Posted by Lieutenant Nathan Harland (Counselor) in Location Unknown - Miracle On Ice

Posted by Lieutenant Nathan Harland (Counselor) in Location Unknown - Miracle On Ice

Posted by Ensign Chloe Harland (Nurse) in Location Unknown - Miracle On Ice
Posted by… suppressed (3) by the Post Ghost! 👻
10 Months Ago, Martha’s Vineyard

“Mommie!” came a sound from behind them as Nathan and Chloe turned to hear what the commotion was. In that simply word everything seemed to change, the silence cracked as Nathan saw Maddie and Logan running across the pond, flowers tight in his daughter’s grip as Nathan’s mind began to switch gears. No longer did it matter what Chloe had said or did, the center of the ice wasn’t safe, Logan should have known this but now the pair were running as if it was no big deal. The stomping of little feet cracking and bending the ice underneath.

“Dad doesn’t care about your flowers. He wants to play hockey with me,” Logan yelled chasing after Maddie. Why did she always have to try and be the center of attention? Their dad said just a second. He was coming to play hockey not fuss and moan over some stupid purple flowers.

“Nathan?” Chloe felt all the blood drain from her body as she repeated his name. Nausea swept over her as it does anyone who can see a future that is going to end in tragedy. The first repetition of his name was in question form. Maybe she was wrong. Maybe the ice was not as weak as she thought. It was bitter cold and the dead of winter in Massachusetts. Maybe it was just her motherhood paranoia at work.

“No!” Nathan shouted as he began running towards the pond leaving Chloe where she stood as he began to make his way to his children, fearing each second as he raced to get to the children.

As the kids watched, it would seem less of an angry father and more of one trying to play, at least Logan hoped as he let go of his sister’s hand. “Daddy watch!” Logan shouted as he smiled wide, his father wasn’t going. He was coming to see them both, it wasn’t ever as bad as it seemed.

“Nathan!” The second repetition of her husband’s name had a panicked and strained quality to it. Nathan had not yelled or engaged his children from shore as was typical when they called out the classic watch me phrase. Instead, he was running full bore towards them hyper-focusing on a single point. “Nathan… get them,” Chloe began to chase after him feeling an icy cold rush engulf her body. “Logan…Maddie, stop,” she yelled out not sure if this was good advice or bad.

“Watch Dad. I learned how to butterfly,” Logan yelled knowing his dad would be far more impressed with this new skill than some half-frozen flowers. He just needed to grab Nathan’s attention first. Sliding to a stop on the ice, Logan dropped to his knees and spread them slightly outward. This maneuver in hockey was called the butterfly. It was a style of protecting the goal where the goalie dropped to their knees to cover the lower half of the net with their leg pads. Logan smiled as he dropped feeling his knees impact the ice. He had performed the trick perfectly except they were not in the local ice rink where the depth of the frozen water was only a few inches over a layer of concrete. Logan had performed the maneuver where the depth of the frozen water was only a few inches over a layer of liquid water. As soon as his knees impacted the ice, Logan could feel it start to crack and separate. The impact of his knees was just enough to crack the surface and shatter the thin icy covering. “Dad,” Logan yelled feeling panic bubbling over in his body. “Dad,” his voice took on a shriller more high-pitched tone as Logan felt the ice break free. Lunging his body forward, Logan laid flat like Nathan had taught him, spreading his bodyweight out over a larger surface and slowly crawling away from the gaping gash that was behind him threatening to suck him down into darkness. “Help me,” Logan’s panicked voice yelled out as he reached a hand up toward Nathan’s form running towards him.

It would be years later for Logan to understand exactly why Nathan did not stop to help him. All he wanted was for his dad to scoop him up into his strong arms and hold him tight. Instead what Logan felt was Nathan’s hand closing around his wrist and yanking Logan harder than he had ever felt from his spot on the ice and whipping him back towards the shore. In a different time or place, this action might have been fun but right now it just added to the fear Logan Harland was experiencing. The movement was so fast, everything was a blur. At first, it was due to the tears fogging up what Logan could see. Then it was his mom’s black coat that he was being pressed into as she took him into her arms screaming over and over for Nathan to find his sister.

Now - En Route to Teller Industries Medical Facility

“Computer begin recording,” Nathan said as he began to fly the shuttle from the Sabre to the location Aedan had purchased. The medical facility wasn’t as well known as many of Aedan’s other assets, but it had become a lifesaver for Nathan’s sanity in the months to come.

“Clo Bell, I am not sure if you will get this message before I return, I hope I return with great news… but I know you deserve to know how everything happened… why I haven’t always been the man you married for the last part of a year… it all started that day… I hate that day, I can’t sleep without seeing it… every second in perfect memory… but, maybe this makes up for all of that… maybe I won’t be a monster if I can just save one life.”

