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Shipwide Side Sim: Catching up with Lucas Holloway

Posted Feb. 17, 2019, 12:05 a.m. by Colonel Calvin Harris (Commanding Officer) (Jerome Davis)

Posted by Captain Molly Wright (Chief Intelligence Officer) in Shipwide Side Sim: Catching up with Lucas Holloway
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Molly squeezed her uncle’s hands and looked back up at him. Tears still streaked her cheeks. “I’m sorry.” She managed to say. “I’m sorry… I didn’t know. I thought…” She gulped. “I didn’t know I had been that much of an accident… that much unwanted… I’m sorry… I didn’t know about all that happened… dad… your— my grandparents…” With a sigh, Molly cleared her throat. Resolve suddenly in her gaze. “I want to visit.” She finally said. “I want to meet them, uncle Luc. After this is all said and done… I could maybe go with you. For a week or two. I have some leave I haven’t taken yet. And I’m sure Calvin…” Her voice faltered slightly. “… I’m sure he wouldn’t mind. But I need to sort all of this out first. And Calvin to come around after that… Will you stay on board until then?” There was a pleading tone in her eyes and in her voice.

Lucas smiled warmly and, wiping the tears from Molly’s cheeks, kissed her forehead then hugged her tightly once more. “I know they would love to see you Gracie. And as for staying…” He looked back into her eyes. “… I’d love to.”

For a moment, Molly paused as if she was fighting back tears. Squeezing Lucas’s hands tighter, a sob escaped her throat. “I miss… I miss her, uncle Luc. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t miss her. I wish she could see Erin… that she could see the amazing woman she has become. All I have of her is a book and faint memories. It was all I took from home when we left. Her battered copy of A Journey to the Center of the Earth and the necklace she wore… the one that has our names on it… I gave it to Erin… I thought she should have it. Everything else stayed behind… all the pictures… everything. I kept this…” Molly fumbled with her collar for a second before taking out a thin golden chain with a small golden cross on it. “It’s from my confirmation. Mom picked it for me… but she was never there to give it to me…” Molly sobbed again. “I don’t know what’s right or wrong anymore. But… you knew her. You knew my mother. Can you tell me about her?”

Molly

“I miss Mary too honey, more than you know.” There was a fleeting moment of eminence sadness in his eyes as he spoke, the kind of pain that could never truly be put into words. “Your mother was a good woman, kind beyond all imagination with the utter patience of a saint. They did grow to love each other over the years, but those closest to them knew that they were probably on borrowed time before…” A single tear ran down Lucas’ cheek and he looked for a split second like he’d seen a ghost before he smiled lovingly at her once more. “… my God, you do look like Mary. Seriously Gracie, you could’a been her twin.”

Molly could see in her uncle’s eyes a different pain than hers. The pain of losing someone very close that one remembered very well. Borrowed time… The expression surprised Molly. Had she thought about divorcing her father? For a second, Molly wondered what would have happened if she hadn’t passed away and she and her dad had gone their own separate ways. But there was no point in entertaining the thought for long.

Lucas reached into his suit pocket and pulled out a small cherry box. Barely larger than a stack of two decks of cards, its rounded polished top engraved with the letters ‘M.G.H’. “I gave this to your mother…” Lucas began. “… on your parent’s first anniversary. As you got Grace from your mother, I thought it fitting that you should have it. Go ahead…” He smiled. “… open it.”

Molly took the box in her shaking hands, trying her best not to drop it. It was curious… something she had never noticed before, but with her original name, her and her mother shared the exact same initials.

The box’s lid squeaked softly and the second it was open, Molly would see the bright smile of Mary Grace Holloway staring up at her from a small, wallet sized photo. And yes, the resemblance with her mother was striking, as Molly felt as though she was looking… hauntingly… at a photo of herself her Senior year at Starfleet Academy.

Another sob escaped Molly’s lips as the picture came into view. It had been a long time since she had seen a picture of her mother. Nineteen years to be more exact. She had struggled to hold the memories in her mind… her face, her smile… and now it all came back to her. All this time she had been so angry to stare at her father’s eyes every time she looked in the mirror, that she had never noticed that she had her mother’s smile… just like she had the same hair, the same lips, nose and freckles…

Gently she touched the picture with her index finger, almost as if she wanted them to pass through the paper into the great beyond and touch her mother’s face once more. The longing in her heart was devastating.

