Posted Nov. 7, 2022, 4:03 p.m. by Civilian Rex Ariki (Resident) (Ty Napier)
SNIP
Sharp pain exposed nerves connecting straight between the two human hearts. Everything blurred together for an infinity and bounded back in an instant soaking through eyes the same yet different, filled with the greatest love in all the universes. Hidden beneath bones mapped an extraordinary truth and tale one not separated by the other. Pieces of each, hearts beating outside own’s body autonomous yet connected with the same fixated guard hardening against the centre of consciousness knowing this gift came from a burden since the first spark of life of the first universe. Life would never cease to exist through the martyr which gave permission to pass down legacy, each sentence beginning and ending on a daughter to live the unlived. Mother to daughter, parent to child. Love that never relinquishes, bearing witness shattering fabrications of a continuation outside a mother’s own desires or wishes. This both the burden and the offering. None would change once the contract was entered.
“DNA doesn’t make me your mother, Miha. You have a mother. And a father. Both good people I choose for you,” Billie said tossing the last of the bags onto the sailboat. Once, a long time ago she had met the couple in dire circumstances. While they had troubles of their own, they had endured and weathered the storms. Closing one eye, she turned her head towards to the distant skies. Time to catch the trade winds. Emotional odysseys for both laid hard to starboard with only a broken heart for a compass. With a long exhale she asked only one question before taking a seat at the rudder, “did you bring the tequila?”
Billie Rodriquez (Rex Ariki)
Elna nodded and pointed to one of the larger bags. “Four bottles actually. Lime and salt as requested as well. And your friend Maria insisted on more food than we will need for three days. And I don’t know what I am supposed to say about my parents. Are you expecting a ‘Thank you’? Well thanks for making sure I grew up in a family full of laughter and love while you abandoned me to do whatever it is you have been doing Captain Rodriquez.”
Mother’s anchor when adversity threatens to steal security, enveloping a personal shroud of protection from darkness when all others have deserted. She was that last stand to hold the line, assured of surrender to the full measure, giving her last heartbeat and breath for the survival of offspring. That was a mother’s instinct. And a child’s heart a place to return, forgetting the story behind the story with selfish reflections. Whatever indecisiveness life pulled, a mother’s love was fixed true north, never waivered. Faith of a child that a mother was somehow a goddess, perfect and holly faded with each mistake lifting the veil, imperfections exposed to the light, laying blame at her feet. Every action judged fairly and unfairly in unequal measures, assigning fault, forgetting to award benediction. Failing most of all to make allowances or to understand shortcomings excepting to live as one integrated self.
“Not now Miha. Te prometo que te lo contaré todo. I will tell you everything I can and answer your questions. For now, we sail. Tonight we drink some tequila. Hopefully too much. And then, you will understand,” Billie said as she moved the bags around not looking up at her daughter. Elna starred hard at the top of Billie’s head for several long seconds before slumping her shoulders in defeat, heading towards the main boom to begin checking over the mainsail and jib.
Each with her own broken heart for a compass, Billie at last guided the Princesa II slowly out of the dock and towards the open sea. Winds blew, commanding actions and reactions, decisions to be made or ignored. Consequences and outcomes dependant on the command of the ship, directing sails, altering shape. Out here, on the seas, calm or storm raged, be ready, hold fast, wind’s changed without notice. Water rippled across the hull as the bow parted the waves, cutting through the heaven’s tranquillity, receding further and further from the shore and safe harbour. Sea sprayed salted tears, splashing the deck, filling sorrow of wishful time and heartless fate. Soon evening would fall bringing new and old stars dancing across the dark expanse connecting dots from heart beat afar through dreams and memories to the last lonely path to home. Halai.
Billie Rodriquez (Rex Ariki)
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