10 Months Ago, Martha’s Vineyard

Maddie froze feeling the ice beginning to break under her feet. “Mah,” was all Maddie could get out before it felt like a thousand bees began to sting her body. Panic forced her to move her arms but the sting of the frigid water made her limbs feel thick and numb. Opening her mouth to scream, icy water filled it. Instead of just closing her mouth and holding the water there as she did in their swimming pool, Maddie inhaled feeling her lungs begin to burn for a breath. The frozen water quickly filled her lungs. Looking up Maddie screamed again releasing only a cascade of bubbles from the little air she had left in her body. The site of a ceiling of ice above her sent Maddie into a frenzy. She was drifting away from the spot where she fell in and could not break through the mirror-like surface of ice preventing her from taking a breath. The more she fought and struggled the more icy water filled her lungs until her kicks and struggles began to lessen. Her vision was starting to go black as her now weighted-down clothes and shoes, were dragging her to the bottom of the pond.

The splash of the water echoed in the trees as Nathan went in headfirst as he began to dive. She was dropping fast, too young to swim in a pond this deep, weighted down with all the winter clothing. Nathan’s own coat and shoes had been shed just moments before littering the ice as he felt the icy knifes sting all around him as he went in. He could barely see anything, the ice made everything dark but her pink coat shined bright enough as he grabbed on and began to pull himself back upwards to the surface.

For Nathan, this all seemed to be an eternity, but in fact, it was less than a half-minute of time underwater. For water this cold, for one that small and young, it might as well have been an eternity. As he broke the surface he began to swim to the edge of the ice as he hoisted her on top, his own body freezing and feeling numb as he climbed up on top.

“Maddie,” Chloe let out a small sigh of relief seeing Nate pull the familiar pink jacket out of the water behind him. “Oh, my god baby.” Her happiness faded as she realized there were no sounds or movements coming from her young daughter’s body. “Nathan. Nathan what’s“

“Contact emergency line!” Nathan shouted to Chloe. His voice did not have the panic the rest of the family was showing. Instead, it was the calm tone he used in the hospital when dealing with a medical crisis.

“Nathan,” Chloe looked at him shocked and unable to process what was happening before her eyes. Normally Chloe slipped into the same professional detached demeanor her husband was displaying yet this was not a stranger. This was her baby, nonresponsive, blue, and lying on the ice. Every muscle in Chloe’s body was frozen as cold and numb as Maddie’s. “Maddie. Maddie,” Chloe called out praying what she was seeing was a dream.

He looked over before his eyes glanced down at the small black debris behind her. Her personal com had been shattered by him in a fit of rage as he felt a numbness continue to move over him as he reached into his pants, releasing his own com just took a 10-foot plunge.

“I can’t find my phone,” she screamed patting down her body as if one was magically tucked in a hidden pocket. “I can’t find my phone Nate,” Chloe’s voice held the high pitch shriek everyone in the family was using as she watched in disbelief as Nathan began to move as fast as his frozen limbs would let him with their daughter’s body in his arms.

“Move, go inside contact there now!” Nathan said quickly as he took Maddie’s blue lifeless body from the ice to the shoreline.

“Logan go. Call emergency contact,” Chloe snapped yanking her son to his feet and shoving him towards the house. Her subconscious screamed for her to leave and do what Nathan asked but the sight of Maddie prevented her from doing so.

Chloe dropped to her knees as he began to unzip the coat as he prepared to do CPR. Chloe picked up Maddie’s limp hand and began kissing it and saying soft words as if trying to wake her from a deep sleep. Somewhere deep inside, Chloe felt a wave of despair engulfing her. Maddie’s pulse was non-existent as he took it in between reps as his mind began to blur. He felt his lips on hers, somehow colder than he felt in the ice as he kept doing more reps. “Come on Maddie come on!” Nathan shouted, a sting of tears falling down his cheeks. Icy cold trickles of water leaked from Maddie’s lips with each chest compression trying to start her heart. “One…two..three,” Nathan called out the cadence of CPR as he performed it.

“Nathan, it’s not working. Why is it not working?” Chloe’s voice was becoming more desperate as the reality set in all of Nathan’s attempts to revive his daughter was failing. The cadence filled her head like a buzz only to be replaced by the sound of the emergency contact team beaming into space around them.

Now - En Route to Teller Industries Medical Facility

“I have lived with a hatred of myself for a long time after that day, I was angry… I shattered your phone which… every second counts in a moment like those, and I didn’t think to take mine out… I… I should have known better. If I hadn’t have blown up, if I had tried to trust you more, if I had been there more… work devoured me… it still does at times. I try to help the galaxy so much, and I let slip the people I love more than myself through my grasp… I hope you can forgive me of that mistake Clo bell, cause I don’t know if I ever will.” Nathan said as he felt a sting of tear begin to hit his cheek as he wiped it past his face.

Harland, CNS

10 Months Ago, Martha’s Vineyard

The siren sounded, as Nathan wouldn’t stop working on Maddie. He felt a pit of anger, he is a doctor, why didn’t he keep a medkit at their home? Chloe often wanted a separation of home and work, they just had basic tools, nothing to deal with a situation like this.