“Your mother was barely 22 in that picture…” Lucas continued. “… if you look under it, there’s a data stick containing probably every photo and video ever taken of your mother from the day I met her… I was a witness at their courthouse wedding… till three days before…” He sighed, clearly brokenhearted. “… before your sister was born. It…” The tears started again as his voice cracked. “… it also has the only picture of Mary holding Erin. I…” He held composure well but Molly could tell this was very difficult for him. “… I took the picture. Seconds later… they took Erin and handed her to me as Mary passed from this world.” Drying his tears on his hand, he trembled as he said softly. “Mary was my best friend… I knew I had to take that picture because she wanted it… wanted Erin to know her mother held her… one time.”

“My God…” The words left her mouth in a whisper as Molly realized what her uncle had just given her. Tears streamed down her cheeks once more as she remembered the fateful day. That evening, Molly had helplessly watched as her mother fell down the stairs. She had talked to her and tried to make her stand but to no avail. The next thing she knew, she was being pushed inside an ambulance and both had been rushed to the hospital. She remembered the blood, the doctors working around her… Her grandparents running to her and taking her away from her mother, while Mary was taken inside. They told her that she was going to get to see her baby sister that night and Molly remembered how excited she had been. And then… a serious looking doctor came into the room… followed by her uncle who hugged her tightly and tried to explain to her that mommy was not coming home. Molly remembered walking in, hand in hand with Lucas to see her baby sister. Her mother was still on the bed… she was resting. Her small hand reached out and held on to her mother’s for a second. Twenty-three years later, and the coldness of her skin still plagued her nightmares.

Gaining some level of strength, Lucas continued. “That there…” He pointed to the small gold necklace. “… was your mother’s Confirmation necklace. She wore it every day… I know she’d want you t have it.” His warm smile returning. “And I know she’d be damn proud of you both.”

Lucas

Molly slowly placed the box on the coffee table next to her uncle, as she held the necklace between her fingers. It was a slightly more elaborate version of her own, but with the same elements — the thin gold chain and the gold cross.

Looking at it, she remembered the necklace. Molly used to play with it whenever her mother carried her in her arms. For a second she placed the gold chain back on the box and reached behind her neck, taking off the one she carried. After a few seconds, her mother’s necklace disappeared inside her tunic.

Lucas had a warm glow as he saw Mary’s necklace where it belonged, around her eldest daughter’s neck. That fateful night, the same simple piece of jewelry had been in Lucas’ hand as he told his niece the most terrible thing anyone would have to tell a child… that their mother was gone. Lucas had taken the thin gold chain from around Mary’s neck moments after the duty Chaplain had administered Last Rights, after watching his sister-in-law… and honestly probably the first person he’d ever truly loved… take her last breaths. It had been one of the worst days of his life and he had suffered much of his most intense pain alone. He hurt for his nieces, who would never truly know their mother. For Mary’s parents… for his parents, a daughter lost in the most tragic of ways. For his brother, losing his wife and mother to his only children yet never knowing that within months, Mary had planned to leave him for good. Leave him… for Lucas. It had long been discussed, but both he & Mary respected the status quo. Yet, over the years, their friendship had blossomed into something more… and while they would have never crossed that line while Mary was still Peter’s wife… they knew that, once the dust had settled… they wanted to at least give it a try. But, it was never to be. A handful of kisses were all he had shared with a woman Lucas quietly swore he’d love till his last breath.... even if he were the only one to ever know it.

Molly took her own chain. The one that her mother had picked for her so many years ago but had never seen her wear it. Reaching forward for one of her uncle’s hands, she turned it face up and placed the necklace on his palm, closing his fingers around it. “I want you to have that one. Dad told me on the day of my confirmation that mom had picked it for me. I want you to have it. As a token of appreciation, and as something to remember me by.”

It took every thing in Lucas not to openly bawl as he closed his hand around the small, sparkling cross and tears poured down onto his shaking hands as he looked at the tiny gift Lucas knew meant so much to his niece. “I hope I never have to just “remember” you ever again Gracie.” His voice cracked.

“I don’t know if you believe… mom certainly did. Sometimes I feel guilty that I don’t. I can’t understand what God that would let this happen… Maybe one day I will…”

“Oh Gracie…” Lucas sighed heavily, his eyes still rimmed in tears. “… I have never been a very strong man of the Faith but I can tell you, your mother was and to be honest… knowing that gave me comfort in the years since Mary left us. That, if right, she got to watch you girls grow from wherever she is now and knew that you were alright.”

After a moment of silence, she looked up at Lucas once again. “I wish mom had married you instead.” There was longing and sadness in her voice. “You were there when no one else was… Even when I couldn’t see you. You taught me how to tie my shoes, and how to tell the time… You taught me most of the things I knew growing up…” She wiped a tear from her face. “For all that’s worth… you’re my dad.”

