Posted by Lieutenant Commander Jarred Alindor (Chief Engineer) in Kalani’s Quarters

Posted by Ensign Kalani Kāne (Scientist) in Kalani’s Quarters

Posted by Lieutenant Commander Jarred Alindor (Chief Engineer) in Kalani’s Quarters
Posted by… suppressed (1) by the Post Ghost! 👻

<snip>

“I… I don’t know. I mean… yes I never had kids on the plate love. At all, neither did Lilly. To be honest, I haven’t really had anyone I even had a chance to think about that with. After Lilly it was Ayla but that ended about as soon as it began, and I loved Cori but… I can’t really have a child with her. There has been a few other even smaller flings, but everyone was either fleeting or just… not right. No one I have been with has ever wanted to bring that conversation back up.” Jarred said, it was about as honest as he knew himself to be right now.

“I know this, I love you. Kids… they weren’t in my plans back then but time has gone and passed. I hated Lilly for leaving me, dumping Elizabeth on me, my father for all his pushing and nagging and demanding. I put so much on everyone else but I made my choices, and they weren’t great and they were not right but they were mine. So yes, I would love to have a crack at being a father, and maybe a....” Jarred paused as he felt himself flush as he took a deep gulp as he looked her right in the eyes. “Maybe even a husband to you. So yes, I want kids, and I want you… and I couldn’t imagine anyone more suited to help me through this path.

Alindor, CE

“Except maybe your family: Your Mom, Your Dad. I will be here for you but I am not the one most suited to help you down this path. Your family is the one you need to lean on more than me.”

“Only difference is they are going to be gone… I can’t rely on them forever.” he said as he bowed his head softly. In many ways he was on his own here, even with Kalani. She wasn’t obligated to do anything, and part of him felt like he had no right to even begin to ask her any of this.

“Jarred…baby I love you but you know nothing about Elizabeth except from the questions you have asked and the specific answers you have received. I can fire off a litany of what’s her favorite color, movie, song, food and you can answer each one of them but there is so much more to raising a kid than that. Do you know the answers to the subjective questions like you do the concrete ones? Do you know what Lizzie does to push your buttons? Do you know how to handle her when she does? Do you know if she actually wants to live with you? Not the lip service you get over a call or the promises made after the few days of leave you give her what once…twice a year? Does Lizzie beg and dream of giving up everything she has ever known to live on a starship with a man she barely knows?”

“Oh God no, I don’t know anything love. Why do you think I am so nervous. I want to do right by her, I do. The only issue is I am flying blind as can be here. I am going to have to have crash courses on everything. I don’t think this is ideal at all but… it’s the right call. I know that, a child needs their father… even ones as terrible as I am. I can do better… I have to do better for her sake.”

Kalani knew her words were harsh. She felt a slight twinge of guilt for saying them yet throughout Jarred’s story one theme was explicitly clear. Lizzie’s life was on Earth and Jarred for all his love and attention was more like an uncle than a father. “Would you be taking her if your father had not become ill? I have no doubt you love her and only want the best for her but this thing between you and your father has got to be mended because he is going to need you in ways you can’t imagine and you will need him to be the best father you can for Lizze.”

“Yes, I did. I wasn’t sure how, about a month before we meet I had a holocall with her. Asking her what he day was and I tried to have one once a week from then. She… she seemed eager to talk at first but part of me thinks my mom just forced her. Still, I have needed to do this for her for a long time. My father’s illness just forced the point. Lilly doesn’t know he is dying, they are moving to a facility to care for him and she can’t be there. I even told my mom I wanted to be the one to talk to her on this, that’s how I know I am the last on the list. Peter, Lucy… her best friend Candice family… she even tried to see if it was okay to just go to an orphange, she had been reading Annie and thought that sounded better than it was.” Jarred looked at her with a feeling of forlorn, he wasn’t sure how to explain the feeling of your daughter wanting to live anywhere but with you.”

