Posted by Lieutenant Kate O’Neill (Chief of Security) in Greckens Quarters - Let’s keep this off the record please?

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“Are you just going to side step all that with a smirk and hope I do not notice love?” he said as he looked at her softly. He hadn’t asked much once she came back. He didn’t need to know, as long as it was in the past he was okay.

“Yep pretty much,” Kate said in a neutral tone nodding. “That is my plan.”

“I am just wanting to tell you I still love you, and I don’t want to just take a step back… I have wanted you since I was a young lad, and I still do.”

Grecken, Doctor

“Well then that should make our vacation go a lot smoother,” she said in a happy tone heading to his closet. “It would pretty much suck if you didn’t want to be with me.” Completely avoiding the topic, Kate began to throw several items of Shaun’s and her clothes on the bed.

“So should we tell our mom’s we are coming home or wait until the end and say we are only coming for a weekend,” she let out a laugh. “You know like that time we got liberty for a week at the academy but only told them it was for a weekend?” Kate and Shaun both loved to be with their families but that did come with its own issues. Kate and Shaun were an adult couple, yet because they were not married Kate’s father made it perfectly clear that when they were under his roof she and Shaun would not be playing house. The Grecken’s were no different in that respect. The first shore leave had left Kate and Shaun saying goodnight like they were sixteen-year-old sweethearts instead of staying together at one house like twenty-year-old cadets. They learned from that experience to take a few days before or after and shack up in a hotel before arriving home.

Lt. Kate O’Neill COS

“Stop…” Shaun with a serious look, “Look, I am asking you point blank… well you marry me… again. I nee this answer my love. I don’t want to go back to friends, or just lovers… I should have had your name be Grecken 18 months ago and I am not saying we go have a shotgun marriage tonight but… do you want this.” he asked her point blank, wanting an answer before they even begin.

“This… this evasion… feels a lot like when you left me at the altar”

Grecken, Doctor

“Evasion,” Kate said in a soft tone. “Try insecurity or apathy. Indifference or settling. Those words are more appropriate and the ones I worry you feel when you think about me,” Kate sucked in her top lip and bit it for a second as if to steady it.

“Shaun this is on me not you. I did this to us and even when you wanted to kill me and refused to talk to me for a bit I knew in my heart that you would find a way to forgive me. And you did but the thing that keeps me up at night is what did you forgiving me cost. Your trust for one,” Kate felt her chest tighten. She worked hard not to get emotional and continue to speak in a calm voice.

“And as much as I love you. As much as I believe you forgive me how can I ever think that the doubt I gave you,” she pointed a finger at him, “ won’t come back one day to bite me in the ass. Shaun you gave me everything and I threw it away with both hands thinking you would always be there. And you were,” Kate said in almost a desperate tone. “You hated me. You were mad at me. You wanted never to see me again but you still never left my side and maybe that scares me more than all the hurt and anger. Maybe I can’t get over the guilt from doing that to you.”

Crossing the room Kate wrapped her arms around his body and held him close to her. “All I have ever wanted was you. To be your wife. To have your kids. To get old and have a million grandkids we load up on sugar and send home with projects covered in glitter. I divided our family and hurt so many more than you and I. Do I want to be your wife? Yes. God yes. I would do it this second but ,” Kate shrugged. She could not find the words to actually say what she felt. The closest thing to it was ,” I guess I know I dont deserve you.”

Let Kate Oneill. Cos

“I forgave you love, and I forgot… you are going to have to believe me on that. I am looking for our future, the hiccup hurt but it isn’t who you are. I never will stop loving you.” he said as he kissed her forehead and held her close. He wasn’t about to let her go, he loved her beyond anything. “We can make this all work, I will never give up on you. I picked you, as a small boy I knew I wanted Katie O’Neill… my Katie Bug, and I was never for an instance going to settle on anyone else but you. We had our break ups here and there, others tried to come in but once we got serious, I was done pretending I wanted anyone else… cause I just wanted you.”

Grecken, Doctor