The wind continued to increase and whip about feeling like a stinging slap across their faces with each gust. A thin crust of ice was forming on Nathan’s water-drenched clothes lowering his body temperature even more as it froze over the top layer of his skin turning it a fiery red. His hair was freezing into stiff peaks as ice formed on the tips of his tousled dark brown locks.

“Sir we need you to step back from your daughter,” a woman said in a firm tone trying to allow her partner to move into the position Nathan was occupying. The man appeared to know what he was doing but the rhythm was slightly off with the chest compressions and the seal around the child’s lips when he tried to inflate her lungs was not secure. One look at him, and the woman responder knew he was slipping into the first stages of hypothermia. “Sir move back and let us do our work,” she repeated placing a hand on Nathan’s bicep to guide him away from the body. The instant the woman touched him, she began to realize there was more than one patient here. “Phillip,” she called out to her partner. The man was obviously not going to stop and she did not have the strength to move him. She also did not have the physical strength to support the father when his muscles began to give out due to the early onset of the circum-rescue collapse.

The woman who tried to pull him off he knew was there to help, but he felt he couldn’t stop in his desperation to revive his daughter before he felt a separate man pulling him off. “Sir we got this,” the second voice said yanking hard. In Nathan’s state, the father was not a physical match for Phillip. Nathan stumbled back a step as the woman began to triage Maddie and continue with CPR. “We need some info to treat her,” he asked moving in front of Nathan as surreptitiously pulling out a tricorder to check Nathan’s physical state. “Can you tell me what happened? How long was she underwater?” Phillip kept the questions short, and concise.

“Mommie what’s wrong with Maddie,” Logan cried hanging onto his mother’s leg as Mara sobbed hysterically on Chloe’s shoulder. Both children knew something was wrong yet only Logan was starting to understand the severity of it. Chloe could not focus on soothing either of her two other children because her mind was hyperfocused on the little girl in the pink jacket. Behind Chloe, two police officers had arrived on the scene sent from the dispatch. They had not been deployed from a concern over a crime but more that the responders had indicated it was a family with other small children. Someone needed to be present to ensure there was someone there to maintain control. Chloe vaguely was aware of their arrival but not enough to care. “Maddie…wake up,” Logan said softly before burying his head into Chloe’s thigh and crying. His face hurt as the tear dripped down his nose leaving a watery trail for the weather to chap and irritate his skin.

“Nathan....Nathan, do something,” Chloe yelled desperate for Nathan to do anything besides stand there and look at their child lying lifeless on the ice. The wind seemed to suck the words away as she spoke them. “Why aren’t you trying to save her? Chloe’s voice was angry and accusing. She had seen the look on his face before in the hospital when he had lost a patient. His expression grew neutral and his mouth pulled back in a tight line as his brain began to form the words he was going to have to tell the patient’s loved ones but this was not some patient. It was their daughter. “Nathan!”

The cries of Chloe seemed almost muffled, everything felt dark and cold all around him before his mind began to focus, they were asking him questions.

“Sir how long was she under the water,” the man repeated the question unsure if Nathan was preoccupied to answer it or if Nathan did not know the answer. “One minute....two minutes,” the man lead Nathan towards any answer. In truth, it didn’t matter how long the child had been underwater. The weather and conditions were making it nearly impossible for her to survive. He was only asking Nathan the questions to evaluate how the man was processing information.

“She… she felt into the pond, was under for 90 seconds… maybe two minutes before we got her out. We need a heating blanket and she has to breathe she isn’t breathing.” Nathan said it was as if the cold stopped his process of thinking, 10 years of school and he could barely remember anything at that moment.

The man glanced at his partner passing a silent look that spoke volumes. They would try everything to save the child but they may need to triage the situation so that the women did not also lose her husband.

“Control,” the woman spoke into a comm badge on her shoulder. “We have a child drowning and the father in the first stages of hypothermia or possibly Circum-rescue collapse. Sending the to Sacred Meadow. Have a team there stat.” Not wasting a second longer, the woman scooped up Maddie and began to move her towards the emergency shuttle they arrived in.

“Maddie…Maddie,” Chloe dropped Mara down the side of her body moving through the snow towards the limp body in the woman’s arms. Chloe reached out taking one of Maddie’s hands into her. The skin was as cold as ice and starting to mottle with the purple-blue lines of someone suffering cold exposure. “We need to get her into the house. Warm her up,” Chloe put one of Maddie’s frozen hands to her cheek trying to rub warmth back into it.

“Mrs. Harland we need to get her to the Emergency room. I need you to let her go,” the woman said trying to move the child away from the mother for transport.

“Okay,” Chloe nodded lost in a fog of thoughts and feeling a swell of relief. If they were transporting Maddie, it meant she had a chance to survive.

