Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Teebo (Chief of Keeping The Ship Together (CE)) in Pre-Sim [Sickbay]: What the…?

Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Teebo (Chief of Keeping The Ship Together (CE)) in Pre-Sim [Sickbay]: What the…?

Posted by Lieutenant Andromeda DeLion (Chief of Keeping Our Bodies Healthy (CMO)) in Pre-Sim [Sickbay]: What the…?
Posted by… suppressed (5) by the Post Ghost! 👻
The transporter room had been a hub of activity all morning. Guests and crew had been beaming on and off the USS Constellation in an almost constant stream of energy particles. Lieutenant Birch barely had time to grab a quick bite to eat and check his fingers for blisters before he was back at his console energizing his way to an early grave. I shouldn’t complain, he sighed to himself as a rather stern-looking Klingon faded in a photon cascade. I could be bored doing inventory in the cargo bay.

The console chirped and he sighed audibly. Only another half-hour until shift change and he could try out that new holodeck program. Tapping in a few commands, Birch slid his fingers across the panel and engaged the transporter. The pad hummed dutifully to life, brightened as the system converted energy to matter before falling dim once more. He looked down at his log, noted the single name on the display, and plastered on his most welcoming smile.

“Welcome aboard the Constellation, Lieutenant…”

His voice trailed off into confusion as he blinked at the empty transporter pad. Frowning, Birch checked his systems. The computer showed a successful transport of one life form, so then where—?

“Warm days, friend!” a voice drawled from his hip, nearly sending Birch out of his skin. His startled cry had been embarrassingly loud even to his own ears. When he could swallow his heart back into place, he turned to see where the voice had come from. It took him a moment for his mind to process what he saw.

The creature—he wasn’t sure what else to call it; he’d never seen its like before—stared up at him with black button eyes gently set into a rounded scaly head. Its large, square jaw almost comically thrust out as thin lips peeled away from two rows of jagged yellow teeth. Was it… smiling? Its stocky body was perched atop two rounded legs that ended in nubs that could have been feet or perhaps large toes. Birch thought he noticed a stubby tail drifting lazily back and forth behind it, but he wasn’t sure of anything by this point. To him, it looked like someone had crammed one of his daughter’s stuffed dinosaur toys into a Starfleet uniform.

After a long silence, the creature’s toothy grin faded and it cocked its head at him. A strange guttural sound bubbled up from its throat and sizzled between its lips, chased by a quick flick of a black tongue. A moment later, the voice came again. “Something wrong, there, hoss? Might want to button that hatch afore you let the bugs in, ‘less of course you go for that kinda thing, ha!”

Birch blinked again. The voice hadn’t come from the creature’s mouth, but from a shiny silver disk attached to the frilled bandolier it wore across its barrel chest. It gurgled at him again.

“Take you’ve never seen a keb before, son?” The creature hissed and sputtered briefly before offering him a stout clawed paw. “You can call him Teebo, or Lieutenant if you fancy. As for my own self, Pit will do just fine. Pleasure.”

“T-Teebo?” Birch sputtered, baffled. “Pit?”

The squat saurian made a dejected sound and lowered his paw. “While I’d fancy a spell to yammer in your ear, give you the skinny, my partner and I are overdue to let the medical staff take a gander at the chief, clear him for duty. If it’s not too much trouble, would you kindly point us to Sickbay?”

Birch could only nod and point. The creature—Teebo, was it?—gave a curt nod and a wave before turning and heading towards the door.

“Cool nights, friend!” the voice crackled over Teebo’s shoulder. “Once you get your chewer off the deck, swing on by and give us some gab, yeah?”

Teebo stumped into Sickbay and looked carefully about. He stepped aside before yet another Starfleet officer could trip over him in consternation. The Federation had made contact with hundreds of alien races across thousands of light years, and yet he still managed to surprise, shock, and alarm. It was almost enough to make him miss his mud hole on Rolya, but that was a long time passed. Being amongst tallfolk was nothing if not an adventure, after all.

