Posted by Commander Roman Alden (First Officer & Chief Science Officer) in side-sim: The Reckoning

Posted by Ensign Rand Farquharson (Yeoman First Class) in side-sim: The Reckoning

Posted by Commander Roman Alden (First Officer & Chief Science Officer) in side-sim: The Reckoning
Posted by… suppressed (8) by the Post Ghost! 👻

(snip)
The next day she arrived early for lunch. Roman’s last scan was that day, and she promised to go. So she walked in set a lidded cup of hot black tea on his desk and then went about feeding Nibbles before everyone left to eat.

Rand

“You’re early,” Roman commented when Rand walked in early for lunch. He took a sip of the tea she left on his desk and set a stack of daily reports on the edge for her to take later. He’d been trying so hard to keep it out of his mind, Roman had forgotten about the last scans. If Rand didn’t make him go, he’d probably try and skip the appointment. His tendency to do that was noted just like his noncompliance.

~ Roman

“Yes, Sir.” Rand said with a grin. “Reports from command were short today. So I thought I would come see Nibbles early.” In truth Rand didn’t want to miss her time with Nibbles since Roman’s appt was during lunch. She would gladly do so but after missing so much time due to injuries and landing parties, Rand didn’t want to miss out with Nibbles. Also, Randy had set it up that way so Roman couldn’t claim to be busy. Randy might not be Roman’s yeoman any more but he was aware of the schedule his sister kept. He knew Roman spent that hour with her. Rand was also exhausted running on maybe 2 hours of sleep. She figured if she sat in her quarters or her office she’d fall asleep and who knew when she’d wake up.

Roman busied himself with paperwork. Over the remainder of the week, he’d mostly caught up but there were still a few things on the backlog he wanted done. He’d spent the morning cleaning the animals’ enclosures and doing his normal observations. Then he’d had to run down to the chemical lab. He still had a few of today’s reports to do, too.

When everyone had filed out, Rand finished up with Nibbles and then walked over and leaned a hip against his desk. “Come on. Let’s get it over with so it’s done. Then we don’t have to go back.”

Rand

Everyone else filed out of the lab and Rand headed over. He was reminded exactly what he was avoiding with all the paperwork and he glanced up at her and gestured to it. “I was going to work through lunch today, finish out the backlog,” he said. It was a bit of a fib, he’d never give up his time with her normally, but Roman would do nearly anything to avoid his Sickbay appointment. “And I’ve still got today’s to do. I’m sure they can wait on their pictures of my leg or whatever.” Roman would always claim to be busy when Sickbay was involved. It was usually the most successful excuse, not to mention the best one that had nothing to do with not liking Sickbay. “And then, I’ll have to go to the planetary lab. You know we’re orbiting a gas giant? They’re doing tests on the planet’s chemical makeup. Then I need to head to engineering, they said they needed my XO attention for something.” They were all things that actually did need doing but he was fudging their urgency just a tad, to get out of the appointment.

~ Roman

Rand pulled her chair closer and sat down. “Those reports from today can wait.” She flipped through the ones he had set on the corner of the desk for her. “And judging by these it will only take me 15 minutes to compile them and then you sign. So you’re making work.” He was only going to work through lunch because he didn’t want to go. “I can’t order you to go, but if you don’t two things will happen. First Elbbirt will come looking for you and he’ll make you miserable with endless daily, maybe more than daily, scans and appointments. Second you’ll have skipped a meal, and you know what Randy did the last time he caught one of us skipping meals. So let’s avoid both of those. Oh, and third, you’re the XO so you have to set the example. You don’t want a whole crew refusing to listen to orders and show up for appointments, sickbay or otherwise.”

Rand called him on ‘making work’ as she called it, and Roman shook his head. “If there’s nothing to scan for, he’ll have no reason to bring me in daily,” Roman interjected, getting stubborn to avoid it. “And Randy won’t know what I’ve skipped if he’s not told, will he? He’s got more important things to do than monitor my eating habits.” Rand’s third point made Roman pause, he was supposed to set an example. But… “No one knows about the appointments, so no one will know I’m skipping it, except for Elbbirt and Randy.” Roman was being really stubborn about it, and that would tell Rand how he felt about it. “I’ve still got to go see Engineering and the planetary labs, even if you can speed through all the paperwork.”

