Some Slimy Problem - Side Sim

Posted Dec. 9, 2019, 12:31 p.m. by Fleet Captain Kelly Bordeaux (Commanding Officer) (Kate O'Neill)

Posted by Commander Jacen Drayke (Chief Engineer/2O) in Some Slimy Problem - Side Sim

Posted by Lieutenant Alexandra Robins (Xenobiologist) in Some Slimy Problem - Side Sim

“What?!” Exclaimed Kai “so we have less than 20 minutes to clean all this stuff with a simple mop?” As he sighed heavily, Kai let him fall on the slime and looked the ceiling. Why? Why the transporter? He thought. Stuff happens and now he was almost on his first day of job, with a mop, cleaning out the goo. What a first day!

=/\=Thank you Duncan and tell Lily I loved that picture she sent,=/\= Alex lied through her teeth but knew she had to be nice. After clicking off she turned to Ensign Oliver. “Okay you heard the man. We need some mops and a timer. Anyone have any idea how long we have until the next kaboom?”

Lt Lexi Robins

Clicking off the comm, Duncan paused a moment with a raised eyebrow. “She liked that picture? Huh, that woman is lying.” With a smirk, he turned back to his lab.

Lt Duncan Rhodes, CSO OP42

Kai checked the time. Beforehand he had the chance to look straight to the time on the LCARS monitor of the computer when the goo exploded: 10:34AM. Now were 10:37; not a bad time but still just 17 minutes to clean everything.
“We have less than 17 minutes guys.” Immediately he jumped on his feet and searched for the mops. Then as he saw Alexandra still stuck on the floor, he gave a hand and the mop.
“Well… not the dream day I imagined. But hey! Still some work.”

Ensign Kai O. Kingstone - Scientist

“Okay, so I say we start in one corner and work our way around the room. Maybe we can set up a force field so that as we clean a section we cordone it off. That way if there another splat it only stays in one area,” Alex grunted as she pulled her leg from the muck with Kai’s hand to balance her. If Chris was talking about the original cartoon Grinch they had one cycle to get this cleaned up. If he was talking about the movie or the newest revamp then she had more time. Either way, she needed to start. Helping Kai hand out the mops, she and he began in their small area. “So where was your last duty station,” Alex asked dropping gobs of the lime green goo into the bucket.

Lexi Robins Science

The unknown assistant was now slipping through the slimes hills and recovered what was an Ensign Jensen awake and still calling for help.
“D-duty station?” Asked as he did not knew what she meant “May I ask what you mean?” He asked while taking a huge amount of goo from a poor computer monitor and a chair.
Then, awaiting for the reply, Kai leant through a compartment and took a pocket forcefield generator and left it on a clean surface, ready to use.

Ensign Kai O. Kingstone - Scientist

“Yes, where were you before you came here,” Lexi smiled as she flicked off a large chunk of goo into her bucket. Looking around she just realized another problem. There were not going to be enough buckets to dump the goo and when it became active again it would just be tiny bombs they could move anywhere. Clean up was going to be more problematic than she expected. Her face went slack as she looked at Kai concerned. Friendly chit chat could wait until later.

“Kai,” she drew his name out a little so it sounded sing sony or like she was about to ask him for favor. “Did Duncan say anything about how long the goo is active? I know he told us we had twenty minutes between kabooms but how long is it active when it not dormant? Does it stay active until it booms? Duncan never said anything about that or did he?” Stabbing her mop into a pile of goo she explained her inner earlier thought. “So we clean this up and make buckets of goo bombs, any idea how to get rid of the buckets without contaminating the rest of the ship?”

“20 minutes he said, before it would explode again after the sleeping phase.” Kai thought “it is good for the skin if you rubbed.” Kai still thought

“It’s not a Devonian hydration mask,” Jensen looked at him with wide eyes.