Kalani felt her heartbreak for Jarred. Even past all the extenuating circumstances and maybe avoidances dealing with Lizzie, Jarred was still an officer in Starfleet. People did have families but not like the rest of the galaxy. Rarely if ever did extended family live with them so visits were relegated to twice a year things in the best of times. Spending two weeks every six months with your grandparents

Kalani reached out her hand hoping Jarred would take it. “I am here for you. I am not going to cut and run even when this gets tough because it is going to get tough. I just think we need to rely heavily on your family to help this transition go as smooth as possible. I will be here to pick you up or talk you down,” she gave him a half smile, “but it is your mom and dad that you need to lean on. Once we get our sea legs at this parenting thing, that may change but for right now, you are going to have to defer to them at times even when it is the last thing in the world you may want to do.” Maybe all the years of impromptu counseling sessions at the dinner table made this clearer in Kalani’s mind than it did in Jarred’s. All Kalani knew was that in the time Jarred had left with his father, he needed to try and reconcile on 30 years of real and perceived wrongs. It was a huge task but she would be there as long as he wanted her.

Ensign Kalani Kane science

“Hon I am going to rely on everyone… but you are important. I know you are odds are as nervous as me. You are going from a girlfriend to… well not a mom but… close. As close as you have been outside of caretaker to your animals. I can understand you being scared, I wouldn’t find it odd if you haven’t but as much as I am going to rely on their advice I have to do this here and now. Part of the includes you yes… a large part in fact. In the end, though you can be as close or as far as you need to be. I don’t want to make you feel you have to plunge headfirst. I just want you to know as much as I am going to be there for Elizabeth I am going to be there for you, this doesn’t change that.” Jarred said as he took her hand in his own as he kissed it gently.

Alindor, CE

Kalani moved in closer to Jarred and placed her lips on his. She had a million more questions and yes she was scared to death but Kalani knew that she loved the man sitting next to her. Nothing he could say or do would change that. An involuntary shiver ran down her back as she adjusted her body so that she was sitting on his lap, now leaning him back into the couch cushions, and kissing him softly. Their future was always uncertain since the day they met but it was an excited uncertainty. Like Christmas morning where you were given a gift that was a total surprise but you loved it. A soft moan escaped her lips as she let herself think only about him. Moments like this would be rarer in the coming weeks and years and she wanted to enjoy every second of them. Unlike other nights, this kiss, however, led to her lay her head on his shoulder. His hands found the back of her head and slowly stroked her hair. A week ago a kiss like that would have led security to think the quarters had been tossed. Tonight it ended in both of them just holding each other on the couch. At times, just being held by someone you loved felt better than anything else in the whole universe. Only someone that truly loved you could wrap their arms around you like that and make the world blur.

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24 hours later on the shuttle

“Daddy said he finished building the aquatic pond he has been working on in the science department. He promised to show me but said that no fishing was allowed,” Elizabeth Alindor giggled squirming in her seat.

“If he promised I am sure he will be there. He… he tends to be good to his word when he wants to be.” Jonathan said as he tried to smile at Lizzie, part of him wasn’t sure this was best but he knew him and Samantha couldn’t take care of her and he couldn’t deny Jarred had been seeming to change over time. He still loved his granddaughter, and feared what these changes might do to her.

“PaPa is right but what you don’t know is just how excited Daddy is to get to show you his home. Remember the last time he came to visit and how excited you were to show him your room,” Samantha said smoothing over the edge of anxiety that hinted on her husband’s tone of voice.

“Yeah,” Elizabeth laughed scrunching up her nose in disgust as she shook her had and said, “pink,” in an attempt to imitate Jarred. Then she broke out in a fit of giggles. “I know Daddy loved my room but that face he made was so silly. It makes me laugh when I think about it. Daddy can be funny....when he wants to,” she said getting a bit more serious as she let a half glance slide towards her PaPa. Lizzie did not always understand why grown-ups got so grumpy at times. She knew why her Nana, PaPa, and Daddy got grumpy with her. It was usually because she was doing something she wasn’t supposed to. It was harder to understand why her PaPa got grumpy with her Daddy and vice versa. PaPa and Daddy were both adults. Adults didn’t get into trouble. Her Aunt Lucy explained it the best one time. She told Lizzie that PaPa was Lizzie’s Daddy so it a Daddy could always get grumpy with his kids even if his kid was all grown up. Still, Lizzie hated when everyone got grumpy so she tried extra hard to agree with everyone sometimes so that no one felt she liked anyone else more. Nana wanted her to be happy. Daddy wanted her to want to be excited to live with him. PaPa wanted her to behave like a good girl. Elizabeth just wanted her Daddy to move back to Earth so she could live with all three of them.

