought for is dead, a shell of themselves or missing. I have the misfortune of outliving all i care about” she added after a short pause.
River Styxx (Marine)
Rinker took a deep breath as he looked at River. He pursed his lips for a moment. “Ideals are what we are River. Its what we hold on to when the odds are the greatest, or when we have the least. Your lack in faith in them reflects your lack in faith in the world… or at least I hope its your lack of faith in the world. Because the alternative is you have no faith in yourself.” He finally took his feet off his desk as he pivoted towards the Marine.
“I don’t have any magical words that will change what you believe, River, that will end your pain. That kind of change comes from within… from the same place your pain comes from. If you are as strong as I imagine, you will look to make that change yourself.. one day… I’ll be here when you need me.”
rinker
“Finally someone who gets it.” River said simply “However it is not the world that i have lost faith in. it’s the galaxy. The federation ids a beacon of hope and peace, however it has been challenged by what feels like every single other race in the galaxy. Even the Vulcans had a crack at us in the early days of star fleet. There are always those that want to destroy what peace we have.” she said simply. Rive had started to lose faith before Acheron but the things she saw there had destroyed her faith completely.
“I will continue to take fire, pull tags and bury the dead until i die in combat. As there is no way peace can exist in this galaxy. ” she added after a short pause.
River Styxx (Marine)
“Unfortunately for all of us, River, Peace is something you have to fight for. But it isn’t always something you have to die for.” Rinker looked off… “There was a General on Earth Centuries ago… he said. ‘I don’t want a man who will die for his country, I want a man who will make the other poor bastard die for his.”
Rinker
River half smiled and laughed softly “What an amusing contradiction. Fighting for peace.” she said her face turning serious again.
“As for killing my enemy you don’t have to worry about that. I intend to kill my enemy mercilessly, brutally and with no quarter. It’s worked for me so far. However i do know that some where, some time, some day there will be a bolt of super charged energy with my name on it. But until then i intend to leave a rather large pile of bodies of my enemies behind me.” she added after a short pause.
River Styxx (Marine)
“mmmhmm,” Rinker looked at her. “Morbid picture you paint.” She was a hard case, made more difficult by her intention to be so. She knew she was damaged and didn’t want to get better.... lead a horse to water and all the other quaint phrases.
“I’m fairly certain you have no great interest in spending the next hours investigating your feelings with me… I understand, despite my feelings being hurt… so I’ll offer you at trade, since I’m fairly certain you aren’t insane.”
“Tell me on real thing you would need a therapist to know about you… that would help the most… and please no evasive answers like ‘to know to leave me alone. I alwaus find those fairly insulting… like answering interview questions with ‘my weakness is I work too hard.’“
Rinker’
River scoffed “OK. I’ll tell you a story. Once there was a girl who was a solider, she had, had a hard life knowing death and sorrow since before she was five. She joined an army to find something to do. Once she was assigned to a world and charged with protecting it. While she was there she found a little girl, an orphan, like she was. she found herself over time coming to care greatly for the girl and thought about adopting her. then a terrible enemy came form the skies and attacked the world. the soldier stepped up to defend her world and to protect the girl she cared so much for.” River paused and started to stork a tattoo on her wrist it was hard to make out what it said
“Sadly during the attack the girl was struck with a poison dart and fell ill. The solider rushed the girl to the hospital where a cure was waiting. the cure failed and the girl was made worse pain racked her body and her throat was horse with pain. The little girl called out to the solider. ‘please make it stop’ ‘it hurts’ ‘make it stop’ so the soldier told the girl to hug her teddy and close her eyes to thing of happy thought. it made the little girl feel better and she started to smile. the solider knew there was no cure. So she pulled out her weapon and fired. the little girl no longer cried or hurt, she lay there as if she was asleep smiling hugging the teddy the soldier brought for her . the soldier carried the girl to a piece of land and buried her there. Placing a small cross on top. the soldier wept for minutes or hours she didn’t know. She then decided that to defeat the monsters she must become one. She began a merciless campaign and finally won. surrounded by the graves of her fellow soldiers, people and friends she made a vow to never ever let her feelings betray her and to never show mercy to those who did wrong by her. she returned to the little girls grave and placed flowers on it. she said goodbye to her, the girl who was a daughter to her and would have been if fate had not been so cruel. Then she left, for a soldiers work is never done and she knew she must fight on against all who would waste the lives of the innocent. So no one else would ever lose there family again.” river sad she hadn’t realized hat her eyes had teared up.
River Styxx (Marine)
OOC: Oops sorry i got a little carried away. Nathan
Rinker pursed his lips as he picked up a PaDD, “That must have been very difficult for the soldier.” After typing a few keys he handed it to River. “You’re cleared for duty Ms. Styxx. I’ll be here.”
Rinker
River nodded “It was. Knowing that her attempt at mercy had caused so much suffering too someone she cared deeply for. The having to kill said person. It destroyed her” She said as she got up and headed for the door.
River Styxx (Marine)
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