“It might be one way to clean out your pores,” a fellow Ensign Roberts began to snicker finding the image of all of them slathering the goo on their hands and face and exiting the room with a dermatologists dream epidermis very hysterical. “We can bottle it and sell it at the beach,” the more Roberts followed Kai’s line of thought the funnier it became. “I like your sense of humor,” he gave a thumbs up to Kai.

“Wait what? No no no! No distractions!”
It was hard. But then after some serious thoughts (beside the funny stuff about rubbing it on the skin), he firmly said: “I guess that we will not know how much time it will take before it explodes. He…” swallowed his saliva “he didn’t told us…”

“We have three minutes and twenty-two seconds before the next,” Ensign Jensen made a small explosion noise wth his mouth calling out a time check.

“We could try some experiments with the goo,” Ensign Roberts offered leaning on his mop. “It’s not like it will make it worse. Maybe we huddle by Kai’s force field in what we call the clean zone. We run some time trials. Give it one minute, make a noise, and see if it resets. Then we clean up more and wait two minutes and so on and so on. There has to be a sweet zone from when it activates to when it blows up.”

Lexi looked at Kai. She was out of ideas and so far anything suggested she was willing to try.

Lt. Lexi Robins

He neither had any idea but liked the fact of experimenting even under stressful situations like this.
“Seems legit since we don’t know how much time after these 20 minutes we have before the explosions. I’ll set the force field right away!”
And as told he closed his bucket and went grabbing the device. Then, checking that no goo was on that corner, not even the slightest chunk he set the device down and took everyone there, leaving the bucket outside, firmly sealed and seemingly harmless.
“When you ready, I’ll activate this thing.” He pointed the button “also, let’s hope that the bucket will not act like a proton torpedo as it is sealed!”
He crossed his finger and awaited that everyone was ready.

Ensign Kai O. Kingstone - Scientist

Lexi walked up to Kai and blew a lock of hair out of her eyes. “Whenever you are ready,” she said with a smile but a concerned look. As the forcefield went up Lexi started to think about what Kai said. Proton Torpedo. As a biologist, she was all about studying the resiliency of life. What was intriguing was the use of this as a weapon. Lexi was not about killing except for one group. While it was not popular to openly state it, the Borg were a menace that needed to be dealt with. The military just upped the ante with new weapons, more powerful weapons but a simple bacteria killed upwards of 80% of populations as times. What if a simple slime mold was what defeated the Borg. The idea was intriguing.

“Ensing Roberts, run some scans on the bucket to see if it is holding up to the pressure of the goo,” Lexi ordered all of a sudden far more interested in experimenting than cleaning up. Turning to face Kai she began to explain her thought process.

“What are you doing?” Kai asked weirded “I don’t get it.” Looking at Lexi’s eyes

“So what if we could weaponize this,” Lexi told the group.

“W-What do you mean…?” He almost got a heartache as she said “weaponize”. Weaponize toward who? This slime tho? Poor goo!

“Against excema,” Jensen looked at Robins. In her opinion, the whole lot of them were crazy as loons.

“Against the Borg,” Lexi couldn’t keep the excitement out of her voice. “Think about it. They are cyborgs. Kai mentioned how hard it would be to clean up the conduit panel. Imagine getting this into places the sun don’t shine and by that, I mean the cracks and seams of their implants. Sure it goes dormant after exploding but the Borg is noisy. You always hear the servos and motors from the implants. So enough of the goo in say minute succession,”

Ohh now it was clear. Kai listening to the “weaponization plan” was almost going to laugh for how basic but efficient would have been this plane to fight the Borgs.
“Man, it would be freaking funny to see those Borg, super advanced-technomancer people, being struggling with some goo” he giggled

“Like literal minute man bombs from the 1980’s,” Roberts was getting on board with her idea.

“Yes, you could send over like a vat of it by the transporter and the boom. If you could continue to transport twenty loads every minute you might achieve a situation where it never stops exploding,” Lexi liked her lips feeling a sense of excitement. “The Goo wouldn’t kill the person under the implants. The goo might hold them in place like a huge jello ball and maybe lives could be saved past the phaser method which was the only method used to stop the onslaught of the Borg when they were encountered.”