Molly

Lucas crumpled onto Molly’s shoulder, tears soaking it as he raggedly breathed and held Molly tighter than he had in years. “Oh Gracie…” The man sobbed. “… you will never, ever know how much that means to me. How hard it was to let you and your sister go. It was like losing a part of my very soul.” Lucas leaned back and in an instant, both niece and Uncle were back in time. Central Park Zoo, Molly had just dropped her ice cream and was terrified of the trouble she’d be in when her dad got back from the bathroom with her sister. Her Uncle Lucas dropped to one knee, his hands holding her face as to where he could dry both cheeks with his thumbs. He gently shushed the scared nine year-old and, wiping the tears away, kissed her forehead gently. “We are a family Gracie and families love… before all else… we love.” He then walked her to the stand and got her another ice cream just in time.

Molly held her uncle as he sobbed heavily onto her shoulder. Molly’s own tears sprinkling the back of his suit jacket. She might never know how much her words meant to him, but she knew for sure that they meant a lot. And she meant them. Every single one of them.

As the two were again back on the couch, light-years from that day… that park… Lucas’ hands did the same wiping away of tears, the same holding of a much older niece’s face and with a cracking voice, Lucas said once more. “We are a family Gracie and families love… before all else… we love.”

Lucas

As the words left his mouth, Molly’s mind went back to that same day. To the ice cream fallen on the ground, and to the terror she had felt within her, when Lucas uttered those same words. At the time she hadn’t fully comprehended the meaning behind them, but now she saw how the man before her lived by them. It was her turn to sob, as her arms wrapped around her uncle’s neck, hugging him with the same urgency a daughter would to a father. “Thank you.” She managed to say between her tears. “Thank you for everything you’ve done for us. For being there… for taking care of us both in person and from the distance… Thank you for giving us all the opportunities you could. You were the only bright spot on our lives in New York City… You made our days more bearable. I wish we hadn’t lost so many years. I’m so sorry…” Molly’s words were muffled as she never lifted her face from his shoulder. “I… I love you, Uncle Luc… and I meant every single word I said… And now that you’re here, I promise… I’ll never let you go.”

“Gracie…” Lucas’ voice cracked as he squeezed his niece in a tight hug, his head resting against the side of Molly’s as he struggled through his own emotions. “… you will never know… how much that means.” The elder Holloway sobbed. “I have hated myself for years for not fighting for you girls, for not putting my foot down and saying enough was enough…” Lucas shook from the wracking sobs as he spoke, pouring out his heart for the closest thing he’d ever had to a daughter. “… you girls could have been spared so much heartache… so much pain. Your dad might still be alive…” He gasped. “… your mother… at least you girls would have been alright. But…” He kissed the side of her head and continued to hold on, hold on for dear life. “… but you & Erin wouldn’t be the amazing young women you are today. Change one thing and you or your sister could have been spoiled brats.” He then chuckled softly. “Well.. not anymore than you two were to begin with.” He hugged her tightly once more.

Finally, Molly moved back and wiped the tears from her face, sniffing as she did so. “Thank you for coming for me. And thank you for the box… and everything in it. The pictures… I’ll send them to Erin. She should have them too. The only thing she has is that necklace… The one I was talking about… With our names on it… It’s safe in San Francisco, but… For as much as it pains me to say it… I don’t think she will ever have the same connection. Part of me understands why. Part of me wishes I could have raised her better… but I tried my best with the tools that I was given. And ultimately, Robert did a much better job than I could ever have done.”

The mention of the Mother’s Necklace caught Lucas by surprise, leaving him momentarily breathless. He had paid for the necklace himself weeks before Erin’s birth as a gift for Mary after she told him her new daughter’s name… Erin Leah… with Erin a nod to her Uncle’s middle name… Elliot. The inverted initials of his own first & middle name. The words would stay with Lucas forever ‘How I wish she was yours’. The loss of Mary and the near loss of Erin nearly killed him and, long before his brother, Lucas had… for the only time in his life… seriously contemplated ending it. The memory of that little redheaded baby, his baby as far as he would ever be concerned, in his arms that night… the only person that could calm her after Mary was gone… had broke through the pain and Lucas left the cold, dark Brooklyn Bridge the Christmas Eve after Erin’s birth never to return. He never told anyone he had ever gone there that night and it was something that had always haunted him… that his brother leaped from the bridge not ten feet from where he had stood on the edge of forever a half decade before.