“Ma’am, we can only take one of you,” the woman said barring Chloe’s entrance into the shuttle. Even if she had been alone, the emergency team would not have taken Chloe with them. The father was going to need medical care before they took off and the team could not try to handle treating both patients and dealing with a mother slipping into hysterics.

“Then I am coming with you,” Chloe fought to push past the woman and climb into the waiting vehicle. The bulky clothes and gloves, prevent Chloe from grabbing the woman and shoving her from the hatch.

“Mrs. Harland, we are going to need you to step back,” one of the officer’s came up from behind wrapping a hand around Chloe’s waist to gently remove her from the door.

“No. Get off of meeee,” Chloe began to push at the officer’s hands locked firmly around her waist. “I am not leaving her.” The farther she was separated from Maddie, the more Chloe began to struggle. “Let me go. Maddie needs me,” Chloe began to kick and fight losing distance with each kick as the officer moved her back from the vehicle.

“Chloe,” another voice snapped as the second officer thrust Mara into Chloe’s arms. “Chloe you need to get Logan and Mara into the house. Nate can go with them. We will take you to Sacred Meadow but we gotta get Logan and Mara into the house…okay?”

The use of her name calmed Chloe slightly. Luckily Martha’s Vineyard was not a very huge city. The officers who arrived knew the family as most people did on the island. The two officers may not have been emergency medical professionals but they could see Nathan was not in much better shape than his daughter. How the man was staying on his feet was a testament to the sheer power of adrenaline. Nate’s skin was slowly turning more ashen and a thin layer of ice was starting to build up on the wet layers of fabric that clung to his body from rescuing his daughter. “Nathan is going to go with Maddie. You are going to go in the house and take the kids. I will then take you to the hospital…understand,” the officer began to give out orders in short, easy to comprehend sentences as they moved Chloe and the kids towards the residence.

“Nathan…Nathan don’t leave her alone,” Chloe pleaded, holding but totally ignoring Mara who was screaming at the top of her lungs as large tears streamed down the toddler’s face.

The scene around Nathan was turning into a fiasco. His wife screaming and fighting against the officers. His son standing in the snow looking so small and lost. His remaining daughter on the ground sobbing but not moving. The emergency control officers trying to get him and Maddie into the waiting vehicle.

“Sir....Nathan....Nathan,” the woman responder said snapping her fingers to get Nathan to focus on her instead of his hysterical wife. We can take one of you. You can come with us, you are a Doctor correct?” the woman said as she looked back between the two as Nathan nodded. In situations like this people reacted very unpredictably. She had no idea if Nathan would put up a fight about coming or if he would just slide into the back of the vehicle. What she did know was that if the father did not start receiving some help of his own, a second-team would be out here taking care of him.

“I am, I can help…” Nathan stated moving towards the vehicle. The woman nodded as her partner nodded as the two of them began to secure Maddie into the back of the emergency vehicle.

It was as if the heavens knew the tragedy that was befalling the family. A squall which was predicted for later that night kicked up from the icy ocean off to their right, graying the sky and increasing the wind from a breeze to strong gusts. A sparse shower of snowflakes began to fall from the sky coating the area. To the left the gaping maw that had swallowed their daughter was starting to re-ice over. In under fifteen minutes, the hole would ice over erasing from the landscape what had happened. Nature would repair itself yet what had occurred could never be scoured away so easily for the participants on the pond that day.

As Nathan entered, the man turned to look back at Chloe, “We are heading to Sacred Meadow Hospital… you can find us there.” he shouted before closing the door as Nathan sat down as he watched them as they began to apply the heating blanket after they removed all of the clothes from Maddie, soaking and dripping from the clothing. “We are starting to get a pulse but it’s weak. Let’s get her lungs cleared.” the man said as he got an elctropulminary chest tubes from behind him as he worked.

Nathan stood up, grabbing tools and helping as they moved along. Her skin wasn’t as blue, but the monitors were showing her signs were weak. He felt everything continuing to grow dark, his vision becoming more narrow before Nathan felt himself grow faint as he tried to brace himself on the wall.

“Sir I am going to need you to sit down” the woman said, “pulling out a tricorder and starting to scan him. Her suspicions were correct. The father had been under the frozen water too causing him to start slipping into circum rescue collapse. Luckily for everyone, Nathan’s injuries could be treated fairly easily. She just needed to calm the father’s anxiety and fear before he passed out. “Nathan…I need you to get out of those clothes. I need you to wrap in this thermo blanket.” she said as she tossed him a blanket as he began to follow as she said as he nodded. “You are suffering from circum rescue collapse and I need you to be okay for when we get to the hospital,” she said giving Nathan a shot of stimulant to keep his cardiac rhythms normal along with his mind sharp. “Take a few deep breaths for me,” she asked handing Nathan a small handheld respirator. Running a tricorder over Nathan, she let out a breath slowly she had not realized she was holding. His body temperature was returning to normal limits even if it was on the borders of hypothermia. Color was returning to Nathan’s cheeks as he took several deep breaths of oxygen out of the mask. The woman did not need to be a fully trained doctor to know that while Nathan Harland was rebounding from CRC, his daughter was not. Reaching into an overhead bin, she pulled down the spare set of scrubs they kept on board. “We are about to land. Can you get dressed? Your daughter wife is going to be there and you can’t put on your clothes again. Okay,” she said nodding still looking at Nathan’s movements to ensure the man was okay and not going to fall over unconscious the second he stood up.