After a moment of consideration, the keb noted one of the medical staff not tending to a pressing duty and shuffled over. Tapping the silver disk at his shoulder with one claw, he purred something at the officer.

“Warm days, friend!” Pit buzzed cheerily. “Lieutenant Teebo reporting for inspection!”
—Teebo, Chief Engineer—

Andromeda turned from where she was reading reports, still with her nose in the PADD. “Wonderful, wonderful. Biodbed… 6 is open, we can go over now.” She was so engrossed in her reports she completely failed to notice her patient’s unusual biology, height, or any other traits that would usually please her to no end. She was CMO for her ability to deal with the unexpected after all.
-Andromeda DeLion, CMO

Teebo eyed the woman, then leaned around her legs to look for the biobed she’d indicated. He couldn’t help but squint at her before tottering over towards where he was supposed to be. The keb’s scaly lips peeled back in a grimace, and he gurgled low in his throat.

“Hey, now,” Pit cautioned from his shoulder, “no need for that kind of guff, boss. She’s preoccupied, is all.”

Teebo hissed crisply and stared up at the biobed, cast a quick glance around the room, then shrugged and started climbing. It was an awkward display of grunting and flailing, but he finally flopped on the foam cushion with a sigh. Bubbling and hissing as he righted himself, the keb waited patiently if a touch out of breath.

A mechanical chuckle sizzle from Pit’s port. “Mayhap next time I could ask ‘round, rustle you up a booster? Now be a good boy and you can have a loli.”

Teebo folded his bulky arms across his barrel chest and flicked his tongue from between his front teeth, pointedly ignoring the barb.

“Guessin’ that’s a no.”
—Teebo, Chief Engineer—

Andromeda whirled around, finally looking over her PADD to see her patient. “Oh!” Such an exclamation may be more associated with fear or surprise, but in her case, it accompanied utter delight. “Finally, a non-mammalian! I’m sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.” She blinked for a moment. “I’m Andromeda.” She offered belatedly. “Do you have any health concerns that need to be addressed or just the scan?”
-Andromeda DeLion, CMO

Once again Teebo made an attempt at pleasantries, gritting his teeth at the female and thrusting a paw out toward her. While stiff and practiced—and almost comical—it was the warmest gesture he could manage. His thin lips rippled as he purred and sizzled a reply to her question. Silence hung thick in the air for a moment before the keb’s countenance drooped and he tapped the silver disk on his shoulder.

Andromeda accepted the offered paw and shook it briskly, waiting a bit awkwardly for the tech to work.

“Sorry, sorry,” Pit coughed mechanically. “I, uh, hadn’t expected you to be so forthright with the lady, chief. Reckoned that was a second-date thing.”

Teebo glared, grumbled a reply. Even to untrained ears it sounded scathing.

“Yes, well, I know she asked, but…”

His glare deepened, and the keb gestured toward the female with a clawed digit.

Pit sighed audibly. “Pardon, ma’am, but the chief says that he’s had BzZt, uh, indigestion as of late. Says it tends to give him a bout of bZzT once in a while.”

Teebo blinked, cocked his head to the side.

“Apologies, friends,” Pit declared rapidly. One could almost say the AI was panicking. “It’s lookin’ like there’s a bit of a problem with the ol’ language processor. Why don’t you be a sweetie, give the chief a quick scan-a-roo while I hunker down a spell, get to the bottom of it. Won’t take a jiff!”

Before Teebo could protest, a soft hum came from his shoulder before fading. Rolling his eyes, he gave Andromeda his best version of an apologetic shrug.
—Teebo, Chief Engineer—

[bumped 6/15, 6/22, and 6/27]

Andromeda blinked incredulously at each remark from the odd AI, almost at a loss. “If I didn’t know better I’d say that wasn’t even Standard.”

She shook her head and returned the shrug, but powered up the biobed sensors regardless. She switched the species setting and settled back, waiting for results.
-Andromeda DeLion, CMO