Posted Jan. 20, 2023, 10 p.m. by Captain Eela Dasca (Lt. Governor) (Lindsay B)
Posted by Lieutenant Commander Sharah Fayth (Chief Star Fleet Medical Officer) in Starfleet Complex- A Summons
Posted by Captain Eela Dasca (Lt. Governor) in Starfleet Complex- A Summons
(snip)
Eela gazed at her, the shared understanding so very tangible between them. She nodded slowly. “Only the bridge crew and the Board of Inquiry and a handful of other brass know what went down. I made a really hard decision and honestly it could have gone either way. They could have decided it was justified or I was culpable of negligence. I feel for your former captain because there is nothing worse then waking up from a coma as a commanding officer and not knowing what happened to your crew. There are hurts that you never get over, you just find a way to live with them until they hurt less and less.”
“So, not to be too much of a downer after such a happy moment for you, when you hit those crux moments, keep in mind people like Donnelly who only know what they know. As you serve longer and longer, you know more and are brought into the fold more. It’s hard to remember what it was like to be a new officer and clueless as to the world of command. There are those that make decisions that seem so far away from you. Your only responsibility is to follow orders and do your duty as best you can. It’s simpler if not always easy.” She smiled, even if it felt bittersweet. “I know you’re already at the point where the weight feels heavier. The trick is to see where it is necessary and where you can set it down. Don’t let it crush you.”
~Eela Dasca, Lt. Gov.
Sharah nodded slowly. “Cpt Asam retired after that. Real and truly retired. Not a short break and then return. She’d had enough. I have a little more perspective on it though, I guess. Her son is my closest friend. His children are my godchildren. So I was there through it all, both professionally and personally. This probably the worst time to tell you this, but I don’t want command. I never even wanted to be a department head. Being CSO on the Ark Angel was a learning experience, and one I am glad for, but I made decisions that…I don’t see how I could have done things differently, but I knew I was the wrong person for the job. On the Viking…well, I was dragged into the decision making process, into the line of command and I can tell you I don’t want it. I’m not made for it. That’s not me being humble, just honest. I love it here, and I feel like this position suits me. But this is where excel, where I know I make a difference. I make hard decisions every day, and I struggle with some of them.” If something was to crush her, it wouldn’t be her work as a doctor or the decisions she had to make as an officer. At least not right now. It was....other things…outside of that. “Advising the command staff is as close as I want to get to the center chair.”
“Oh Sharah, you don’t have to have four pips and the title of commanding officer to be a leader,” Eela said with a soft smile. “You’re already one. I’m glad you know what you want and what you don’t. No one is going to force you down a path you want to go. But don’t think for a second the role you have right now is all that different than the one I’ve had,” she said with a tiny wink.
“You amaze me, you know that. Truly Eela. After everything you’ve been through, professionally, personally, physically, you kept going and carved out a place for yourself. I know you said sometimes you don’t know where the inner you is, but she’s there and still being a thorn in the side of those who get in your way.”
Fayth, SFCMO
The simple and heartfelt declaration startled Eela for a moment before she smirked. “You know, my friend Roger said that maybe the brain injury didn’t change me so much as let me be who I’ve always been without all the filters and propriety. I told him he was full of crap, but after being here as long as I’ve been I’m starting to thinking he might be right.” Dasca shook her head. “He’s never going to let me live it down,” she said, but she wasn’t upset in fact there was great warmth behind her words.
“But thank you,” Eela said. “I didn’t always know how to keep going, and one night we’ll chat about those but I will need drinks. But the thing that got me through was really amazing people in my life. Without them, I wouldn’t have made it through.”
~Eela Dasca, Lt. Gov.
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