Posted Aug. 25, 2020, 8:32 p.m. by Lieutenant Junior Grade Dum and Dee Tweedle (Chief Engineer) (Russell Watt)
Collective gasps went up from those in the transporter room as the transporter beam sparkle dissipated and the noise associated with the transporter beam faded into nothingness. In addition to the transporter operator, an Engineer was in there to replace a blown isolinear chip, a new worker in the onboard casino had beamed aboard and one of the Captain’s neutered tribbles had escaped and was in there as well. For the tribble to let out any sound instead of a purr showed just how shocking the appearance of the two new beings was.
The new arrivals on the transporter pad were unusual (possibly even for the Constellation). One of the blobs was tall and slender and almost seemed to be translucent, and looked to be jam/jelly. The other newcomer was short and squat and wide and was very opaque and dark brown in colour. There were bits of what seemed to be peanuts throughout the second being. They kind of slid off the transporter padd, “We are the Tweedles,” tall and slender announced, “I am Dee Tweedle.”
“And I am Dum Tweedle,” short and squat added. Then they said in unison, “we’re the Co-Chief Engineers. Will we be getting one or two sets of quarters?”
“Umm, err,” the transporter chief said, “I err … that’s the XO’s or CO’s area, not mine, I just stand here, wait for someone to say energise and I push these buttons and these glowy lights flash and sounds start. Then people either disappear in a sparkly effect or arrive in a sparkly effect. And then I wait until the next crewmember needs transporting and the excitement starts again. I’ve actually had time to compose limericks in the long hours between transportations. Would you like to hear the one I composed about our captain?”
“No, definitely not,” said Dee, “unless it is aobut aeroplane jelly or bega peanut butter, we’re not interested in art. I mean soup cans as art? Please! Jars of Crunchy Peanut Butter would have been far better.”
“Hush Dee, don’t cause a fuss,” Dum said.
“Don’t you hush me, Dum,” Dee flared up.
“Ah, gentlemen, Lieutenants, we are expecting new crewmembers to arrive, if you could move along, we will get them on board. As I said, maybe the Captain or XO would enjoy a debate with you both on the matter of foodstuffs as art.”
“Gentlemen? Gentlemen?” Dum flared up this time, “we are neither gentlemen nor ladies we are anthropomorphic beings of no fixed gender assignment, you will henceforth address us as such.”
“Settle down Dum” it was Dee that time that was trying to do the calming.
They slid towards the door and out into the corridor arguing back and forth all the time.
“A married couple as the Chief Engineer?” that was the casino worker, “should we be worried?”
“I thoght them more likely to be akin to siblings,” opined the Engineer, who confirmed the new isolinear chip was working before closing down his tricorder, “with them as our new Chief Engineers, things are about to get real nutty around here.”
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