“A cute idea to terminate or repel a super evil force. Seems almost a joke.” He commented “I will work on your “Slime X1 torpedo” once this absurd situation finishes”
Then, almost impatient to see what the bucket would have done, Kai was crouching and awaiting for the explosion, or for the nothing. Both shows would have been interesting anyway.

“Done we have a name,” Lexi stuck out her hand with a smile. “You know if this works we will become famous for the scientists that ended a war without raising a phaser,” she laughed.

“Monitoring the integrity of the bucket. Time to activation in three, two, one,” Jensen reported as the people safely behind the forcefield Kai created looked at the room.

Lt. Lexi Robins

It was then that the doors swung open as EMMA came in, as she looked around. She had been reading some strange power settings coming from this sector as she had begun to find out just what was going on. “Who is in charge in here?” she said as she got next to the container as she looked over at the team, wanting an answer but unaware of the consequences.

Lexi looked up and was shocked at who she saw. It couldn’t be. “Kate,” she said pressing her palms against the invisible wall. There was no way t could be her but it was as if she was looking at the woman’s twin.

“Wh- OH CRISPY DON’T GET NEAR THAT BUCKET!” He shouted loudly, forgetting that in anytime the slime could explode inside.
And as he was in a 2000s movie with a slow-mo effects, Oliver was now trying inadvertently to reach EMMA, but without success as the forcefield restricted such movement.
A silent pause before the inevitable.

EMMA’s piercing blue eyes looked around as he lifting Australian accent filled the room, only to have the eruption go off right next to her as the goo began to coat her before seconds afterward there was nothing at all as she vanished, leaving nothing but a pile of goof and a com badge on the floor to much shock and horror to those around to see the proceedings.


Ouch - Kai thought. “Nice we have now pieces of whatever she was to clean too!” He said with a horrified face and looking the rest of the reaction happen. The question was, would this mess finish once at all?

After the explosion of the bucket and the goo’s ones in the room, Kai shouted various times to check that everything was okey, and nothing would have happened. He was the first to cross the forcefield that was just turned off to check and search for whatever remained of the bucket.
Apparently a normal containment unit wasn’t enough. “I guess… we need reinforced buckets.” And as he was crouching to look more closer to it, the Badge of what was EMMA was resting there, covered under a pile of warm and wet goo.
“And… more mops.” He mourned taking the badge away.

Ensign Kai O. Kingstone - Scientist

Lexi was far more into the mystery of it all. “Okay let’s review the data,” Lexi reached her hand out for the comm badge. From the cursory inspection, she had not seen any real damage to the comm badge. “First we have this stuff all over us and it has exploded on us and we did not disintegrate. Duncan said it was good for the skin but not that it eats through all organic tissue. That would be need to know information and Duncan is a need to know kinda guy. So our hypothesis has to be she isn’t human however, I know who just went, poof. Her name was Kate O’Neill. She was a security officer on the Odin. This woman was from engineering. So she is maybe a twin,” Lexi threw out a suggestion.

“The second thing we need to look at is the comm badge. Was it damaged at all?”


“K-Kate?” Asked Kai to Lexi as he looked the comm badge - then with a little nodding he confirmed that it was a bit damaged “but from the fall. It is a bit scratched but functioning. Also it seems it is not the usual badge we use.”
Kai was tempted to press it. But left it on the table as he kept making inspections all around the room.
So far the whole story was weird and damn intriguing: the goo, the explosions, the vanishing figure. Kai was having literally fun but was annoyed by this goo and wanted to call someone else to clean this mess.

Ensign Kai O. Kingstone - Scientist

“She was a crewman on the Odin that served with my husband. In a random happenstance, she helped deliver my baby with her boyfriend that was a doctor. Anyway,” Lexi waved her hand dismissively, “I don’t know why she just went kaboom but that was her.”