She set the reports down. “Engineering doesn’t need you right now, just before the end of Beta shift. The planetary lab just wants to share their results with you and ask for extra time to study the gas giant. They are very excited about it. If something emergency comes up Farnks will handle it while you are at your appointment or he will come get you if he can’t.” She carefully took his hand, after making sure no one was around and her voice dropped. “But most of all, clots could kill you, you almost died, and I can’t stand that. A few pictures to make sure they are gone, and I’m going with you. And once Elbbirt sees they are gone he’ll leave you alone.” She had to work to keep her voice from wavering and giving away how much it scared her at how sick he had actually been. And they hadn’t known. There was only one other thing she could think to say but it was more attitude than helpful so she didn’t.

Rand

Leave it to Rand to know exactly what was going on around the ship. “What if they found something really groundbreaking and they wanted me to see it right away?” Roman said, still stubbornly trying to get out of going to Sickbay.

Rand didn’t sigh, but she was tempted.
It was going to be like that then. “Planetary sciences isn’t your expertise, so even if they do find something ground breaking to share with you, you will have to defer to Sarnak. You know, your planetary sciences expert on board. The one you fought to so hard to get assigned to Sentinel. And whatever it is can wait 15 to 30 minutes. And our computer record everything the sensors pick up so it’s not like you can’t get an instant replay.”

Then Rand looked around, as if making sure everyone was really gone, and took his hand. Her voice sounded a little tight, like she was putting effort into keeping it steady, and he looked at her and gave her hand a little squeeze. ‘Almost died’ felt like a bit much. He could admit he was lucky he hadn’t almost died, but as of yet, no clots had made it anywhere important or even caused the hot spots Elbbirt had warned of. But Rand was right that they could kill him, and that did worry him, but he still couldn’t make himself go. He was downplaying it to himself, to justify not going back. He looked guilty, he knew it all stressed her out and he hated to cause her worry but he couldn’t make himself agree. The idea was incredibly off-putting in a way he couldn’t describe.

~ Roman

Rand sat there just looking at him. She wanted to yell at him. That if he still had blood clots floating around and they weren’t taken care of the work would still be waiting when he was dead - for someone else to do. And though it was true, Roman would only think she was being dramatic; Rand had seen the images over Elbbirt’s shoulder though. She shouldn’t have but she had watched and one particularly large one had been far too close to his heart for her. She’d delved into medical database, reading everything she could, and had only scared herself. She could see the guilt on his face, knew he felt bad. She knew how hard it was to choose to go. She had two choices. The second she was saving as a very very last resort.

She stood up, her voice schooled to indifference she didn’t feel at all, but her eyes only held understanding. “Okay, Cmdr. But you aren’t leaving me any choice. Section 3 paragraph 5.a of the Star fleet code of conduct for officers clearly states that all officers are to report for yearly physicals, submit to routine innoculations, report any injury or illness for evaluation, and follow all directions given by the medical officer no matter their rank or position. To ensure this Paragraph 5.b states that in matters of personal health safety and that of the crew, the medical crew out ranks all officers to ensure that rank and position can not be used to ignore those orders. It allows medical officers to relieve anyone of duty for not following medical orders or for being found unfit, up to dismissal from Star Fleet.” Rand sighed. Her heart was racing and her vision was tunneling and her palms sweating. She was having to force herself to breathe slowly. She might be right, but she hated it.

No, no, no. Not the regulations… Roman knew she was right. He was sure Elbbirt wouldn’t dismiss him from Starfleet… most likely. He’d claim he forgot. That was another excuse he often used. But he was sure Elbbirt would find some way to either annoy him or get him in trouble. By the regulations Rand had so nicely quoted at him, Elbbirt had the right.