Now - En Route to Teller Industries Medical Facility

“I don’t know if I ever told you about that fainting spell… so I wasn’t in a state to try to be the hero but you know that doesn’t usually stop me… that ride felt like an eternity. Everything was slow… and it never seemed like it took only three minutes to get to the hospital. By this point, she wasn’t showing anything… the doctor who saw her had nothing more than formality if I am honest… it had been too long… there was no brain activity at all.” Nathan said as he took a deep breath, as he began to bank into the atmosphere as he began to approach the planet.

10 Months Ago, Martha’s Vineyard

The sounds of the hospital both soothed and created an anxious rush in Chloe as she entered the pneumatic doors and then was hastily rushed to the rooms where husband and daughter were waiting. It had felt like an eternity since she left them but in reality it was only about ten minutes. True to his word, as soon as the pair of officers had gotten Chloe and the kids into the residence, he had swept her away to Sacred Meadow Hospital. Her family had been notified and were on route to take care of the kids which allowed Chloe to actually focus on only Nathan and Maddie. Turning a corner, she spied Nathan’s form behind large glass walls at the end of the hall. Seeing him in scrubs, pacing the room sent a wave of relief through Chloe. The scene meant Nathan had been able to treat her daughter. It also gave Chloe a sense of needed stability. Nathan in scrubs meant one thing: he was doing the job he was the best at which was saving lives in impossible situations. No longer needing directions as to where she was going, Chloe’s fast pace turned into a sprint as she ran down the hall. “Nathan....Nathan where is she,” Chloe yelled as she closed the distance between her and her husband.

Nathan saw Chloe coming down the hall as he ran to her as he put his arms around her as he held her tight. Chloe had held it together up until she left his body envelope hers. His arms began to crush her against him as if he was trying to physically hold together what they were losing in his embrace. No words spilled from his lips reassuring Chloe that things were okay and that Maddie was stable and resting in the room just beyond the doors behind them. “Nathan....Nathan I need to see Maddie,” Chloe felt her legs begin to grow watery as his embrace tightened more. Her worst fears began to bubble to the surface and her legs buckled yet Nathan held her up never once letting go. “Nathan…where is Mah,” she fought to get the words out as a cascade of sobs began to wrack her body. Her words were muffled as she pressed her face into his chest letting him take her back to the room he had been waiting in.

The ER admitted her immediately but no one had come out of the room since they began to treat her. Nathan knew that if there was good news, this wouldn’t be so long in the room. He didn’t tell Chloe this, but he suspected with her training she was just as aware.

The door opened as the Doctor stepped out, moving his mask aside he shook his head at the two. “Her involuntary functions are working with machines… but there is no brain activity that can be found. We tried cortical stimulants, nerpozone everything we could think of but she isn’t reacting… ” Nathan didn’t have time for the man to finish as he pushed him aside as he came in. Nathan had spent years as a surgeon, who specialized in neurology damage. The truth was he knew deep down he couldn’t do much, if there was no activity after a certain time they would need a miracle but he felt if he just tried himself it would work. He was her daddy, he always kissed all the boo boo’s away, he had to be able to kiss this one away too.

Chloe followed Nathan into the room and felt vomit rise to the back of her throat. Maddie was barely recognizable through the tubes, sensors, and monitors covering her body. Closing her eyes, Chloe took a deep breath before opening them. Focus, assess, and plan she said to herself pulling on her training to get her through the maternal reaction of breaking down and sobbing hysterically. Opening her eyes, life felt more balanced. Nathan was next to Maddie, reading a PaDD and adjusting monitors. This was a familiar sight and calmed Chloe more than any word or other action could. Nathan worked miracles every day for the nameless hundreds that came through the hospital’s doors seeking help when none was available. If he could save a stranger, he would save his daughter.

“Sir! There is nothing you can do.” the Nurse said as the Doctor shook her to let her know to not interfere. Nathan was known at this hospital, he had many patients he served as a counselor with for free in his spare time. If he thought he had a way, he should be allowed to try.

“So we try Peridaxon,” Chloe felt a weight being lifted as she moved into the zone of professional and out of the parent. “It’s used to retard synaptic degradation in a variety of degenerative neurological disorders so let’s stop the degradation and give her time to heal on her own.

“Mrs. Harland that is for neurological degenerative diseases. It is not going to work here. I’m sorry,” the young Betazoid doctor struggled to control the waves of emotion coming off the parents in the room.