“Ma’am time check,” Roberts said looking at his watch. One had at times to keep the officers on track. There was only four minutes left to the next kaboom.

“Mmm hmm,” Lexi nodded not really paying attention to Roberts. She as now in the zone.

“So why do you not think there aren’t bits of bits of her lying around,” Lex asked Kai resting her chin on the edge of the mop. “Hologram?” For the goo problem that was an easy answer but on a personal level that opened a whole new set of questions. Why would she have sold her likeness and are there Kate O’Neill’s all over the fleet? Shaun seemed like a nice enough guy but she doubted Chris would like her popping up all over ships saying how can I serve you to any Tom, Dick, or Harry that activated her.

“Yeah probably? Can be the answer.” Replied Kai. It was really tempting to tap the badge, and for a second he actually tapped it. But apparently it seemed broken or whatever “nice it does not work!”

“Ma’am…one minute to boom,” Roberts repeated urgently herding his group to what the group was now calling the KSZ or Kai Safety Zone. If the other two officers were that enthralled about the situation fine. They got paid more as officers and that mean when the stuff rolled downhill the officers were the first to get splattered both figuratively and literally. Roberts and Jensen were not going to be cleaning out goo where the sun didn’t shine if he could help it. The Atlantis had several mottos but the one about not leaving a man behind didn’t really apply here to him. It wasn’t like Kai and Lexi were going to be vaporized. They were just going to be more…gooey.

Kai rushed inside the clean pocket while Lexi was still outside “Lexi you’re going with us, aren’t you?” He questioned terrified as the clock was ticking
tic tic tic

“Alexandra,” Roberts snapped using her given name. “Five, four, three,” he belted out counting down and pointing to his watch.

“Nutter butter,” Lexi screamed bolting for the KSZ. Luckily she slid in also before Roberts activated the shield.

The doors slid open as Kate strolled back into the room on the last three seconds of the countdown. “Okay, so what is,” was all the poor woman on the other side of the force field got out before the safety system of the door closed and she again was seemingly disintegrated by the goo.


“AHHHHHH!” Kai screamed like a girl - then realizing that she was actually a hologram and that everyone in the safe zone were looking at him, Oliver tried to hide his red blushed face and whispering he said “sorry.”
“Ah-Ah ah… ah! See? It is a hologram. Nothing to worry- Ah…!”
luckily for Kai he hadn’t any heartache and was still survivor of the pretty funny situation.
“No one advised me we had a hologram onboard!” He raged

Ensign Kai O. Kingstone - Scientist

“And no one told me that hologram is a girl I know. She helped deliver my baby and informed my husband he was a baby daddy ten minutes before I was going to walk down the aisle,” Lexi summarized her interactions with the persona of the hologram in about twenty words. “Anyway that is not the issue,” she waved her hands about. “The issue is getting this situation under control before the next kaboom. It’s like we are taking two steps backward for every step forward. We need to find some way to get ahead of the situation,” Lexi let out a long breath through her lips that showed her frustration level.

“Well can’t we beam it out into space now that we know the boom cycle,” Jensen scratched his chin. “I mean it is just slime for the next eighteen minutes and twelve seconds.”


“Probably we could. So… I’m going to prepare the transporter, should I?” He asked to Lexi, when an improbable a new figure appeared and joined them. He was called Vladar, someone that Kai never saw, but seemed young as him. He wore the classic yellow uniform, and his ranks were the same as his.

In a newly minted Starfleet uniform, Dan came to the problem area Captain Bordeaux had directed him to investigate. “Oh what fresh hell is this?” he came up behind the scientists. “Vladar. Security. You didn’t call, but… clearly you need help. What exactly is this stuff, what does it do, and is anyone injured?”