“I won’t volunteer any information, but if they ask me if I knew you intended to defy your medical orders, I won’t lie.” She’d still be in trouble for not reporting it, but she’d deal with that. What if he had a clot and it passed into his heart or lungs in the middle of a dangerous experiment or while he was in charge on the bridge? Maybe minor or unlikely risk now, but it still put this ship at risk.

“I wouldn’t expect you to lie for me.” Roman replied. Then he shook his head. “Not defy them outright, more like… get to them in a little while longer? Delay them a bit?” He wasn’t lying, he didn’t intend to never go, he never did when it came to scheduled visits. He just never managed to actually go.

He figured if Elbbirt thought he was going to collapse on the bridge or something, he’d still be off duty. The dangerous clots had been removed during the surgery, right? There were small, fading marks from the incisions to allow access to his veins and arteries to prove that. Surely if the risk the smaller clots posed were anything worth worrying about, a closer eye would be kept? But it wasn’t. Perhaps they were too small to fully block anything. And so then, it wasn’t a problem. They were supposed to be dissolving on their own anyway, since the only reason they were there in the first place was the issue in his leg. And that was gone.

“Or come with me. Half an hour, max. You don’t have to wait for the results. Elbbirt can find you later.”

Rand

Roman sighed softly. Rationally, Rand was right. It was only a half hour to be done with it, and then Elbbirt could send him the results digitally for all he cared, as long as he wasn’t going back. But still, he sat at the desk in the lab, looking at Rand without moving from his seat. He didn’t want to force her to report him, or to put her in the position of lying for him or getting him in trouble. That was the last thing he’d want, it wasn’t fair to her. But it was like his fear had gotten worse. He really did not want to go.

~ Roman

Last resort it is then. Rand’s demeanor only showed worry and a hint of fear - for him, and sadness. He was going to be so mad at her, but she’d deal with that worry later. She understood, she really did, but he needed this to make sure he was okay. She moved closer like she was going to sit back down, but then she was closer still, right in front of him, and then she was hugging him. It always helped her when she was anxious. She hugged him for as long as he let her.

Rand moved closer, and she looked like she was going to sit down. Maybe she had decided to let him make his own choices regardless of how poor they were? But then she was hugging him, and not letting go, and he hugged her back for several minutes. That always made him feel better. But he was surprised she was hugging him in the lab. She never did that.

Now, normally Rand would never, ever do such a thing on duty or in the labs. But desperate times and all that…Rand stepped behind him and that wonderful new chair that had wheels and before Roman knew it Rand had him out from behind the desk and was headed for the door. Oh she knew he would try to stop at the door, but either he would have to make a scene that will attract attention to get her to stop OR he would have to just get up and go.

Rand

Suddenly, he was out from behind the desk and partway to the door. His chair had wheels! Rand had apparently decided to simply roll him there. No! He put his feet down to stop the chair, but the motion and then the shock of hitting the ground and trying to stop the chair hurt his right leg and he picked it up, rubbing the sore muscle. “Wait, wait, stop!” Roman cried, trying to keep his voice down. “Rand, stop!” But the chair moved steadily towards the door. Just before she pushed him out into the hall in the chair he stood up out of it, putting his hand on the edge of the door.

Rand winced when his feet hit the floor, and she felt the impact jar him where her hands were on the back of the chair. Oh to be able to stop, but she knew if she did, if he thought she wasn’t serious, but only ‘making a point’ he would just hide in the labs. Avoidance would have killed him. If not for the accident on Kelmao they wouldn’t have known till it was too late. At his final insistent ‘stop’ and the movement to stand she did. That way the forward motion of the chair didn’t hurt his leg. “Then get up and walk.”

If he made a scene, it would draw attention to them he did not want. If he didn’t do anything, she’d push him all the way to Sickbay in that thing and Elbbirt would definitely think something had gone wrong. So he went with option three, stand up and go. “I’ll walk, fine, just put that back, will you?” He said, looking out into the hall to make sure there wasn’t anyone around.

