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Pre Sim - Trying to find herself again (CNS)

Posted Jan. 18, 2021, 6:43 a.m. by Lieutenant Alexandra "Little Sehlat" Primage (Pilot. Grn Squad Ldr) (Melissa Aragon)

Posted by Lieutenant Trevor Michaels (Counselor) in Pre Sim - Trying to find herself again (CNS)

Posted by Lieutenant Alexandra “Little Sehlat” Primage (Pilot. Grn Squad Ldr) in Pre Sim - Trying to find herself again (CNS)

Posted by Lieutenant Alexandra “Little Sehlat” Primage (Pilot. Grn Squad Ldr) in Pre Sim - Trying to find herself again (CNS)

SNIP

“Seems like you’re having quite the time, aren’t you?” Michaels asked rhetorically. The Counselor was aware of the Lieutenant’s last predicament but it wasn’t his place to tell her the ethical dilemma of dating one’s superior. Thankfully, they had the patient-counselor privilege protection working for them.

“Being angry is expected, but don’t let that consume who you are,” Trevor stated. “Mind control is more often involuntary, and it could have easily been me in your shoes if I had been in the wrong place at the wrong time, just as you were.” The Lieutenant thought back to their recent assignment and internally shuttered at the thought of how close he actually came to being victimized.

“I’d have to say you’re wrong if you try to blame yourself for your recent actions,” Trevor added. “You may have been aware of what was going on around you, but there was no way to prevent what your body did while it wasn’t under your control.

Michaels
CNS

She shook her head and scoffed. “So I’m just supposed to accept that every time I leave the ship, or hells, every time I leave my quarters, I may be taken control of and just deal with it? Somehow I don’t think that’s an order I can obey, Sir.” The final words more acerbic than necessary but she wasn’t ready to accept that she wasn’t going to have any say over possibly killing herself or her crew mates. She could accept a lot of things. This just wasn’t one of those.

“Isn’t there some beta blocker, or mind meld that can be done so my brain isn’t accessible that way? I mean, I never hear of Vulcans, or Betazoids ever being taken over and nearly killing one another. So there has to be something I can do to keep from being a risk to Ric, or anyone else again.” She was so desperate, so upset, and feeling so helpless, she wasn’t aware her CAG had suddenly become a first name significant part of her sharing.

Xandra
Pilot
(yup… not good at therapy lol)

1.8.21

The Counselor shook his head. “If there was a sort of therapy we could go through to make us less susceptible to mind control, we would have already gotten it,” Trevor said blankly. Lieutenant Michaels wasn’t sure how much progress he’d be able to make in just one session but was sure Xandra was more angry at herself for what she did to Ric, than her mind being taken over.

“Listen, Lieutenant,” Michaels said. “You’re only going to make progress if you allow yourself to, so your first step might be to talk with Commander O’Shea..... and get some closure over the incident.”

CNS

Xandra imagined how that conversation would go. How does one ‘get over’ nearly being strangled to death by their lover? Or, for that matter, how does one get over doing the strangling. The thought left her exhaling a short laugh. “Oh yea… I’m sure he’ll love that conversation.” The sarcasm dripping in her response wasn’t even attempted to be hid.

Standing up and pacing, unable to remain seated, Xandra took a dozen steps around the room. “How do you start a conversation like that? Sorry, sweetheart. I know I tried to kill you but I honestly didn’t mean it. I can’t even say that I promise it won’t happen again? I mean, cause it has. Happened before. Granted, last time I just tried to slam my own fighter into the ground and not hurt anyone else. But still.” She paused, hands resting on the back of the chair. This was getting her no where. She was starting to wonder why she had agreed to this in the first place. No one could say it wouldn’t happen again… so what was the point?

Xandra
(a little… off)


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