-Ensign Dan Vladar, Security

“Worry not, Mr. Vladar, I say correctly? Uhm… this is kinda a weird experiment.” Kai said with some goo everywhere as he crouched and searched for his tricorder in the mess “No one is injured - I-I mean for now.”
Jensen was right behind him and his head was still a bit shaky from the explosion he previously experienced. To avoid denying his mate affirmation he just faked to be alright, thinking still “welp… My head still hurts.”

Ensign Kai O. Kingstone - Scientist

OOC: WHOOPS made a confusion! I’m scientist not a CSO. Sorry MotherHen for stealing your title for a minute. Ehehe Mr. Sean and Ari confused me.

Dan leaned over Kai, making his full 6’5” present. “For now? No one is injured for now? What did you make?” he looked around at the mess of a room. “It already looks like some sort of grenade went off in here!”

-Ensign Dan Vladar, Security

“Some girl named Kate but she really didn’t get hurt because she a ship’s hologram. I’m Lexi Robins,” she stuck out her hand answering the rhetorical question of who is hurt.

“As to what is going on,” Lexi looked at Kai. Sighing deeply she made a gesture towards her fellow science officer. “Wanna take this over,” she let out a small laugh.

“To be honest,” Kai spoke thinking “I don’t know very well the origin about this… stuff.” He appointed looking Vladar with his hands on his waist “as you, fellow mate, I was walking down this corridor to take my check-in and they just put me in this situation. Oh oh, what a damn and tremendous situation.”

In the meanwhile he went over a console and was typing stuff already. Whether they were going to transport that thing somewhere out the ship or find another way to toggle that goo, Kai didn’t wanted to lose time between any action, and so he programmed a transporter beam that would have transported the goo, and probably some items of the lab, out of the ship if Lexi and the crew wanted “we just know, that this slimy… organism? Explodes within 20 minutes, reacting to sounds and when it KABOOM, we have more of it. Also it is good for the skin.”

Ensign Kai O. Kingstone - Scientist

“It does. It really does,” Lexi agreed rubbing her hands a bit. ” They were super soft, like baby soft. Aside from the exploding from the jar every time you opened it someone could make a mint if they sold this.”

Lexi Robbins

“Ahahah! Nice this one. Weirdly enough this situation remembers me something happened with my grandma. She found a tribble somewhere stuck in her house,” Kai giggled “and when she decided she wanted to keep it, she probably gave it some food. Then time a day or two, you would enter the house full of tribbles! Ah! I love those animals.”

As he ended typing the code in the computer, Kai gave a look at the time on his PaDD: T minus 3 minutes - “Okay guys, we have three minutes! Then everything gets Kaboom again. So I’ve prepared the transporter and whether you want to expunge this stuff, it should do! Also, if I find a way to avoid those thing exploding, I might make a lot of profits… Hmmm”
Space Green Goo Cream, a nice natural product, that will help your skin to shine again!

Ensign Kai O. Kingstone - Scientist

“You’re right,” Lexi said running across the room to get a sample jar. They knew how to make more so they only needed a tiny amount to sample that wasn’t going to get beamed into deep space. Scooping up a sample the was way too small for the container she tightened the lid and moved to the safety zone Kai had created earlier.

Looking at her colleague she shrugged. “We need to keep some and there is more than enough room to contain the kaboom. Then we have twenty minutes to get it to the main science lab, slap it in a sound dampening field, and then we can study it safely this time. Valder,” Lexi motioned him to her side. “I would come over here or you will be picking goo out of places you might not want to mention,” she pointed at the timer ticking down from thirty seconds.

Captain Kelly Bordeaux

Dan moved into the safe zone. “I’m used to doing this with grenades, not gelatin.”

-Ensign Dan Vladar, Security

“Oh, you don’t eat it. You rub it in like this,” Lexi pulled a glop off her pant leg and massaged it onto the back of his hand. Smooth as a baby’s bottom. You know we could make a male version to sell. Something with a name like Grenade Grease: It will blow years off your hands,” she joked as the transporters whisked it away from the deck before the explosion. The only residual trace of Kai’s and Lexi’s three-hour adventure was the sealed glass jar that now held a thick viscous gelatin which was reacting like lava.”

