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Arboretum - Sienna Comes Clean

Posted Dec. 1, 2021, 5:15 p.m. by Lieutenant Siennadye Nox (Counselor) (Amber DeSadier)

Posted by Captain Johann Dvorak (CO) in Arboretum - Sienna Comes Clean

Posted by Lieutenant Siennadye Nox (Counselor) in Arboretum - Sienna Comes Clean

Posted by Captain Johann Dvorak (CO) in Arboretum - Sienna Comes Clean
Posted by… suppressed (5) by the Post Ghost! 👻

SNIP

“Pfft, no,” he said, chuckling slightly. “No, we imagined that you just didn’t want this to be a problem. It’s pretty clear that your evil plan was to simply suffer in silence indefinitely.” He was trying to mirror her own attempt at levity, though it didn’t sound right. Probably because it wasn’t something to be light about.

She laughed softly, tears stinging her eyes as she found herself relieved that either they knew her so well, or her work had paid off. Nefarious never was her way of handling things. She closed them for a moment, the heat of her tears becoming too much. Her heart hurt so deeply even the reassurance was not enough to keep her feelings in check.

“I didn’t mean to ridicule or trivialize that,” he said a second later. She probably knew, but it was the sort of thing one had to be sensitive about.

– Johann Dvorak, CO

She shook her head and walked the few steps to the bench. Sienna sat down and placed her elbows on her knees and her head in her hands. Words couldn’t come anymore, just tears. God how she wanted her husband here to hold her.

Johann sat down next to her. He was briefly torn; Sienna clearly needed some emotional support, but would that make this better or worse?

I’m sorry. she thought to Johann, unable to utter the words.

Nox, CNS

“It’s okay,” he said aloud. He could imagine himself offering his former executive officer a hug of some sort if she were this upset about something. Then again, he also couldn’t imagine her ever being this upset about anything. Reflecting on that just made the whole thing even stranger.

“You can literally cry on my shoulder if you need to,” he said simply. He didn’t actually budge though, from where he had sat down next to her, letting her choose what to.

– Johann Dvorak, CO

Johann was right, Siennadye Nox in either universe was simply not one to fall apart. She was cool, calm, and compassionate in almost every situation. This though, was intimately personal. She just didn’t have the ability to detach from it in this moment. He wasn’t her husband, but he was her friend. And as her friend, he was offering support in the best way he knew how. He understood her to be in pain and wanted to help. Yeah she thought to him with an internal sigh, I do. Sienna laid her head on his shoulder and wrapped her arms around his upper arm.

Okay, he thought.

She let the tears come as they would, let herself in this moment be the grieving woman she was. For the first time, she let herself be completely authentic and vulnerable. She took comfort in the familiar, strange though it was. Then again, her life was strange these days.

Stoicism was Johann’s refuge from the abject lunacy of everything that was taking place. Which, actually wasn’t a fair description of the events of today; it was more accurate to say that this was the ultimate outcome of the abject lunacy that had been quietly going on for years.

After a while she lifted a hand to wipe her damp cheeks and sniffled. She pulled away from her friend and tried to compose herself with a little laugh. “I promise I will not always be that tragic. I don’t usually fall apart like that.”

Nox, CNS

The thought of helping her wipe her cheeks did cross his mind, but he promptly dismissed it as far too intimate a gesture without much conscious thought.

“Yeah, I figured,” he replied instead. He smirked a little bit, trying to go along with her own attempts at levity.

“We should talk about Vora, though,” he said a moment later when he felt that a slight topic adjustment was appropriate. “I know I said we knew you didn’t intend to do steal anybody, and we do. And she does. But she’s… umm…” How to describe it? Probably exactly the same way she did. “She doesn’t doubt anyone’s intentions. But she does find it… umm… weird, that there’s some not-that-different reality where I’m not-that-different, and things ended up differently. But I think a lot of that has less to do with you and more to do with me, actually. Or with… men, generally, that she’s known before. I don’t know what she’s told you about that, but she’s known a lot of bad men.” Of course, Siennadye had seen one of those bad men in person. In a pool of their own blood. When Vora stabbed him. In self defense, of course.

– Johann Dvorak, CO

Sienna nodded. She could imagine that this was a very strange situation for Vora just as much as it might be for Johann and herself. “Yes. And she might be taken aback by the idea that a decision or two is all that might have kept her from meeting you. A decision or two that other people made and she had no choice in. Even though it didn’t here, I can see why there might be a bit of .... not exactly fear perhaps, but worry that her life could be changed that way. Maybe she even thinks about how the other Siennadye Nox had the capability of falling in love with you and you with her. What if’s are always a bit of a roller coaster we would rather not explore and yet our brains are wired to think about them anyway. People with strong imaginations are more prone to longer lists of scenarios than most.”

Nox, CNS


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