“Don’t,” she yelled pointing a finger at him. “Don’t say you’re sorry. When is the last time you administered Polyadrenaline,” Chloe snapped. “It is supposed to be given every three to five minutes until the patient shows signs of improvement. When did you give her the last dose,” she felt her tone becoming increasingly agitated. They should have gone to Mass General where Nathan worked and not this hick hospital with cut-rate doctors who didn’t know their arse from their elbow about medicine.

Nathan seemed to be scrambling as everything failed, just like it did for the doctors. His gut felt like it had dropped, as he felt a hand on his shoulder pulled him aside. This face, this was a new face. “Sir… I am Doctor Reagor,” she said gently. “I know right now you think you are not interested in talking but I need to talk to you. They can’t help her but I might have a treatment.” Dr. Reagor was giving Nathan false hope but if she needed to get him to listen to her. Zeroing in on the keywords of they vs us and treatment might be enough to pull him away from his futile task and let something good come from the tragedy. These keywords should snap Nathan out of his parental frenzy and into the brilliant neurologist Dr. Reagor needed.

“She… isn’t going to be able to come back.” Again Reagor set the scene of what was occurring before leading him into the conversation she wanted to have. “Let your wife have a moment alone with Maddie while we talk,” the woman asked as she seemed to have a kind face as he looked back at Chloe whose face matched how he felt.

“Talk…?” Nathan said as he couldn’t understand what there could be to talk about. If this woman was going to say they needed to pull the plug she was insane. He knew donors could use Maddie, something he often hopped for in a sick way whenever he operated, but right now this was different. It was always different when it was your own.

Now - En Route to Teller Industries Medical Facility

“That was how I meet Doctor Reagor, Kimberly Reagor. She was a neurological specialist, like me… though she was more experimental. I let you alone with Maddie then, thinking I was about to tell the woman there was no way I was going to pull the plug. The truth was she had something else in mind… something that had almost no chance of success. You know me though, when did I ever scoff at no chance of success… it’s how I married you after all.” Nathan said with a small smirk at that statement, he always took chances even if they felt slim. Action moving forward, that was always his approach.

Nathan Harland, CNS

Chloe

10 Months Ago, Martha’s Vineyard

“Doctor Harland, I know this isn’t something you want to hear… but there isn’t anything this hospital can do for your daughter. I have seen it time and time again.” Kimberly said as she placed her hand on Nathan’s shoulder which seemed to incensed him as he moved her hand off him as he pushed her up against the wall as he pinned her as he put his finger squarely in her face. The flash of anger was understandable, the quickness surprised her as she felt the almost heat of he rage as it began to be directed at her.

“I don’t want to hear anything about what can or can’t be done. I have solved bigger issues… who the hell do you think you are to tell me anything.” Nathan said as he stepped back as he knew the optics of him right now would cause a few eyes to start looking over-concerned and worried for the young woman. “I can’t accept failure, not now… I won’t.”

“Good, cause I said there was nothing that this hospital can do, but I didn’t say there was nothing that can be done. I work for a man, he runs a company called CryoGen MediTech… you might remember him from Cestus, Aedan Teller. We are working on a project, one that might be able to save your daughter, but we need to work fast… she needs to be induced now.” Kimberly said as she got from the wall as she tried to hopefully calm down Nathan. Aedan hadn’t told her about his anger, it seemed something he might have wanted to mention she thought to herself. There was a reason Aedan said Nathan was one of the few people he would fear in a dark alley.

“CryoGen, didn’t you have those lawsuits against ethical practices?” Nathan said, he wasn’t wholly unfamiliar with the name, and Aedan reaching out didn’t quite surprise him. The timing seemed suspect, but right now he felt like he had a dangling chance of hope and he wasn’t going to wonder Aedan’s end game too much.

“Those have all been completed outside of the courts, and our tech can save her… but this offer comes with a catch. You will need to work with us, your expertise can’t be replicated…” Kimberly said, wondering if it was really needed to bring him along. Aedan insisted, but this had been her project. She didn’t want another hand working with her.

“If I know Aedan that isn’t the only catch, but I won’t work with Aedan lightly, I don’t trust him and if you work with him I trust you less. Crimes against science have been murmured more than once with CryoGen… always seems to vanish. If I am working on a project I am in charge of, you don’t have to ask permission I will contact Aedan myself and tell him that is the only way.” Nathan said as he looked back at the room with a pit of despair seeming to somehow grow deeper despite the hope he had just received.

“Chloe can’t know… she needs to believe Maddie died… cremated remains, biometrically altered to match Maddie… she will check them. I will get a release for her… but…” Nathan paused as he looked over at Kim with his piercing gaze. “If I find anything is not above board I will burn everything down, it’s not the first time I took out someone I was supposed to be an ally with… no harm will come to her…” Nathan paused as he took a deep breath. “Now please…” he said as he looked back a the room, “give me a minute,” he said as he moved away to tell a story that he prayed Chloe would believe. Why wouldn’t she, she was his wife and this was their daughter.