Lt. Lexi Robins Science

“Ahah! It would be funny if that hologram-kinda person, came back again. Well, I hope she does not get blown up again! Also, where are the sound dampeners, hmm…” as he took his PaDD he looked the registry of the items in the lab: Sound Dampeners Field Generator, click. “What, we have even some Marbles circuit for kids, in the lab?”
Should be there… somewhere here… “AH-AH! Ok found it, now I know where to search.”
But something blocked him from joying too much - the container I-203 was located under that whole slime mess, and was blocked there as their hope to reach it before the time.
“Oh man…” he moaned, letting his arms free fall on his flanks.

Ensign Kai O. Kingstone - Scientist

Dan pulled up his left sleeve, revealing a metal prosthesis. “What do you need and from where?”

-Ensign Dan Vladar, Security

“Oh wew!” He exclaimed “what’s that?”
Kai was so curious of that sort of metallic prosthesis. The last time he saw someone with that kind of replacement was on Tyra II. As he was told, this dude lost his leg because he accidentally used a hand laser cutter without knowing it was charged and functional. “Nevermind, ahem, so you see that kind closet?” He pointed the lowest closet of the first bench before the first entrance to the lab “I need the container labeled I-203. There are the sound dampeners devices. The problem is, that we have hundreds of kilos of slime on that bench and to be honest, it will be hard even with that prosthesis.” He concluded looking both Lexi and Vladar.

Ensign Kai O. Kingstone - Scientist

“Yeah,” Lexi said slowly looking at Vladar’s arm. The idea of the slime blowing apart and shorting out the Borg circuitry now had a whole other meaning. If the point of weaponizing the goo was to take out electronic and bionic parts, she sure didn’t want to test out the theory on Vladar. “Okay so you are out of the retrieval,” she ran her fingers through her hair. At some point, everyone called in for reinforcements during any war. This might be the time to call in for that help.

Tapping her comm badge, Lexi took a deep breath and forced a fake smile. The man on the other end would not see it but it helped her try to keep a happy, upbeat tone. =/\= Jacen....watcha doing,=/\= she said in a slightly sing songy tone.

Lt. Lexi Robins

Jacen sat in his quarters in his evening wear as he heard the chime come up. It was lateish, his shift had ended about two hours ago as had settled for the evening. Sitting on his couch he had a holovid movie going of his favorite Christmas movie, Die Hard as he sighed deeply. “Computer pause film.” he said before he hit his combadge that was on the end table.

=/\=If you haven’t blown up a portion of the ship I don’t want to hear about it Lieutenant Robins… go round up the breakfast club of Chris, Ian, and yourself and just make redo the paint of any damaged panels…=/\= Jacen said with an eye roll. He regretted befriending Ian’s old academy friends. He certainly didn’t need more people in his life to ask him to do everything at the drop of a dime. He already created their perfect wedding so he figured they owed him.

Drayke, CE

=/\=About that.....yeaahhhhhhh,=/\= Lexi slowly drew out the words not sure how to keep the conversation going. She knew how to set Ian in his place when he was ticked off and fixing a pissy Chris was easy. She was his wife and just used the oldest currency in the world to get him talking or forgiving her. Jacen was a different beast.

“Lex we are t-minus 90 seconds before we explode and increase by 3.69 cubic meters volume. The door isn’t protected so anyone coming in is going to get a face full of youth juice,” Jensen growled, “not to mention creating a slipping hazard in the hall. And if it gets in his turbo shaft, we have no idea what that kind of lubrication can do.”

“Probably increase the rise rate by about six times,” Roberts snickered thinking of the tube shooting up more than the required amount of floors.

“Shhhh,” Lexi waved at the two other science officers talking in the background.


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