“Stop that Gracie…” Lucas shook his head slowly. “… you gave everything you could to your sister and did better than anyone else, including your Uncle, in looking out for her. And…” Lucas sighed. “… I have long prepared myself for that possibility, certain Erin & I would never have the relationship you and I have. That’s my own goddamn fault, not yours.” The pain at those words radiated in Lucas’ eyes, like putting the words out into the universe acknowledging the loss of one’s own child.

There was resolve in her eyes when Molly looked back at her uncle. “Before we head down to Missouri, I need to stop in San Francisco. I want you to come with me to the courthouse, if you could. I realized mom and I share the same initials… and I want to change my name back. I think it’s time for me to close this chapter of my life… I was angry and scared… and I didn’t want to be tracked down. I wanted to erase my dad from my name. Using mom’s maiden name felt both like making a statement and finding some closeness… but in the end, she was a Holloway too. And more importantly, so are you. I was born a Holloway. I think I should die one.”

Molly

The tears flowed once more from Molly’s uncle as he hugged her tightly again and then smiled the brightest smile Molly had ever seen on another human being. “It would be my honor Gracie. You name the time and place, I’ll be there. Your Grandparents will be over the moon.” He paused for a moment and smiled. “Either way, your mother would have died a Holloway no matter what… she wore our family name like a badge of honor. She would have wanted it for you. This is your family, always.” Lucas beamed at his niece.

Lucas

Molly smiled as the sudden happiness in Lucas’s expression seemed to fill the room. It had been a long time since she had seen him this happy. He had never been the same after her mother’s passing. None of them had…

An inquisitive eyebrow rose in Molly’s face as her uncle’s words processed in her brain. Either way, your mother would have died a Holloway what exactly did he mean? She wore our family name like a badge of honor. Oh… Molly’s smile subsided slightly as she tried to picture her own mother, proud of the family name. A possibility that had never occurred to her before. She reached for the little box with Mary’s initials and for a second, she lost herself in the old picture inside it.

After a long silence, Molly finally spoke. “How could she be proud of the Holloway name when her father-in-law strip them both from the fortune and made everything more difficult for them? Why would she wear it as a badge of honor? She was married to the family’s screw up that got drunk and beat her up. How did she manage to…?”

Molly

Holloway froze momentarily. He knew in that second he had slipped up… screwed up and let show a secret he had had no intention to share. Thinking quickly, Lucas replied cheerfully.

“Your mother…” He began with a bright smile. “… knew damn well that the judgement handed down against Peter had actually nothing to do with her, or for that matter… you, and she was keenly aware that her children would be the heirs to one of the largest fortunes in modern history. Mom & Dad had their disagreements with certain ways Mary raised you…” Molly’s Uncle suddenly paused and burst out laughing.

“Hell! When your mother announced at Christmas Dinner… in front of God and everybody… that she intended to have you Baptized into The Roman Catholic Church… Jesus… I thought your Grandmother might strike her down where she stood! I bet you being less than a month out from being born might likely have saved her from my Mom’s wrath.”

Holloway ran a hand through his hair. “As I said, they didn’t always see eye to eye… but Mom & Dad respected Mary, way more than I think even she realized and certainly more than Peter. She always knew you and Erin would be cared for… Peter was the only one left in the dark on that one.”

Lucas

Molly smiled softly, nodding, accepting her uncle’s answer. Her hand mindlessly clutching her mother’s necklace hidden under her tunic. Knowing that her mother knew what awaited both her and Erin, somehow brought her peace.

Knowing his beloved Mary’s necklace was finally, at long last, where it belonged also brought Lucas eminence peace.

“I don’t know how much free time you have, but… help me sort this whole mess out… after that let me talk to Calvin. Give me a week… stay on board… And I’ll go with you. I’ve been away for too long. I miss the days we would spend exploring the house in Chesterfield… I want to go back. What do you say?”

Holloway grinned widely and nodded. “Whenever you like Gracie. Your bio-signatures were never removed from the Security Net at Falcon Crest (OOC: The formal name of the Chesterfield house), so either of you could have come home at any time with no issues what so ever.”

“In the meantime…” Molly sighed. “I have to get Calvin back on my side… if I don’t… I might just leave the Dresden all together, or… face prison for the rest of my life. I really don’t care.” She gave her uncle a sad smile. “Can you help me put together our old flat in Elmhurst on the Holodeck? Let’s say I’m not the best when it comes to programming…”

Molly

With a solemn nod, Lucas kept the slightest hint of a respectful and knowing smile. “I’d be honored Gracie.”

Lucas


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