Now - En Route to Teller Industries Medical Facility

“That may have been the hardest moment of my life,” Nathan said as he began to bank, he knew they didn’t have long, maybe 30 minutes to landing as he took a deep breath. “Lying to you… I promised I never would, never had a reason to. Convincing you that we had to remove her from support… it all moved so fast, I knew you would try to leave screaming… you couldn’t see what they did as they took her… and coming back with an Urn… it felt like a slap to everything I stood for to make so many lies up. All I have been doing is lying since then. Lying to you, lying to myself to tell myself this was the right thing… lying to myself that my decent with CryoGen wasn’t darkening me, but I began to make choices I would have never made… but it was all for her… everything was always for her… see I could make us whole again… and I might be able to do that today…”

Harland, CNS

8 Months Ago, Martha’s Vineyard

Nathan had been nervous as he paced his home. His bereavement leave was due to end, and he already had been working to move his posting to a location to help his now brain-dead and presumed dead, daughter. A task only he was aware of, as he walked around his home feeling like a husk of himself as he tried to fix all the fires of his family and marriage. Logan hadn’t talked to them since the funeral, his selective mutism a coping mechanism Nathan was sure, whether to the shock of Maddie’s death, or his leaving for Starfleet once more.

“Get up Logan!” Nathan said as he banged on his son’s door to wake him up. He was going to be heading to his kindergarten class, something he knew he wasn’t going to be looking forward to but life was having to move on, and no one was going to give them a chance to breathe.

Can’t I have one more day to stay with you and mommy, he thought from behind the door as the sound of soft shuffling footsteps moved towards the door.

Logan opened up his door with his pj’s on, rubbing his eyes as he shook his head. It was clear he wasn’t excited as Nathan sighed deeply as he kneeled down as he lifted Logan up as he began to carry him. Logan was getting big for his age, but right now Nathan didn’t mind babying his oldest a little. “I know little man, I don’t want life to resume either. Doesn’t feel right does it?” he said to him as he leaned in to kiss his cheek as he tossed him on the couch. “Computer, turn on Crazy Sea Crustaion’s newest episode,” Nathan said as the show began to play.

Logan curled up on the couch pulling one of the soft throws down from the back and wrapping it around his body as the cast of ocean characters began their shenanigans on the screen. If there had been one thing that was good about the past month, it was that he got to watch more cartoons than he ever had. No one seemed to care what he was doing as long as he was happy and content. He wasn’t happy or content but still cartoons and computers all the time was fun.

“I will make you some breakfast, Mara can sleep in some more before but…” Nathan looked around and there was someone else missing besides the one that seemed to leave a hole in his heart right now. Chloe wasn’t up, she was always his tag team with the kids, but for the past two months, there had been little moving from their bedroom to the rest of the house.

Logan sat up and pointed to the sheld with the boxed cereal he had eaten almost exclusively for the past two weeks for breakfast.

Hearing his father’s response Logan crossed his arms and sat up on the edge of the couch trying to decide if he wanted to throw a fit over breakfast or not. So many things made him mad now it was hard to remember when he felt happy. He felt angry that only he was going to be forced to sit at the table and eat when everyone else could just come and go as they pleased. He was mad that his mommy did not get up or smile. He was mad his dad was always checking his phone or on the computer whenever he didn’t have to deal with him or Mara. He was mad that Mara still got to run around laughing and giggling like nothing was wrong.

Watching his dad set the food down on the table made Logan scowl. He did not want eggs, bacon and fruit cup. Logan wanted cereal and the sugary kind with corn puffs shaped like Captain Crustation and Second Mate squid marshmallows. His grumpiness only intensified as Nathan set the plate down calling him over. Sliding into the chair, Logan poked at the eggs shoving them around the plate instead of piercing them with his fork. I don’t want to eat this, he said in his head picking up the bacon instead. Looking at his Dad long enough got his attention which Logan then directed to the empty seat that Chloe normally occupied during family meals.

“I know sport,” Nathan said as he looked over at Logan who was slumped in his chair and seemed to look at his dad with a questioning gaze. “She just misses Maddie, we all do,” he said as he leaned over to kiss the top of his son’s head before making his way past him towards the master bedroom.

Logan waited until he heard the creak of stairs knowing his dad would be gone for a while now as he tried to wake up his mommy. At some point, his daddy would get his mommy downstairs but the time it took varied each day. Getting up from the table, Logan dumped his plate into the trash and pulled a chair over to the counter where he used it to get his box of cereal. Moving back to the couch, Logan opened the top and began to eat it out of the box. No one paid attention to details like they did in the past. Logan knew he had plenty of time to eat before needing to get the box back on the shelf.

