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Counselor’s Officer - Counseling Check-In, long time no see

Posted Aug. 19, 2020, 12:02 p.m. by Lieutenant Junior Grade Kai Oliver Kingstone (Chief Science Officer) (Jay Luistro)

Posted by Lieutenant Revna Edman (Counselor) in Counselor’s Officer - Counseling Check-In, long time no see

Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Kai Oliver Kingstone (Chief Science Officer) in Counselor’s Officer - Counseling Check-In, long time no see

Posted by Lieutenant Revna Edman (Counselor) in Counselor’s Officer - Counseling Check-In, long time no see
(snip)
“I do feel better, thank you Mrs. Edman. I am ready to talk about what happened… I would just love a glass of water, If I may.” He asked to the Counselor gently. His mood was now chiller, the exercise worked perfectly! He should’ve done it more often.

Lieutenant Jr. grade Kai O. Kingstone - CSO

Revna got up and requested a glass of water, cool for the Lt from the replicator and then she brought it over and handed it to him. She sat down and waited. Kai seemed to have taken to the exercise, and that was good, but that didn’t mean he was ready to explode with information about his past. He had to find his starting point, where he thought it all began, or at least where the story should start.
Lt. Edman, Counselor

“Water. The most basic element, yet it is the best resource ever existed. Ahah…” he nervously giggled, sipping some of the water “Alright. I do remember stuff and some I have deleted can’t be recovered. But what I do remember is that there was this day in my childhood where I gave a party. I remember still the faces of all invitees, they were all my bestfriends onboard my father’s ship. At that time we got the best room, on the Starboard flank of the fantastic USS Hegemony. I really loved that ship but as I gave that party we contemporarily entered a pirate-known zone and it was matter of hours that on us three ships tried to board the Hegemony.” Kai took a pause, drank another sip and as some tear came on his eyes, he stared the still water in the glass in his hand and he sighed “We knew what to do, but we had not time to reach the muster stations. A disruptor charge hit our lounge and a rapid decompression happened. Some of my friends laid in the cold space suffocating, while I had the damn luck to survive as I was the nearest to the door and had a strong grip. Eventually an Officer managed to activate the emergency force field but the damage was already done. Three of them were flying out there while I and the others remained traumatized or lightly injured. I must admit it was a pain to give up to birthday parties but I haven’t… I haven’t done any in the last 12 years…” at that point he could not resist anymore and his tears became a flood, a cry that was perhaps painful.

Lieutenant Jr. grade Kai O. Kingstone - CSO

Revna listened quietly as Kai’s story slowly came out. To be a young child and loose your friends that way, would have broken strong adults prepared for such things. To be a child and move on past it was a remarkable testimony to his strength of character. Revna moved softly to a chair closer to Kai, but not within his space. She reached over and took the glass from him and put it on the table near him, and then she took his hand. She didn’t say anything, she let him release it, and held onto his hand so he would know he was not alone. He had said something similar had happened to his aunt, but she was okay. And she was sure the ships current predicament with the pirates was probably adding to Kai’s stress as well.
Lt. Edman, Counselor

Kai pulled over the hand of the Counselor and hugged her as it was his usual and found it a ‘normal’ action “Thanks, Mrs. Edman, it was tough but hell I fell lighter.” He nodded behind the hug “I know she (His Aunt) is fine but many have perished. I can only imagine her discomfort and fear in that situation…” ending the phrase Kai left the hand, and immediately realized that his habit kicked in. Blushing somewhat a reddish pepper he cleaned his eyes and leant apologies “I’m sorry… really!” He chuckled to lighten everything.

Lieutenant Jr. grade Kai O. Kingstone - CSO

Revna returned Kai’s hug because sometimes silence and space was needed, but other times knowing you aren’t alone and people care was more important. “You don’t have to thank me Mr. Kingstone.” She choose to address him the way he did her, allowing him to direct his comfort level. “Have you been able to speak with her? I know right now, we are in a unique situation, but if you haven’t I would suggest you call her as soon as we are able. In the mean time, why don’t you write your aunt some letters, and tell her about how you feel, your experiences, and how you feel about her and her situation. You can send it when we get back to where we should be.” She reaches over and hands him the glass of water again. She moves over to the replicator and returns setting down a damp cloth near him, if he wants it. “No apologies here. In here, it is acceptable to express your feelings, whatever they may be.” She smiles at his laughter. But waits quietly for him to determine how he wants to move forward.
Lt. Edman, counselor