Samantha smiled at her granddaughter. Lizzie was a good kid. She was feisty like her aunt but also very easy going like her father trying most things without complaint and a fearless determination to succeed. She was happy to see Lizzie excited about seeing Jarred. When they first told her they would be coming to the Saracen, Elizabeth had gone through bouts of happy excitement to tantrums and tears over the past few weeks. They worked through these emotions with calm patience. It was a catch twenty-two for them. They wanted Jarred and Elizabeth to be a normal family with dinners, homework, and sporting events but for that to happen it meant the had to give up their granddaughter. For six years, Elizabeth had given them a chance to be parents again but without all the hassles of trying to do it while raising two other kids and pursuing their careers. Even though this change was for the best, it still was hard to do.

=/\=Shuttle will be docking on the Saracen in three minutes,=/\= a voice rang out overhead in the cabin. This made Elizabeth wiggle, even more, leaning across her PaPa to catch a glimpse of her new home out of the window.

“Daddy is going to be waiting for us right,” Lizzie said in a happy tone. The closer she got to the ship the more Lizzie settled on her own. Snuggling up her PaPa’s arm Lizzie looked up at him. “The ship is awful big Daddy is going to be there right?”

Lizzie Alindor

“Yes, he will be there. He was always fairly punctual, so I highly doubt baby he will miss you. Did you get him the gift you made? If you want you can give it to him when we get out.” he said leaning down to kiss the top of her forehead. He had to admit he could feel the age catching up to him. Even so he couldn’t help but feel worry a bit as all this was folding out.

Jonathan Alindor

“Yes,” Lizzie said diving out of her seat and towards the small pack stored on the floor of her seat.

“Elizabeth,” Samantha said reaching forward to pull her granddaughter back into the seat. Unfortunately, as things tended to play out in real life, the shuttle took that second to land causing Elizabeth to spill out of her seat and onto her head.

“Nah Nah,” she said breaking out into a bout of tears. “I hurt my head.” As Samantha pulled her from her the ground, Lizzie curled up on her shoulder sobbing and hiccuping trying to get her breathing under control.

=====================
Hangar Bay USS Saracen

“Don’t be nervous,” Kalani said cracking her knuckles as she watched the shuttle touch down on the deck. “There is no reason to be nervous. It is just your mother, father, your daughter you haven’t seen in months. It is going to be fine,” Kalani said tucking a long strand of hair behind her ear before grabbing Jarred’s hand. She entwined her fingers in his and then shook his hand free. The don’t be nervous and things will be fine pep talk was not entirely for Jarred. Kalani had not been this nervous in a long time. They had discussed whether or not she should meet his family in the hangar bay. Kalani was thrilled Jarred wanted her to be there but terrified also hence the holding his hand and shaking it free from hers. “We got this okay,” she said turning to face him.

As the shuttle door opened, Kalani’s attention snapped immediately to the people exiting the ship. Her smile fell as she saw a small girl being carried out of the shuttle sobbing.

Locking eyes with her son, Samantha instantly updated them as she descended the ramp. “She just bumped her head Daddy,” Samantha assured Jarred. The sound of her Daddy’s voice brought Elizabeth’s head off her Nana’s should and swiveling to find Jarred.

“Dahhhh dee,” Elizabeth squealed fighting to get out of Samantha’s arms. Pushing off her Grandma, Elizabeth half fell as she landed on the ground and bolted towards Jarred with a smile on her face. The bump that two minutes earlier had sent her into a fit of tears was now forgotten as a smile spread across her face.

Elizabeth Alindor