Posted June 22, 2022, 10:43 a.m. by Ensign Rand Farquharson (Yeoman First Class) (Jennifer Ward)
Posted by Commander Roman Alden (First Officer & Chief Science Officer) in Side sim: Matters of the Heart
Posted by Ensign Rand Farquharson (Yeoman First Class) in Side sim: Matters of the Heart
Posted by Commander Roman Alden (First Officer & Chief Science Officer) in Side sim: Matters of the Heart
(snip)
Roman kept playing gently with her hair until it was fully detangled. Then when he was done, he paused, and looked down at her lovingly. Even sick and tired, with (still admittedly messy, but much less messy) hair, she was really pretty. Then she started leaning in to kiss him and he remembered what Elbbirt said to him after his concussion (and the events following it). He put a finger to her mouth instead. “No, wait. You can’t do that. There’s err..” he pointed at her brother and at the doctor in the room. “Others around.”
~ Roman
Rand moved back, shocked, and embarrassed. What was she thinking, kissing him with people in the room? But she had the distinct memory of Roman kissing her because Randy was teasing them about snogging. Or…did she imagine that? No. No, Roman just knew that she would prefer privacy. They were dating…weren’t they? They were engaged! She remembered, the blue star and the observation lounge. Her grandmother’s ring. She looked down at her hand, but it was wrapped in bandages. Rand sighed, Roman was just being thoughtful.
Until after the shift change and Elbbirt and Shrine came in to do a session with the dermal regenerator. There was no ring on her finger. She’d imagined it! She had been so sure! Her relationship with Roman, er…Cmdr Alden had felt so real. He had been so affectionate, he was staying in sickbay with her…no no, there was something…he had to stay. Something about the security detail. What had she done?! She tried to remember, but the harder she pushed the memories the more her head hurt, even making herself sick to her stomach. She’d dreamed it! She was calling him ‘Roman’. The first officer she was calling, Roman. OH GOD what had she done!
After Shrine left, Rand started ringing her hands, but the bandages mostly stopped that. She resumed her silence, and that heartbreaking confused look. Her heart rate was up some, but not enough to be alarming, yet. As well as her respiration. To avoid any awkward conversation she wouldn’t look at him. He was just being nice to her. There was no way he even thought about her like that. She escaped into sleep where it wouldn’t matter if she could remember or not. She would talk to Randy in the morning.
Rand
Roman could tell something was wrong, something was confusing her. She’d figure it out, he was sure. But it looked like it was making her really nervous, so he set a hand on hers and asked, “Miranda… Are you okay?”
It was distressing how much the sound of her name in his voice made her both feel better and wonderfully nervous. No she wasn’t okay. The only thing that she had felt certain about since she woke up, was not true. And she was not going to tell him about that.
By morning when she woke, he was gone, off to work. He had a busy day planned, so he wasn’t sure he’d make it back till that evening, unless Randy paged him for something. He spent most of the day on XO duties he’d been avoiding, which meant a lot of rushing back and forth across the ship, his communicator kept close throughout it all in case Randy needed to quickly contact him.
~ Roman
When Rand woke, Roman…Alden was gone. That was probably best. She’d been making a fool out of herself, and putting Rom…the Cmdr in a horrible position. He was being exceptionally kind and careful around her. Now she really wanted to go home. To Scotland, away from here and the humiliation.
Randy noticed something was wrong, more so than normal. “Rand,” he sat down on the edge of her bed, speaking softly in Gaelic to her. “What is it? What’s bothering you.”
She fidgeting with her hands through the bandages, staring at her lap. “Randy…I’m not well.” He raised a brow after a moment of silence, and tipped her chin up to make her look at him. She avoided his gaze though until he gently grabbed her hands. “I…I know the concussion is making me confused, but…I…I don’t remember things…my memories aren’t right. I…I think I should be sent home.” The idea made the nerves in her arms and her heart ache painfully, like they were breaking. “I…I thought I was going to marry him.”
It took a couple hours for Randy to get the whole problem out of Rand, and then another hour before he finally gave up trying to reassure her. The more he insisted everything was fine, she wasn’t confused, the more anxious and agitated she got. She worked herself into a full blown panic attack. He finally got her calmed down, and mostly asleep. Randy left to go find Roman. Maybe he could talk some sense into her.
Randy found him, walked up to him and took Roman’s things right out of his hands. “You’re fiancé needs you. She thinks she dreamed the whole thing - you and her. She is freaking out because she tried to kiss you last night. She thinks you told her ‘no’ because, well, you aren’t engaged or anything. She worked herself into a full panic attack.
She’s resting now. As much as I would love to see the look on her face when you set her right, I think you two need some privacy.”Randy
“Randy, wha-” Roman, started, irritated, when suddenly his PaDD, stack of paperwork, and other things were pulled away from him. But his face changed when Randy explained - worried and upset, as his hand reached into his pocket and wrapped around the ring. “Dreamed it?” Then he glanced at Randy. “She’s had a panic attack and you left her alone in there? Somebody needs to be with her!” And then he was gone, rushing down the hallway at a run to reach Sickbay.
Randy looked highly offended, as if he’d leave Rand alone in the middle of a panic attack. He just said she was resting now. However, before his glare could register with Roman, or Randy could explain exactly how twisted around Rand had made herself, Roman was gone, at a run. Randy chuckled and looked down at the things he was holding. He shrugged at the guard that had followed him, “Don’t suppose we can hit the rec hall?”
The guard shook his head, “No,” and then pointed back toward the lift. “You might not have a sense of self-preservation Randy, but I have a very healthy respectful fear of what Morgan will do to me if I don’t follow her instructions.” Randy laughed and made his way leisurely back to the lift and sickbay.
Rand was laying, her back to the door, drifting in half asleep state of numbness and confusion. She heard the door open and startled slightly. Did she imagine that too? She recognized the footsteps almost immediately and closed her eyes. Maybe, if she acted like she was asleep, he wouldn’t feel like he had to talk to her.
When he got there, he took a seat by her, breathing hard (he wasn’t really supposed to run at all yet, let alone across a deck and a half), and took her hand. “Randy told me… Miranda, it wasn’t a dream. It was real. I love you, okay?” He was leaned in close, speaking quietly in Gaelic, looking really worried and upset.
~ Roman
Randy told him? How humiliating. Why would Randy do that to her? And now Rom…Cmdr Alden was here. Her head felt hot like fire making her beyond dizzy (like her head might burn to ash and blow away), and then icy cold creating a sick pounding in her head that spread to her whole body, and it sounded like a train roaring through her ears. So she didn’t actually hear what Roman was saying. What she heard was every humiliating scenario her mind could come up with. Pretending to be asleep wasn’t really going to work either, not with Roman leaned in so close. He couldn’t miss the change in her breathing - rapid and then holding her breath, and then quickly moving towards hyperventilating - or the way her eyes squeezed shut - against the pain in her chest or to unsuccessfully stop from crying or both (why did he have to come there, wasn’t her delusions bad enough?) - and of course the monitors would give it all away anyway. But she stubbornly refused to let go of the totally unconvincing ruse of sleep.
Rand
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