Enjoying the warmth of the hug, Kai stayed silent as he felt almost like hugged by his mom as he used to do as a Kid. Then noticing the cloth he looked a second at it and decided that it was ok to show some pain to the people and indeed put on his legs “Yes I have contacted her… She repeatedly told me she was fine and everything but I don’t feel like I have ever asked her the right amount. Since that attack I have called her all weekends and so far she is still being patient.” He giggled looking at his feet “I am really paranoic… tsk”

Lieutenant Jr. grade Kai O. Kingstone - CSO

“Well then, as far as your aunt goes, the only thing you can do is keep asking and listen. When she’s ready she’ll tell you. And she may not. Everyone has different ways of dealing with trauma. The best we can do is listen and be present when we are with them.” Revna considered his last statement. “I don’t think you’re paranoid, Kai. I think you are cautious and evaluate your current experiences based on your past. And that’s all anyone can do.”

“The best we can do…” Kai whispered to agree with the counselor “Ugh… if you think I am not paranoid then I should listen to you, Miss Edman.” The Lieutenant faked a smile “I just- I just feel misplaced and stuff that’s it. I guess.”

“Why do you feel you are paranoid, Kai?” Revna saw the fake smile and felt like there was something more there than Kai was telling her. “Why do you feel misplaced?”

“Now, let’s go back to that grounding exercise. Now that we have moved past it a little ways, how do you feel about it? Do you still think it helped you, or should we try something different?”
Lt. Edman, Counselor

“I think it helped, somehow.” Kai shrugged his shoulders thinking about how he felt in that moment “but there’s still something that does not convince me. I mean my aunt never told me yet about this from her perspective but does not me allow to physically comfort her either. I feel like in a limbo, Counselor. It is just so hard to believe she refuses every kind of comfort.” The CSO was usually seen as a strong man in character, but sometimes even the best walls falls down. Now he tried to be reconstructed but knew that if things were not settling between him and his aunt, he would have passed a long period with the Counselor.

Lieutenant Jr. grade Kai O. Kingstone - CSO

Revna took a breath and considered. She felt that Kai needed to comfort his aunt for himself and not necessarily for her. She had no doubt he loved and cared for his aunt very much. “I know you want to comfort her, but perhaps she’s not ready, or perhaps because she is your aunt, she sees herself as your elder as a second parent, she can’t bring herself to put this on you, because she cared for you. But when someone else experiences a trauma similar to our own we must allow them to cope in their way not in ours. When you were a child, you needed to share your story and receive physical comfort. Your aunt may not find it comforting or helpful to talk about and be physically comforted. Forcing someone to cope with their trauma in our way can make their trauma worse. We have to love them enough to let them heal their way, not our own.”
Lt. Edman, Counselor

We have to love them enough to let them heal their way the phrase stuck in Kai’s head. For some moments the CSO stayed silent and indeed he looked at his hands almost like recalling something “I totally forgot this side of the events. You’re right counselor.” He sighed closing his eyes “You’re totally right. She was like a second mother to me as mine was always busy with Starfleet. Nothing wrong there, she loved me as my aunt did. But I feel like an equivalent connection and it is in my nature to feel empathy. Ugh, I should sometimes remember that pressing isn’t always the way… What I can do then?” Crossing his arms Kai was a bit lost about what was his role there “I know I mustn’t comfort her but… I can do something else? To help her?”

Lieutenant Jr. grade Kai O. Kingstone - CSO

“Do you have pictures of you and your aunt? Or maybe of just her or just you, but it was something that you did together. You can send her those pictures. Maybe 1 or 2 at a time. So you can send them over a long period. She gets them every week. Something to look forward to. Or if not pictures write her a letter and tell her, ‘remember that time we did....’ and fill in the blank. Arrange to have her favorite candy delivered, or something that she likes. And most importantly just keep sending her letters, tell her about what you are doing, and always remember to tell her you love her. That’s the best thing you can do,” Revna told him. Kai was caring individual and she was sure that this situation was hard for him, double so with being out of touch for the moment.
Lt. Edman, Counselor

“Yes I do have. So I should send her pics of us, not all in once. And letters,” he checked an invisible list in his head. Kai was practically a human computer that could register lots of informations before forgetting them “what about if I send her some pastry… or cakes? She taught me how to cook them and I honestly love the way she taught me on how to do it. I mean it is not a picture but it is also something that makes sense… I guess?” He shrugged his shoulder looking at the counselor.

Lieutenant Jr. grade Ari Kux Salemberger - CSO


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