The smell of bacon, coffee, and the creak of the top step forced Chloe’s eyes to open. In that briefest of seconds between her nightmares and waking into hell, Chloe felt a half-second of peace. It was fleeting and always crushed by a sound from the house: A footstep that could not be her daughters, a smell that was not something Maddie helped cook, a voice that was not wishing her good morning. All these sounds and more would never be made by Maddie Harland. Chloe felt her throat tighten and the urge to vomit as her vision blurred from the first batch of tears which started each morning.

“Come on Clo Bell baby… it’s far too late for you to still be asleep…” Nathan said as he began to enter the bedroom, but he knew that sound. It was a soft sound of sobbing that gut-punched Nathan as he felt everything in his body shatter.

“I dreamt of her again,” she said looking up at Nathan. “She was just trying to give me flowers but she never got them because,” Chloe did not need to finish with the rest of the nightmare as sobs choked out the words. The details didn’t matter. It was the same every night. Something cold or dark and Maddie desperately needing help that Chloe failed to give her. Chloe’s hair was askew over her face and thin strands were stuck to her cheeks, glued there by the tears that never seemed to stop except after she took her meds. Without Valium and Prozac, she could not function. The amount Nathan had started giving her only took the edge off, still letting her feel something. On the day of the funeral, Chloe took twice as much. She had hoped it would cause her to a blackout that part of the day but instead it just numbed her to the point of not caring about anything. With Nathan being a doctor, there were tons of prescriptions lying about. With Chloe’s being a nurse, she knew the labels and what each med did. It was not hard to supplement Nathan’s dose every twelve hours. The side effects of the narcotics such as drowsiness, loss of appetite, or confusion were easily explained away by the accident in January.

“Love…” he said softly as he came around to the bed as he got on top sliding next to her.

“Why didn’t I just stop to get her flowers,” Chloe looked up at Nathan like he had the answer to her questions. “Why did we take them to the pond? Why didn’t we go bowling or to the movies? Why did we let a fight stop us from taking care of her?” There were no answers to her questions. That day in January was nothing more than a tragic accident. No one was to blame no matter how much Chloe tried to heap it upon her and Nathan. They had skated on that pond a million winter days. There was no rhyme or reason as to why that day the ice would shatter their lives but somehow it had.

“Nathan I don’t think I can get up. I feel sick. I think I have the flu,” Chloe said rolling over so that her back was pressed tightly to his chest. She could not look at him. Seeing the pain in his eyes would crush the broken shards of her life into a dust so fine it could never be put back together.

Nathan began to place his hand on her forehead, she had been going through medications to stabilize her moods and he was worried some of them might have been having some allergic reactions to some. “You are a little clammy, but I think overall fine… we need to find you something better than those drug cocktails… the kids need you, baby… I need you.” Nathan said as he took her hand as he kissed the back of it as he closed his eyes to just let them have a brief moment of peace.

“I need her,” Chloe pulled her hand back hard. “I can’t just pretend this didn’t happen,” she sat up in the bed looking at him and feeling a rush of anger swell in her chest. Aside from the soul-crushing despair threatening to swallow her, Chloe was mad. She needed to direct her anger at something before it consumed her. Unfortunately, that meant Nathan was going to get the full brunt of it this morning. It was easiest to hurt the people you loved most because you knew where to plunge the knife into their back. “I am not you. I can’t just throw on a suit, head to the office and act as none of this happened. Nathan, it hurts to breathe,” she patted her chest feeling the catch of her breath as she tried to talk between sobs. “Every day I wake up and all I can think about is why did God do this to her. We were the ones that failed her. Why didn’t he take…” she stopped before filling in the one word she didn’t mean.

Nathan didn’t know how to fix anything, he was grasping at straws. CryoGen had Maddie for two months as he worked remotely with zero success. He had begun getting the transfers to OP 42 secretly, wanting to hopefully get Chloe to agree. He first had to get her to come to the Loki by the end of the week, which felt like a harder task than bringing Maddie back. The still empty bags at the end of their bed a clear sign she wasn’t even taking his requests seriously.

Nathan Harland, CNS

Now - En Route to Teller Industries Medical Facility

“I think back to those weeks after her death, I should have stayed… maybe told you the truth… perhaps forced your hand harder… I should have seen the signs. It was all there, you were hurt more than me cause you had zero hope. My hope was slim, bordering on zero, but there was still something even if faint. My desire to push to find a way to be a miracle worker was so hard. I began to resent my faith a bit… if God could bring his son back from the dead why couldn’t I bring my daughter. Those old dusty catholic lessons seemed to taunt me as everyone told me it was God’s plan. God didn’t have a plan from where I stood, he abandoned us and it was my job to work… and that work began to tear us further apart.” Nathan knew in his heart he could have saved his wife from her despair if he had just been better. That at least was the lie he always told himself. The truth was he was far too broken himself, and all his work on Maddie was all that kept him from losing what little grasp on his sanity he had.

Harland, CNS