~ Roman

Rand felt like half an inch tall, and from his clipped tone she knew he was upset with her, but she also recognized the tinge of panic. She fought the urge to hide her hands. She felt sick and her chest hurt, and not from panic, at making him do something that every instinct told him not to do. It had to be done. She quickly moved the chair before he changed his mind. She grabbed his hand and moved out the door. “I am sure the sooner we rip this bandaid off the sooner it stops stinging.” At least he was standing now. Just to get him moving. He might stay mad at her, but to make sure he was healthy and safe it would be worth it.

Rand

Roman felt sick, but for him it was because of the panic. But he was too stubborn to call it that. Rand grabbed his hand and pulled him towards the door. His lopsided steps were stiff, like his shoes were full of lead. He was upset with her, because he was scared and he didn’t want to go, but he also understood why she was doing it, for his health, and that made it hard to be mad at her for it. He was letting her pull him down the hall, it wasn’t that far to Sickbay. But it would be clear he did not want to be there.

Sickbay was the most noticeable part of his avoidance, but there were other things Roman would avoid, because they reminded him too much of the attack or Jay. It had taken him time to get back into martial arts. It would have been worse if he’d ever had to work in the lab they worked in. But he hadn’t. He avoided certain foods, shows, hobbies besides martial arts. But those were easier to hide. Affected duty less. That was part of the reason he dropped his original research project when he lost his notes. He couldn’t finish it. Not without Jay.

~ Roman

Randy would know there were other avoidances, even if Roman never said. Rand did too from those early weeks of late night talking and how looong it took Roman to say anything at all about himself. She didn’t say anything while they walked. She did turn to walk next to him rather than appearing to drag him. She squeezed his hand much like she had when he’d woken up after his surgery, in rhythm with her breath.

Entering sickbay Elbbirt wasn’t surprised to see Rand with Alden but he was surprised they were there at all. Randy took them straight back to the same room Roman had been in before. The imager already set up. He gave Rand a questioning look. She didn’t look okay. She was pale, clammy, and her eyes were pinpricks and she wasn’t looking at anyone. She was on the close side of having a panic attack, but why? Roman didn’t look much better. But he knew why Roman was anxious. “Alight you two have your normal seats.” Meaning the biobed and chair next to it.

Rand was doing that thing again, where she squeezed his hand at a regular rate. She’d done that when he was staying in Sickbay, when she was breathing slowly with him. His breaths followed the rhythm she squeezed with, helping keep him a little calmer. His grip got tighter as they entered Sickbay and Randy led them back to that same room. The room made him sick. He didn’t want to be here. He wanted to turn and walk out. But Rand still had his hand, and she was still moving forward. Keeping his hand up so he could keep hold of Rand’s, he pulled himself up onto the biobed, using his free hand to help his right leg all the way up. Then he lay back.

The Elbbirt walked in and they got started. Rand didn’t let go of his hand.

Rand

The images always seemed to take forever to Roman, even if they weren’t actually doing that many of them. The images looked better than before, there were considerably less of the dark spots on his images. Only a few left, they could be counted on one hand now. The one that Rand had seen near his heart, was still there, if a bit smaller than before. And there were a few other floating clots of varying size, none as big as the ones that had been removed surgically. If they took imaging of his leg, or if it was visible on other imaging, it was looking good. The graft was in place and the regenerated muscle was growing stronger, beginning to look more normal.

Despite his nervousness, Roman had a see, I told you this was unnecessary ready to go, for when they got the results. From his place on the biobed he looked over to her. She looked nervous. Because they were in Sickbay? Or because of him? He wasn’t sure.

~ Roman

Rand was watching the images as best she could from where she sat, she was also watching Randy as he peered over Elbbirt’s shoulder to make sure the images were clear. Elbbirt had Randy take one last image and while he was looking at it he sent Randy out for Enoxaparin. The images took 10 minutes to take. Elbbirt turned the screen around and went over each one showing a clot. Rand didn’t mean to, but she squeezed Roman’s hand hard when Elbbirt got the one near his heart. Randy returned with a hypo. “Anticoagulant to keep the remaining ones from getting bigger until your body can naturally dissolve them. Randy will stop by to see you once a day to give it to you.”

As soon as Elbbirt and Roman were done talking and Roman took the hypo they were leaving.

Rand